Fanfiction Lounge

[Furaigon]

I have a question about the chapter size limit and this seemed like the best place to ask. One sticky says at least 500 words a chapter and another sticky says at least 900 words a chapter. So which is the actual limit?

 

[SBaby]

@ Rise of the Elite (up to ch.5)

-I am personally never too thrilled to have the narrator doing the "interesting jobs" of annoucing who got the hots for who. It just make things dull. I suppose that we can possibly call this a direct sequel to the anime in order to justify for the claim that Drew got a crush on May (as everything needs to be explained, or hinted that it'll be explained in the future, directly or indirectly), but regardless readers should be able to find some way within this fanfic, without the anime, that Drew does have something for May. A hinting of a change of color on Drew's face when Drew is telling Ash that May is still not back yet, or a small sign of being upset when Ash rushes out to look for May can possibly solve all problems.

-overall the narrator is just a bit... dull o.o; It's a good thing that the narrator dealt with everything it had to very clearly, but now we can start to have the narrator take on multiple roles, occassionally siding with the character it is describing and so on ^^

-if Chezni really "passed out" due to all that happened, then all the things that he is capable of doing are very abnormally calm then o.o; Also, Chezni goes on to take the test while he is perfectly aware that he does not have amnesia is also very abnormal (oh look there's these freaks with strange creatures called Pokemon trying to put a few suction cups on you from a machine! That's certainly very safe! Just to give a bit of icing on the cake, let's tell these people that I'm from another planet! No way will they lock me up in a cage for experimental purposes ^^)

-watch out for incomplete sentences

-put the most important ideas at the end, not in the middle. " 'What's next?' she thought" can simply be "What's next?" as it serves the purpose, and in fact adding in "she thought" weakens the tone.

-a little contradiction occured when Lance is questioning Chezni if he's alive due to luck... in Chezni's earlier narration, he sounded like he considered himself to be rather fortunate, while with Lance he was giving himself the credit that his skill saved him.

-physics notes: riiiight... jumping down from a height of 2000 feet, accelerating at 9.81m/s even if you spread out your limbs (which really doesn't slow you down by that much al all in comparison to the great gravitational pull), pulling on a Beautifly's wing will not snap immediately but instead last long enough until it's 20 feet above the ground ;p Yeah... even if Beautifly's muscles (err... or tissue strength) is enough to whip up a gust/small tornado, doubt that it can resist someone accelerating downward since a height of 2000 ft like that XD. It makes the story sound silly when all there are all these scientific buildup with fancy vocabs, then screw up on the physics later ^^;;

Characterization omitted for now due to the fact that the story is still in the shallow ends of the introduction, where the characters are still being introduced (along with the physical description stuff) and haven't yet began in character development.

Grammar Basics: 9/10
Characterization: omit/20
Coherence/Readability: 9/10
Tone/Structure: 15/20
Diction: 15/20
Effort/Originality: 15/20
Lit. Device bonus: +1 (oxymoron)

Total: 64/80 => 80/100

Oh boy, are the characters still in the introduction... You're right about that.

But, I'm glad I finally have a review up here. Thanks. (80 out of 100... I wish I got grades that good in English class...)

And rest assured, I will take this advice, especially about the 2000 feet thing. (I meant for it to be 200 but I must have added an extra zero. But I still might be able to make it work with this.)

Oh, and you might have noticed, but the second chapter, where they explained the crash was a bit of an in-joke referring to Boondock Saints.

Boyish crush... Yeah I probably could have worded that one better... But you are right. This is a near/distant-future Pokemon Fic.

 

[Lily]

Fishie...LOL cute! *goes to read it*

About Dani's question - The limit should be legitimate enough. I use my common sense to figure out what a chapter should be. >_>; For example, you can't have ten words for a chapter, now could you? There isn't no exact 'limit...' but 500 sounds good enough for me.

