Percy Thrillington
The Mad Hatter
- 4,424
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Seen Jan 1, 2023
Three most annoying Pokémon of all time:
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Zigzagoon: I swear, if there is anything that made your third generation games a disappointment, it's probably down to Zigzagoon. Not only did the fox-dog-cat-beaver creature pop up everywhere, it was also a complete waste of time battling him, because the experience points you received were not worth it at all. I don't know how many times I must've run from Zigzagoon while I played through my game, but I'm betting if I put all that time into writing a presidential victory speech, it'd end up better than Obama's.
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Zubat: Call me bias if you will, but this Pokémon here managed to secure a place in the top five by running into me in Mount Moon when I restarted my Firered a while ago. Now, I admit that by reading that sentence alone, I look like an utter prick who's so worried about his valuable time on earth that he can't stand running into a measly Zubat because it might delay him, but I assure you that this is not the case! The Pokémon I encountered was a shiny; alternately coloured; unbelievably rare. So I'm excited and happy. I'm going to catch a shiny! I whittle his hit points down a bit and it hits red a couple of seconds later. So I decided that was enough; I look in my bag to find a Poké Ball to throw at him, and I find out that I have none left. Devastated, I smash my Gameboy Advance against the wall. Havn't played Firered since. Other irritating facts about the bat is that it always attacks you at the wrong time; normally when your last Pokémon is poisoned and you need to get to a Pokémon Center.
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Mewtwo: Not necessarily one of the Pokémon you instantly hate because of its looks or its power, but moreso the amount of effort and humiliation put into catching it. After you eventually make it lose a bit of its health, it gets it back by using Recover. After that, it proceeds to reveal that it was just playing with you and destroys half of your team. Then it evades sixty Ultra Balls, so you're forced to waste a Master Ball on a Pokémon you're never going to use. Not a cool cat.
Three most useless Pokémon of all time:
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Dunsparce: Why am I posting a sprite of Dunsparce in this thread? I don't know. It doesn't make sense, does it? Why would Ken choose to create some sort of mixture of a lizard and a fish? I don't know either. It also doesn't make sense. In fact, Dunsparce's pitiful existence doesn't make sense. It can't do anything; it doesn't follow up any sort of side-quest. At all. It's only there for people to finish their PokéDex, and that's not a proper reason at all. Have you realised that every Pokémon has some sort of function? That they aren't entirely useless? Hell, Magicarp exists to evolve into Gyrados. What about Dunsparce? Nope, nothing. Easily one of the most overlooked, unloved, neglected and useless Pokémon of all time.
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Quilfish: If you ask the general Pokémon gaming population what a Quilfish is, they'll look at you blankly. And that's okay. I'm not surprised and I don't really blame them. Why? Because the Pokémon doesn't serve any sort of purpose at all. Much like Dunsparce, it only existed to be caught in swarms to show how high-tech Pokémon Gold and Silver were.
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Zigzaggon: That's right, folks. This Pokémon features on both lists? Why has it made it to the most useless as well? I advise you to read my other paragraph about it, and then stare at it for about thirty seconds. The answer should become clear eventually.
"image removed"
Zigzagoon: I swear, if there is anything that made your third generation games a disappointment, it's probably down to Zigzagoon. Not only did the fox-dog-cat-beaver creature pop up everywhere, it was also a complete waste of time battling him, because the experience points you received were not worth it at all. I don't know how many times I must've run from Zigzagoon while I played through my game, but I'm betting if I put all that time into writing a presidential victory speech, it'd end up better than Obama's.
"image removed"
Zubat: Call me bias if you will, but this Pokémon here managed to secure a place in the top five by running into me in Mount Moon when I restarted my Firered a while ago. Now, I admit that by reading that sentence alone, I look like an utter prick who's so worried about his valuable time on earth that he can't stand running into a measly Zubat because it might delay him, but I assure you that this is not the case! The Pokémon I encountered was a shiny; alternately coloured; unbelievably rare. So I'm excited and happy. I'm going to catch a shiny! I whittle his hit points down a bit and it hits red a couple of seconds later. So I decided that was enough; I look in my bag to find a Poké Ball to throw at him, and I find out that I have none left. Devastated, I smash my Gameboy Advance against the wall. Havn't played Firered since. Other irritating facts about the bat is that it always attacks you at the wrong time; normally when your last Pokémon is poisoned and you need to get to a Pokémon Center.
"image removed"
Mewtwo: Not necessarily one of the Pokémon you instantly hate because of its looks or its power, but moreso the amount of effort and humiliation put into catching it. After you eventually make it lose a bit of its health, it gets it back by using Recover. After that, it proceeds to reveal that it was just playing with you and destroys half of your team. Then it evades sixty Ultra Balls, so you're forced to waste a Master Ball on a Pokémon you're never going to use. Not a cool cat.
Three most useless Pokémon of all time:
"image removed"
Dunsparce: Why am I posting a sprite of Dunsparce in this thread? I don't know. It doesn't make sense, does it? Why would Ken choose to create some sort of mixture of a lizard and a fish? I don't know either. It also doesn't make sense. In fact, Dunsparce's pitiful existence doesn't make sense. It can't do anything; it doesn't follow up any sort of side-quest. At all. It's only there for people to finish their PokéDex, and that's not a proper reason at all. Have you realised that every Pokémon has some sort of function? That they aren't entirely useless? Hell, Magicarp exists to evolve into Gyrados. What about Dunsparce? Nope, nothing. Easily one of the most overlooked, unloved, neglected and useless Pokémon of all time.
"image removed"
Quilfish: If you ask the general Pokémon gaming population what a Quilfish is, they'll look at you blankly. And that's okay. I'm not surprised and I don't really blame them. Why? Because the Pokémon doesn't serve any sort of purpose at all. Much like Dunsparce, it only existed to be caught in swarms to show how high-tech Pokémon Gold and Silver were.
"image removed"
Zigzaggon: That's right, folks. This Pokémon features on both lists? Why has it made it to the most useless as well? I advise you to read my other paragraph about it, and then stare at it for about thirty seconds. The answer should become clear eventually.