Dizzy
My Father is a Baron!
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"You Poor People, Thats Brad Pitt" Said Kayleigh.
lol DAKOTA is BRAD PITT
lol DAKOTA is BRAD PITT
Your funny quotes...
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John Denver
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LOL, I remeber that, some people actually thought I looked like that...fr-r-r-reaky...
"There are 3 kinds of people in this world: Those who can count and those who can't."
caCO ya!
"There are 3 kinds of people in this world: Those who can count and those who can't."
caCO ya!
Frostweaver
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and Dakota goes into those who cannot count ^_^
Then again... I am too... i clicked that signature link to come to number matching game, and they insulted my intelligence and says that I need to cooldown for a second for the sake of my sanity... x_x
http://www.coxar.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/
(special note: read at own risk, political matters related)
-comments written in the above link may or may not offend your personal beliefs regarding a political matter (but very funny in the way they are telling us this matter, certainly worth reading imho)
Then again... I am too... i clicked that signature link to come to number matching game, and they insulted my intelligence and says that I need to cooldown for a second for the sake of my sanity... x_x
http://www.coxar.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/
(special note: read at own risk, political matters related)
-comments written in the above link may or may not offend your personal beliefs regarding a political matter (but very funny in the way they are telling us this matter, certainly worth reading imho)
I always love saying this: "Expecting the world to treat you fairly, because you are a good person, is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you, because you are a vegetarian."
Everyone laughed at me when I said this once, "You don't truely learn to swear at people until you learn how to drive."
You'll quickly learn how true that is later in life.
Everyone laughed at me when I said this once, "You don't truely learn to swear at people until you learn how to drive."
You'll quickly learn how true that is later in life.
John Denver
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oh yeah, people have sworn at me for my driving...shizzah...
"I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type."
~George Burns
BOO ya!
"I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type."
~George Burns
BOO ya!
John Denver
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uh...you guys can post your funny quotes to ya know
I know tis a double post but no ones posting :(
bya...
I know tis a double post but no ones posting :(
bya...
Frostweaver
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lol Dakota... bumping is illegal on PC =p
"[font=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me."
[/font]~Steve Martin
"[font=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me."
[/font]~Steve Martin
I CAN post more? Cool! Hmm ok, here's a list, yes a list of Murphy's law of combat operations. Its quite hilarious for obvious reasons, even if you're not in the military. Supposively there are 140 laws but I thought that it was too long to post. So instead I'll post the first 60:P. Its still quite a bit to chew on, but I think its funny enough for anyone to read through. If I get enough replies of anyone wanting to see the rest I will post it then, for now Enjoy.
Murphy's Law of Combat Operations:
1. Friendly fire - isn't.
2. Recoilless rifles - aren't.
3. Suppressive fires - won't.
4. You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.
5. A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.
6. If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
7. Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.
8. If at first you don't succeed, call in an air strike.
9. If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.
10. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
11. Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.
12. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
13. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
14. The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.
15. The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
a. When they're ready.
b. When you're not.
16. No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.
17. There is no such thing as a perfect plan.
18. Five second fuses always burn three seconds.
19. There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
20. A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
21. The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.
22. The easy way is always mined.
23. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
24. Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.
25. Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.
26. If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
27. When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.
28. Incoming fire has the right of way.
29. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
30. No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
31. If the enemy is within range, so are you.
32. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
33. Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.
34. Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.
35. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.
36. Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both).
37. Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.
38. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.
39. Tracers work both ways.
40. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.
41. When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.
42. Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
43. Military Intelligence is a contradiction.
44. Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.
45. Weather ain't neutral.
46. If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed towards you.
47. Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground.
48. 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go'.
49. The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.
50. Napalm is an area support weapon.
51. Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
52. B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.
53. Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.
54. Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.
55. The one item you need is always in short supply.
56. Interchangeable parts aren't.
57. It's not the one with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've got to think about.
58. When in doubt, empty your magazine.
59. The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
60. Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.
61. If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
1. Friendly fire - isn't.
2. Recoilless rifles - aren't.
3. Suppressive fires - won't.
4. You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.
5. A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.
6. If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
7. Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.
8. If at first you don't succeed, call in an air strike.
9. If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.
10. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
11. Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.
12. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
13. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
14. The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.
15. The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
a. When they're ready.
b. When you're not.
