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The Post Your Problems Thread

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Fireworks said:
At school tomorrow, I have to do a talk in front of all my English class. I was supposed to do it today, but I got too nervous and asked to do it tomorrow instead. The thing is...I just don't have the confidence to do it, and it's important because it is a third of my final English grade. What should I do?
Click to expand...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upniIg29Tcc
Study this, and study hard.
 
That has nothing to do with anything, and studying is not what I'm talking about...I said I have a confidence problem, I find it hard enough to talk to one person, let alone a class of 20-30. When I was supposed to do it today, I felt sick and my mind went completely blank.
 
It was a joke.. XD;

Here's some advice from someone who speaks publicly A LOT. Pick a person out of the crowd that you know (ie a friend) and present your speech or whatever it is to that one person. It helps a lot for me.
 
_Dean_ said:
It was a joke.. XD;

Here's some advice from someone who speaks publicly A LOT. Pick a person out of the crowd that you know (ie a friend) and present your speech or whatever it is to that one person. It helps a lot for me.
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Oh xD

...I have none :\
Again, due to lack of confidence.
 
インフェルノの津波 said:

Anyway, I have my own problems. You see...I have a surgery coming up, apparently I have premature bone growth in my nose, so they're going to basically cut open my face/nose, and I have the choice on whether to do it or not. I have 3 days to decide, so what should I do?
Click to expand...

I don't really want to make you decide, but it could be for your own good if you want things to be easier. Prevention is key to a better life. Are you concerned about side-effects or after-surgery effects?

Fireworks said:
At school tomorrow, I have to do a talk in front of all my English class. I was supposed to do it today, but I got too nervous and asked to do it tomorrow instead. The thing is...I just don't have the confidence to do it, and it's important because it is a third of my final English grade. What should I do?
Click to expand...

Sooner or later you're gonna HAVE to speak in public, and do it a lot frequently than what you will do. Hey, we all done it, and we were nervous, but we got used to it. Lemme give you some tips: practice with a friend. Practice in front of your mirror. If you want feedback, practice with your parents. They are likely to tell you what you should say during the presentation and what you shouldn't. Don't bail out like you did today. It'll likely hurt your grade even more.
 
There's this guy I liked since 1st grade, and I told him how I felt and he said 'I can accept that.' That actually made me laugh hysterically. xD Well anyway, he told me he has a crush on my best friend, and she likes him too. (He doesn't know) And like a month later, one of my friends asks him out and he says yes. But later she told him it was actually a dare, but if he still wants to she would go out with him. He said he did it only so he wouldn't hurt her feelings so they were chill. A week later he asks out the most popular girl in the school, but she says no... So I was thinking if I should ask him out... But I'm afraid my best friend would be sad, and I know how it feels.... D:
 
Hmm...not sure on how to say this, but here it goes:

Spoiler:
 
trespasser said:
There's this guy I liked since 1st grade, and I told him how I felt and he said 'I can accept that.' That actually made me laugh hysterically. xD Well anyway, he told me he has a crush on my best friend, and she likes him too. (He doesn't know) And like a month later, one of my friends asks him out and he says yes. But later she told him it was actually a dare, but if he still wants to she would go out with him. He said he did it only so he wouldn't hurt her feelings so they were chill. A week later he asks out the most popular girl in the school, but she says no... So I was thinking if I should ask him out... But I'm afraid my best friend would be sad, and I know how it feels.... D:
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Hmm, reminds me of a guy I liked since high school, but anyways... I think it's better for you to be friends with the guy (if you have not done so). Talk to the guy & spark a convo. Look for some things you have in common.

It's also better for you to talk one-on-one with your best friend about the guy. If she gives you the ok, then I'd say go for it. It doesn't hurt to talk.
 
trespasser said:
There's this guy I liked since 1st grade, and I told him how I felt and he said 'I can accept that.' That actually made me laugh hysterically. xD Well anyway, he told me he has a crush on my best friend, and she likes him too. (He doesn't know) And like a month later, one of my friends asks him out and he says yes. But later she told him it was actually a dare, but if he still wants to she would go out with him. He said he did it only so he wouldn't hurt her feelings so they were chill. A week later he asks out the most popular girl in the school, but she says no... So I was thinking if I should ask him out... But I'm afraid my best friend would be sad, and I know how it feels.... D:
Click to expand...

Best thing would be to talk to your friend. Ages and ages ago when I had this problem with my mate, we just talked it over. He, funnily enough, liked someone else too, so he was happy to let me ask this girl out. And it all worked out fine.
Talk to you friend about it.​
​

インフェルノの津波 said:
Hmm...not sure on how to say this, but here it goes:

Spoiler:
Click to expand...

How to change it? Well, I highly doubt advice from us will change anything. Are you are School/College/University?
If so, work your butt off. Get an amazing degree and don't stop.

