If Pikachu Could Talk..What would he say?

[Empty Pot]

-Pikachu wakes up in a PokeCenter-
Ash, this is why we can't be friends -.-

 

[Star★Seeker]

Pikachu: *fancy, british accent* My gosh, Ash, my dear friend! Please stop your incessant buffoonery, I beg of you, as well as your apparent ignorance to the effectiveness of my attacks against the Ground-Type Pokemon. And no, I will not aim for the horn again.

That is all.

 

[PokeJesus]

if pikachu could talk it would say

"im a gay little ass raper, enjoy my homosexual uselessness!!!!!"

 

[Johnny590]

Pikachu: Hey, Ash! As you haven't "made a move" for the past ten years, can I hit on all the girls that follow you around?
Ash: What is a "girl"???
Pikachu: You know: Misty, May, Dawn...
Ash: Who are these names???
Pikachu: They have been following you in your journeys, for Arceus' sake!!!
Ash: Really? I don't remember them. I only remember Brock...

Swear to God, I was going to put something like this.

LMAO...so freaking true, more on Misty's sake than May or Dawn.

I could see Pikachu saying
"Dangit, Ash! You missed another legendary! You've already met, battled with, and gained the trust of, what, all of them!? >:/ get something besides me to do your dirty work."

"Bounce me hard, Buneary."

"Dangit Ash, its been months... no, years since you change your shirt... pants..."

"No, Ash, just let Team Rocket have me, they'd take better care"
"Y'know, I'd like to be released like Charizard or something... would I ever return? Uh... Sure?"
"Ash, get a girlfriend. Hopefully, one with a female Pikachu, for your best buddy?"
"For christs sake! You can see the Team Rocket logo on their shirts! How dumb are you?!"

^ These made me LMAO so hard, I woke up my dog sleeping on my lap....XD

I have only one. I ripped this off from some sort of show, or movie that I don't know the name of. Conversation is not mine. This is just what I think he would say. Where Pikachu gets annoyed at Ash.

"What isn't no country I heard of!" - Pikachu. "They speak English in what?"

"What?" -Ash

"English mother ******, do you speak it!?" -Pikachu.

"What's going on?" -Dawn. Pikachu jumps on Dawn with electricity surging on his cheeks.

"Say, what, again! Say what one more god **** time! I dare you, I double dare you!" -Pikachu, about to electrocute Dawn

"What?" -Brock. "I'm sorry, I was too busy fantasising about Nurse Joy."

(That is what I think Pikachu would say, seriously.)

^ That dialogue sequence is from Pulp Fiction, even though you did it HORRIBLY wrong, it was pretty funny....hahahahahahaaaaa

Now it's my turn:

"Hey Ash, uh....what level am I again?"
"Hey Ash, I'm getting tired of using Thunderbolt every [censored] time on Team Rocket. It's been what now, 9 seasons and 11 movies?"
"Are you ever going to hit on Misty?"
"Can somebody tell Brock that no one can see his [censored] eyes?"
"Just because I know Iron Tail doesn't mean it's the solution to every freaking battle I'm in!!"

lol.

 

[Gewitterdrache27]

Pikachu's (14 year old boy's) voice:
Ash, you are SUCH a moron!
Give that thunderstone to me the RIGHT way!
Why don't you evolve your other pokemon?
Are you using your skull to store old rags or what?
I'm sick of having to talk to other pokemon for you.
Why do you always use me? Why can't I rest every once in a while?

 

[*Charizard*]

Pikachu would say

"I have a sore ass."

 

[Sweet Smoochum]

Pikachu: Ash! What the bloody hell is the matter with you? Don't let Misty leave!
Ash: What? Why?
Pikachu: Can't you tell she's into you?!
Ash: What? No, she isn't. She just wanted her bike back.
Pikachu: No, you airhead! She was crying because she wanted to stay with you!
Ash: How do you know?
Pikachu. Trust me, I know. I've read her diaries.
Ash: You mean she really likes me?
Pikachu: Yes! Duh!!!! Get her back. Run after her if you have to. Don't let her go. Who cares about her dumb sisters? Let Misty travel with us to Hoenn. We can get Tracey to run her gym for her. He could use his Marill.
Ash: MISTY!!! Come back! Travel with us!
Misty: Okay.
Ash: Will you be my girlfriend?
Misty: *Blush* Sure!