 

[Furaigon]

Well the first chapter of my fic is 458 words which is why I was asking. But the second chapter (OMG I actually finished it!) is 648 words so it's getting longer. ^_^

 

[Raichu Master]

Tis I again...to try another fanfic. It started out ok...then it went down hill, I don't like it...but I'm going to stick through it and hope for the best. Unlike my last fanfic I tryed, where I quit in the beginning of it.

heh...sorry I have a cold, and I start rambling when I'm sick... :\

 

[Frostweaver]

@ The One Drop

-every phrase of a sentence can only have 1 verb or else it's a run-on sentence, and a sentence with 4 verbs in the same phrase is called a massive collision of verbs in the same squishy sentence.

-err... Mari addresses to the man known as "Mari's father" by the narrator as grandpa o.o; what's with that? Maybe that was directed at Wattson, but if that is true, then you'll also end up running into the confusion of Spencer being Wattson as well which is of course not making any sense... have to clear up what line is directly at who there in that section. It's terribly confusing at the moment.

-also watch out for the usage of "... and me" and "... and I." When you're using it as a subject, go with "I." Otherwise, use "... and me."

he bare white walls had been stripped of decoration, the bed against the back wall was neatly made, the night stand had a single glass of water on it, several boxes were stacked up against the wooden dresser, the wooden desk and chair had been stripped of personal items, and the miniature refrigerator in the kitchen area at the front of the room was barren.

"technically" that is grammatically correct, but really it's not very acceptable. It is unnecessarily long, and it got many chances for you to break up the sentence into a few smaller sentences as well. Also, a slight repetition in using wooden on the same line. Adjectives are most efficient if they aren't used so often and close to each other.

-"Mari's Mom" shouldn't be a proper noun ^^; M doesn't need to be capitalized. Mom is definitely not a proper noun... "Mari's mom" is just a simple noun with a possessive.

-change "you" to "one" in order to keep the narration in 3rd person ^^;

-I dunno... "Yeah!", "wow!" and those types of excited onometopia doesn't sound like something that'll come from a "shy" Pokemon ^^;

-up to ch.2 now and have to go... i'll read the rest later ^^;

 

[Geometric-sama]

For a chapter limit, isn't the guideline just as long as a piece of string? I mean, just have it as long as it needs to be. Sometimes it's really effective to have a one-paragraph chapter, just for the particular kind of flow you want in that story.

And Frosty, you know the SoE links in your sig? My username has an underscore in it... :P Also, don't forget auxiliary verbs :P

 

[Frostweaver]

Wish I can fix it but then the new character limit cut makes it so I can't edit my sig anymore without cutting it down to 1500 characters... and stupid thing counts the color codes and fonts and etc etc as part of the characters too ><; I don't know what to take out to edit the sig ;_;

Of course there is no definite rule, but those guidelines are written for *beginners.* It's just like how in elementary school we're taught the word "because" and we were permitted to say "Because it is good." Then later, you aren't permitted to use because as the first word of a sentence because you'll write incomplete sentences (which is NOT TRUE but assumed as TRUE). Finally, once you learn the structure of a sentence in phrases, you'll finally be allowed to use because as the first word of a sentence once more.

Same thing applies to a character limit for a chapter... at first you don't know, so we give you some "assumed truths." Finally when you get the flow of your own story, feel free to write as long or short as you want ^^

 

[Aiya Quackform]

@ The One Drop

-every phrase of a sentence can only have 1 verb or else it's a run-on sentence, and a sentence with 4 verbs in the same phrase is called a massive collision of verbs in the same squishy sentence.

-err... Mari addresses to the man known as "Mari's father" by the narrator as grandpa o.o; what's with that? Maybe that was directed at Wattson, but if that is true, then you'll also end up running into the confusion of Spencer being Wattson as well which is of course not making any sense... have to clear up what line is directly at who there in that section. It's terribly confusing at the moment.

-also watch out for the usage of "... and me" and "... and I." When you're using it as a subject, go with "I." Otherwise, use "... and me."



"technically" that is grammatically correct, but really it's not very acceptable. It is unnecessarily long, and it got many chances for you to break up the sentence into a few smaller sentences as well. Also, a slight repetition in using wooden on the same line. Adjectives are most efficient if they aren't used so often and close to each other.

-"Mari's Mom" shouldn't be a proper noun ^^; M doesn't need to be capitalized. Mom is definitely not a proper noun... "Mari's mom" is just a simple noun with a possessive.

