Mm... But some children need to be spanked, and many have already agreed with me. Obviously if you're hitting with a paddle or too hard, it's not appropriate. A temporary red mark that doesn't cause bruising is fine in my opinion. I was spanked when needed, but usually words worked with me. Usually words work with children over all, actually, but there are runts who just won't take your words as an answer / won't take it seriously, and it's those children who need the temporary red hand mark on their butts.
Bruising, bleeding, or using anything but your hand is inappropriate.
But see you might differ from other people when it comes to how you were spanked.
Some are spanked through clothes, some are degraded and stripped. Some children are still whipped with birches. My parents personally didn't use their bare hand because they viewed that as abuse. They used a plastic spatula or a wooden spoon through the clothes. At church, the topic for us kids in sunday school was who did what and got hit with what. Again, I learned, as did many other kids I knew/have known growing up, to shut my mouth and not get caught. I didn't correct the behavior.
There are ungrateful brats who won't listen, that's called being rebellious and it's almost always a phase. Getting frustrated and striking them doesn't fix any of that. If you can't hit a co-worker you're frustrated with when they don't listen to you, why can you hit a child who you're frustrated with because they also won't listen to you?
I regret being spanked, I regret being struck by my parents. I still flinch when I see the object that was used to spank me even if my parents aren't around. It's done a lot more damage than good, especially because it was used past the preschool age.
Time outs, taking to-s, grounding, they're harder to do. They take more time and effort, time parents esp. in today's america just don't want to give. Thwack a child and say no, the kid's not going to want to get hurt and at least where you can see it, they won't do it again. They don't
learn, at least not in a healthy manner.
Parents, to do time outs and groundings, have to be firm and be an ever looming presence. If the kid's grounded, they have to be home to make sure the child stays home. To make sure tv and computers are off. That drains a parent but it also bonds parent and child.
I was grounded for a week once by my big brother and it was a living hell for me, the worst punishment I've ever had and yet I learned more from that
one experience than I have from any sort of corporal punishment I've experienced growing up. Words and time and consistent behavior are what kids learn from, I'm positive of it.
To be honest, if you're looking at it from a purely logistical point of view, spanking doesn't work because of the inability to set guidelines,
specific guidelines on how it's supposed to work. The minority who abuse their kids can and to be honest
should ruin it for everyone so that nobody ever again tries to use 'punishment' to excuse child abuse. I've seen it working in schools and as a camp counselor and there's just no other way to stop them. :x "It's my religious right to punish my child how I want" "kk" Back in the old days, nobody thought twice about whipping children unitl they bled because that was the social norm. Then we hit an era where we were told not to punish our children at all and now we're heading right back down towards flat out child abuse and calling it punishment.
The actual method that actually works lies in between permissive and abusive parenting.