(That's how it should have happened. XD I think if Pikachu spoke, he would have told Ash that Misty likes him and they could have stayed together.)

 

[Johnny590]

Pikachu: Ash! What the bloody hell is the matter with you? Don't let Misty leave!
Ash: What? Why?
Pikachu: Can't you tell she's into you?!
Ash: What? No, she isn't. She just wanted her bike back.
Pikachu: No, you airhead! She was crying because she wanted to stay with you!
Ash: How do you know?
Pikachu. Trust me, I know. I've read her diaries.
Ash: You mean she really likes me?
Pikachu: Yes! Duh!!!! Get her back. Run after her if you have to. Don't let her go. Who cares about her dumb sisters? Let Misty travel with us to Hoenn. We can get Tracey to run her gym for her. He could use his Marill.
Ash: MISTY!!! Come back! Travel with us!
Misty: Okay.
Ash: Will you be my girlfriend?
Misty: *Blush* Sure!

(That's how it should have happened. XD I think if Pikachu spoke, he would have told Ash that Misty likes him and they could have stayed together.)

lol Yeah...and to think Ash traveled with Misty for 3 whole seasons and when she decided to leave he said "Hey Misty, you finally got your bike back!!" <---- What a dumb@$$....-__-

Other Pikachu lines:

"Hey Ash, isn't it about time I learn something other than Iron Tail, Volt Tackle and Thunderbolt?"
"Your going on ANOTHER adventure? Dude, do you ever take a break!?!?"
"How old are you supposed to be again?"
"Hey, I talked to Paul's Pokemon. They told me to tell you that you suck as a trainer."
"Hey Ash, you promised Pidgeot you'd come back one day. But seeing how you got Swellow, Noctowl and Staraptor now, I don't think that's happening. Birds have feelings, you know."

 

[Sweet Smoochum]

lol Yeah...and to think Ash traveled with Misty for 3 whole seasons and when she decided to leave he said "Hey Misty, you finally got your bike back!!" <---- What a dumb@$$....-__-

Other Pikachu lines:

"Hey Ash, isn't it about time I learn something other than Iron Tail, Volt Tackle and Thunderbolt?"
"Your going on ANOTHER adventure? Dude, do you ever take a break!?!?"
"How old are you supposed to be again?"
"Hey, I talked to Paul's Pokemon. They told me to tell you that you suck as a trainer."
"Hey Ash, you promised Pidgeot you'd come back one day. But seeing how you got Swellow, Noctowl and Staraptor now, I don't think that's happening. Birds have feelings, you know."

(@ the comment in bold) Lol What? XD haha (Ash wasn't too bright in those days. XD)

Pikachu: Yo, Brock. Get over here.
Brock: What is it, Pikachu?
Pikachu: I've noticed you've been having trouble with the ladies.
Brock: Wow really? 10 years and you just noticed?
Pikachu: If you didn't have an attitude with me just now, I could have given you this great pick up line. I guess you don't want to know it now.
Brock: Oh come on, buddy. Please, tell me.
Pikachu: *whisper whisper.*
Brock: Okay. I'll go tell Nurse Joy.

Brock: Hey, baby. I'll show you my Squirtle but first I'll have to take a Pikachu.
Nurse Joy: You sick man. *slap* *walks away*
Brock: Pikachu!?! Why did you tell me to say that?
Pikachu: What? It works for me all the time. *Thinks to himself: (That's what you get for not bringing Misty back with you. You made her think that Ash was going to Hoenn all by himself. Then, you come back and you don't invite Misty. How dare you. Go back to Professor Ivy.)*

Other things Pikachu might say:

"Are you crazy? I'm not going to battle this Onix. You battle it. Go! Ash! Use Wimpy kick!"

Lol XD

"Isn't it obvious that they're Team Rocket? You only know if it's them if you hear Meowth speak. Arceus, you guys aren't bright at all."

Jessie, James, & Meowth: "Hey! Quit mocking us!"

"Not you. I'm talking about Ash and his posse."

 

[Cherrim]

I would say this is more of an anime thread so I'm tossing it over there. :/

 

[Mew~]

"I'm a girl, damnit!"