-change "you" to "one" in order to keep the narration in 3rd person ^^;

-I dunno... "Yeah!", "wow!" and those types of excited onometopia doesn't sound like something that'll come from a "shy" Pokemon ^^;

-up to ch.2 now and have to go... i'll read the rest later ^^;

Small venting note: UGH!!! I just spent twenty minutes typing this reply, and my glitchy, retarded computer just up and deleted it out of nowhere! ARGH!!! Re-typed reply:

I really appreciate your notes on some of my descriptions, forstweaver. I've really been focusing a lot on developing my description-writing skills, and I am better, but not in time for this chapter. ^_^;

-err... Mari addresses to the man known as "Mari's father" by the narrator as grandpa o.o; what's with that? Maybe that was directed at Wattson, but if that is true, then you'll also end up running into the confusion of Spencer being Wattson as well which is of course not making any sense... have to clear up what line is directly at who there in that section. It's terribly confusing at the moment.

I just re-read the chapter, and I can't see what you're talking about! Could you please quote the section of the chapter you're refering to?

Also, you should have read the original version of this chapter! It was two and a half chapters!! (Don't ask how, just believe and picture a totally useless and long battle.) I spent weeks re-writing and tweaking the first few chapters, and believe me when I say that they're much better, but I was never really satisfied with the first chapter and a half. After awhile, I just had to move on or else I'd be stuck until I got totally bored with the series and gave up. I don't really feel that the fic hits its stride until Mari meets Atzie, and the really good plot points come up around Chapter 8-ish. (Not sure yet, I'm still editting!)

In any event, once the series is finished, I plan to go back and polish it off, including fixing some of my descriptions. (I totally agree with you on the description of Mari's room, and there are a couple later that are good description-wise, but constitute small breaks in the action.)

 

[Strawberry Delcatty]

Added chapter 18 of Hoenn Mirror World. Enjoy!

 

[Geometric-sama]

*hugs Frosty* YOU FIXED MY NAME! YOU FIXED IT! YOU FIXED IT! *runs around*

 

[O]

Pok?mon Chaos Black- The Novel is up. RAWR.

 

[Flatulus]

It would be nice if someone read my Fan fic Destiny of Understanding as it is now up to chapter three and has had only one person putting up an opinion of it... I know it isn't the best fic here but surely it isn't bad enough to not be worth anyone, except LilyPichu, reading it.

 

[Frostweaver]

Going to be away for awhile again due to the upcoming Chinese New Year, which means that I'll be busy going to dinners to celebrate and making too many long distance phones to call relatives back in Hong Kong and etc etc... obviously, the chem test and the 2 bio labs really do not help o.o;

Until the Chinese New Year fad is over then >>; no reviews

(not to mention present making for valentines day... <3)

 

[Geometric-sama]

*wonders if you'd mind reviewing my fic "Ridiculous" once you're back*

My mum called her family last night. No more of that for us, I think. Unless my dad calls his family. :P

 

[rubyrulez]

Well, Chapter 7 of Pokemon: Lento Legends is now up. Hopefully all of the edits I'm making will make it the least bit better this time around...

 

[Geometric-sama]

Well, two of my new fanfics are up. I wrote them very quickly; one's a sequel to the other.

 

[SBaby]

I just wanted to say that Rise of the Elite will be taking a vacation. Our computer is on the fritz and we have to send it in, and they project two weeks for the repairs.

However, I will be back and so will my Fic, since I plan on finishing it and then redoing my original. It will probably end up being better than it is now.

 

[Strawberry Delcatty]

I noticed that I've been getting a little lazy, so, starting tomorrow, I decided to bring back my daily updates for HMW. I know it'll be a lot, but at least a lot of you will be able to get the chance to check out the sequel quickly.

 

[Ry Nephthys]

Hello, everyone, Ry reporting.

I have an Adventure/Humor novel up called Sunfire & Mudburn, which is about a carefree Dragonair, Mudburn, and an intelligent female Ninetales, Sunfire. Read as these two journey to the Cerulean Cape for one purpose...Tee hee! Comments, suggestions, and reviews are accepted in the story's thread. Thanks!