16. No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.
17. There is no such thing as a perfect plan.
18. Five second fuses always burn three seconds.
19. There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
20. A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
21. The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.
22. The easy way is always mined.
23. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
24. Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this reason, it is not at all uncommon for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.
25. Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.
26. If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
27. When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.
28. Incoming fire has the right of way.
29. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
30. No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
31. If the enemy is within range, so are you.
32. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
33. Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.
34. Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.
35. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.
36. Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both).
37. Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.
38. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.
39. Tracers work both ways.
40. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your fair share of objectives to take.
41. When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.
42. Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
43. Military Intelligence is a contradiction.
44. Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.
45. Weather ain't neutral.
46. If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed towards you.
47. Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground.
48. 'Flies high, it dies; low and slow, it'll go'.
49. The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.
50. Napalm is an area support weapon.
51. Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
52. B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.
53. Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.
54. Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.
55. The one item you need is always in short supply.
56. Interchangeable parts aren't.
57. It's not the one with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may concern" you've got to think about.
58. When in doubt, empty your magazine.
59. The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
60. Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.
61. If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
John Denver
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Heh, I found this funny one that proves Shaquille O' neals intelligence...
"I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to. "
~Shaquille O'Neal, on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece
BOO ya!
"I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to. "
~Shaquille O'Neal, on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece
BOO ya!
baby*j
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Here's one:
"You just mad because Payless ran out of plastic pumps for the after-party!"
- Missy Elliot
:P
"You just mad because Payless ran out of plastic pumps for the after-party!"
- Missy Elliot
:P
John Denver
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"Those who live by the sword...get shot by those who don't"
and a BOO ya!
and a BOO ya!
Frostweaver
Ancient + Prehistoric
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"Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla."
^_^;
^_^;
Iveechan
based on a paperclip
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"The poop has hit the fan now"
-various sources, Binky from "Shakes the Clown" comes to mind
If this has already been mentioned, then deal with it, it's because I didn't feeling like reading through the whole topic.
-various sources, Binky from "Shakes the Clown" comes to mind
If this has already been mentioned, then deal with it, it's because I didn't feeling like reading through the whole topic.
Dizzy
My Father is a Baron!
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Whoever said a Moderator's (even a super Moderator's) job is all work and no play.. Shame on you!
"Let's play, Close the thread!..... Let's Play, Ban the Flamer!" Dakota, Super Moderator
LOL Dakota is so great
"Let's play, Close the thread!..... Let's Play, Ban the Flamer!" Dakota, Super Moderator
LOL Dakota is so great
100marios
Reigning Dork Champion of PC
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- *booming voice* What authority dost though have to
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I'm surprised no one has said this one yet:
"I think, therefore I am....I think....."
Oh and this a spanish translated one: (very strange if you don't know what it means hehe)
"The donkey kicks in the front"
....hehe....it's one of those things to halp you with proper grammar. In this case it means to say yourself last when you're talking about a group. Something about you're the donkey, and if you're in front, you'll kick everyone behind you, so you say yourself last........it's best keep it in spanish hehe.......
"I think, therefore I am....I think....."
Oh and this a spanish translated one: (very strange if you don't know what it means hehe)
"The donkey kicks in the front"
....hehe....it's one of those things to halp you with proper grammar. In this case it means to say yourself last when you're talking about a group. Something about you're the donkey, and if you're in front, you'll kick everyone behind you, so you say yourself last........it's best keep it in spanish hehe.......
flygonruler1
See "flygon"page 32
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Its all fun and games till someone loses a eye.Thin its pingpong!-me
~FR~
Did someone already post that?
~FR~
Did someone already post that?
John Denver
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"It's all fun and games once someone loses an eye."
yeah, think about :P
BOO ya!
yeah, think about :P
BOO ya!
Frostweaver
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I'm sorry for my igorance, but the literature and knowledge within it are beyond that of mine...Dakota said:
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and that's the best they're going to feel all day."
Dean Martin.
This one can be either very funny, or very reflective... think about it.
I always thought the whole quote to that was: "Its all fun and games until someone loses an eye, then its hilarious!"Dakota said:
Here one that may get you all to laugh:P:
When the inventor of the drawing board messed things up...what did he go back to?
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