XDD I can see it saying that.​

he cant be a girl because girl pikachus have heart shaped tails

 

[Super Puppy]

"That's Team Rocket you morons! How can you not see through those pathetic disguises? They've done this hundreds of times!"

-Pikachu to Ash and co.

 

[Pichufan17]

1. "Ash you can't do anything right"
2. "Team Rocket are morons"
3. "It's my off day"

 

[Johnny590]

(@ the comment in bold) Lol What? XD haha (Ash wasn't too bright in those days. XD)

Pikachu: Yo, Brock. Get over here.
Brock: What is it, Pikachu?
Pikachu: I've noticed you've been having trouble with the ladies.
Brock: Wow really? 10 years and you just noticed?
Pikachu: If you didn't have an attitude with me just now, I could have given you this great pick up line. I guess you don't want to know it now.
Brock: Oh come on, buddy. Please, tell me.
Pikachu: *whisper whisper.*
Brock: Okay. I'll go tell Nurse Joy.

Brock: Hey, baby. I'll show you my Squirtle but first I'll have to take a Pikachu.
Nurse Joy: You sick man. *slap* *walks away*
Brock: Pikachu!?! Why did you tell me to say that?
Pikachu: What? It works for me all the time. *Thinks to himself: (That's what you get for not bringing Misty back with you. You made her think that Ash was going to Hoenn all by himself. Then, you come back and you don't invite Misty. How dare you. Go back to Professor Ivy.)*

Other things Pikachu might say:

"Are you crazy? I'm not going to battle this Onix. You battle it. Go! Ash! Use Wimpy kick!"

Lol XD

"Isn't it obvious that they're Team Rocket? You only know if it's them if you hear Meowth speak. Arceus, you guys aren't bright at all."

Jessie, James, & Meowth: "Hey! Quit mocking us!"

"Not you. I'm talking about Ash and his posse."

^LMAO.....The Team Rocket joke is so true....

Pikachu conversations with some of Ash's Pokemon:

Pikachu: So Squirtle, how is the Squirtle squad holding up?
Squirtle: Are you [censored] me? I'm bored out of my shell!! All I do is use Water Gun over and over and over again....
Pikachu: You aren't the only one that thinks like that....Do you know how many times I use Thunderbolt?
Squirtle: Oh, quit whining. At least you get to travel to different regions and meet new Pokemon. I'm stuck with the same guys I met since my debut!!

Pikachu: Hey Grotle, how's it feel to be totally different?
Grotle: Why do you ask?
Pikachu: Well, I've basically stayed the same and have never evolved....
Grotle: Honestly? This sucks. I can barely move at all, and my move set ain't exactly the best one for my current physical condition.
Pikachu: Well, Ash isn't too bright...
Grotle: Yeah, shouldn't I know Mega Drain or Synthesis by now?

Pikachu: Hey, Snorlax!!
Snorlax: zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Pikachu: Why are you always sleeping?
Snorlax: *wakes up for a second* You ever ask me that again and I am going to Ice Punch you so hard your going to land in the next region
Pikachu: ......
Snorlax: zzzzzzzzzzzz

Pikachu: Hi, Bayleef!!
Bayleef: Hey Pikachu, how are you?
Pikachu: Ash loves me more than he does you.
Bayleef: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


lol that's all I can think of for now...

 

[Empty Pot]

Pikachu: Hi, Bayleef!!
Bayleef: Hey Pikachu, how are you?
Pikachu: Ash loves me more than he does you.
Bayleef: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

That would happen to. Poor Bayleef ):

 

[Azumi]

"I'm a girl, damnit!"​

​

This. XD

he cant be a girl because girl pikachus have heart shaped tails​

Pikachu was introduced in Generation 1. If it suddenly had a heart-shaped tail, it would be strange, so they didn't give Pikachu one.

 

[MegaKirby]

Well Pikachu probably would be saying something in Japanese and, sense I only know how to say hello in Japanese, I really can't tell you what it would say. XD

 

[Ponyta]

"You know, I have more moves to use than thunderbolt"

 

[raekuul]

"'Where's my ribbon?' Wait, this is the wrong script..."

 

[iLaxbe!]

Actually, Pikachu can talk. But the little thing's brain is so small that all he can say is "Pika", "Pi" and its own name.

Miserable..