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Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted

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Granted, but you're stuck in the real world.

I wish I had some caffeine.
 
Granted, but now your hopelessly addicted.

I wish for cheat codes for the real world.
 
That would be helpful if you didnt already fail so much that you had a cheat barrier on life cause your life is at -1.

Anyway uh i wish for the girl i love to have not done all this to me and to have just gone out with me in the first place and not make me go through this torturous hell i feel.
 
granted, but it's only a custodial job and there is no chance of promotions available.

I wish for a key lime cheesecake that creates a perfect world, for me and those I choose, to live in after I eat it.
 
Granted. It tastes horrible and for order for its effect to work, you need to eat all of it. Btw, it's also the current world record holder for largest l i e cake.

I wish for tomorrow not to come.
 
Granted. However, around the same time you take the cap off the glue stick, your parents come into the room and become super paranoid for some reason and think you're sniffing glue. Months of unneeded therapy and rehab ensue.

I wish for a figgy pudding.
 
Granted but you throw up right after you eat it.


I wish I was still in Disney.
 
Granted, but you get eaten by rabid sharks.

I wish I was Konata.
(If you don't know who she is, look it up.)
 
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