You have a job?
Always be on time, never slack off, always be helpful.

It is a matter of changing your attitude to the world.​
​
 
(how the heck did i end up here :P) anyways, hey... i don't know if this is okay with the post rules but... ive given up on love. I just don't believe in it anymore... I was with a girl in a distance relationship and well of course she cheated and all those things but its not that what bothers me... what does is the fact that all my female friends tell me i'm an amazing person and i'm great and i'm one in a million blah blah blah but.. i dont get it... if i am like that then why.. why is it that i've been alone (alone when it comes to a girlfriend) for 19 years of my life? why did my "ex" cheated on me like that on me if she knew me? I don't get it... if i'm so great (one of my friends lives near my country and fell in love with me for example) and if im so "unique".. then why.. why is it that nobody wants me as something more than their friend... I've always thought that my fate is to be alone forever and lately its not changing at all...
 
maybe you just don't spark their interest. But you wouldn't know about boy/girlfriend stuff from the day you're born onwards for a few years.
 
Devil's Guitarist said:
(how the heck did i end up here :P) anyways, hey... i don't know if this is okay with the post rules but... ive given up on love. I just don't believe in it anymore... I was with a girl in a distance relationship and well of course she cheated and all those things but its not that what bothers me... what does is the fact that all my female friends tell me i'm an amazing person and i'm great and i'm one in a million blah blah blah but.. i dont get it... if i am like that then why.. why is it that i've been alone (alone when it comes to a girlfriend) for 19 years of my life? why did my "ex" cheated on me like that on me if she knew me? I don't get it... if i'm so great (one of my friends lives near my country and fell in love with me for example) and if im so "unique".. then why.. why is it that nobody wants me as something more than their friend... I've always thought that my fate is to be alone forever and lately its not changing at all...
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Story of my life. At least once a day am I asked "why don't you have a girlfriend!?!?! You're exactly the boy every girl dreams of!! blah blah BLAAAH" T__T

Here's what I gather, dude. This whole "uniqueness" factor is actually killing us. Girls see this guy that's so good -- it's too good. They're afraid of it. They think that they are going to be sucked into this was too good to be true fantasy that when they are let down it's going to suck extra horribly bad.

That's one assumption. This may not be the same for you or it is and you don't realize it, but part of my uh... "romantic nature" is that I tend to come on too strong. =P That's a major turn off for a lot of girls (and guys, if any girls are reading). It's pretty hard for me but I still manage to do it and though I haven't got a girlfriend yet I definitely know its helping my reputation, but whenever I'm near a girl I 1) think is "attractive" or 2) already have feelings for, I back the **** off. Especially if she's your friend, then you're already in so stop trying so dang hard. In fact, trying too hard is exactly what get's us thrown in the friend zone because your attempts end up making her feel really close to you "as my friend". T__T
Once you're friends, kick it chill-mode 3000.
 
Well, there's a girl in my class, who I like, and I think likes me back (but my intuition sucks).
I am probably the worlds worst small talker, like it's easy for me to talk to a mate, or someone who I know reasonably well, but when it comes to talking to people casually, I suck.
I was wondering if you guys and girls have had that problem, and how you've over come it.
 
xCalierz said:
Well, there's a girl in my class, who I like, and I think likes me back (but my intuition sucks).
I am probably the worlds worst small talker, like it's easy for me to talk to a mate, or someone who I know reasonably well, but when it comes to talking to people casually, I suck.
I was wondering if you guys and girls have had that problem, and how you've over come it.
Click to expand...

Well, it is all about confidence, obviously.
There is no 'cure' to it, per-say. It is just about taking a deep breath and doing it. First off, maybe start by just smiling at her and saying hi. See how she reacts, then you can go from there.

If I am honest, that is what I do. I always watch how they react to my first comment.​
​
 
Girl problems .. can anyone help?

Okay there are many little things specific to my situation but I'll try to sum it up mostly. There's this girl I like and she has feelings towards me too, but we aren't dating officially.

I meant to text something to my friend about how I keep blowing good chances with this girl, but I accidentally texted it to her (I used her name in the message), and there's no mistaking what I wrote in the text, like no way to get around it and pass it off as an accident/prank.

Why this is bad is that it gives her so much power over me, and it also makes it look like I've liked her this whole time and was too scared to ask her out.

So any ideas? I've heard a lot of mixed opinions and am not quite sure what would be the best thing to do.
 
Did she reply to it? And did you send another message informing her it was an accident? Or did you both avoid talking about it?

i think girls are more afraid to ask to date than men are, so if you clearly stated you wanted to date her in the message, and she didn't ask you anything or say she wanted to confess her part too, then she's probably trying to avoid hurting you. ): i can't say for sure, and its probably not something you want to hear, but she may be not interested, if that's the case...
 
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