Serious Anyone have a cure?

[Benzaroo]

I've been diagnosed with clinical depression since I was 13, I also struggle with panic disorder and social/general anxiety. These conditions have been diagnosed by a doctor, I am taking medication for them and it helps, but I just feel so blah, does that make sense? I don't feel happy, and I don't feel sad.
I guess I've just been feeling alone lately, I don't have a lot of friends because of the social anxiety. Plus I've seen how other people treat one another and I'd rather not have my emotions played with/manipulated. So I tend to stay alone, but I crave friendship and stuff you know? I just graduated highschool in June, and I've been seeing everyone I went to school with have these amazing journeys and trips, and well I'm jealous! (I have probably over half of my graduated class on my Snapchat, because at graduation a lot of people asked, omg I was so scared, they where really nice tho?) My anxiety makes me to nervous to be a hour away from my house :/ and If I travel farther than that I get really bad panic attacks and I start getting nasua and shake real bad. I have no idea why? It just happens even on the medication. People who "know" me, know about my anxiety and stuff because we basically all went to the same middle schools as there is only two in my town, so in highschool people where either really really nice to me (like I was handicapped) or really really mean to see me start shaking and breakdown (a lot of people apologized to me senior year.) anyways enough mumbling I was just wondering if you guys had some like coping mechanism so I can start pushing myself out of my comfort zone?

 

[colours]

Hey Banzaroo! Firstly, I think you're really brave in say something to get your thoughts out there. I do want to caution, however: regardless of the advice that's offered in this thread, your best advice would always continue to come from a qualified mental health professional. At the end of the day, while some of us may relate to your situation, if you do indeed feel this way, you should absolutely consult your therapist (assuming you have one) and see if that helps. I know that in my experience, the right therapist can work wonders on mental health.

That said though, I understand totally where you're coming from. When depression starts to eat you from the inside, you just feel this void of emptiness inside of you. There's no happiness or sadness, there's just no satisfaction anymore in doing things that you've once enjoyed doing. That said though, I do want to ask: do you live near a public park of some sort? I ask because whenever I feel like depression is gutting me really hard, I take a trip to my local park to refresh my mind and sightsee around the city, all the while listening to calming music and just kind of people watch and look at how pretty the scenery is.

Also, I know how it feels to keep people at arm's reach simply due to hesitation that they'll hurt me. The thing is, I've learned the hard way many times over that the more I pushed people away, not only was I hurting them, I was also increasingly hurting myself. While I'm not necessarily saying to let every single person inside the walls that you put up (so to speak), sometimes it helps to consider that the people who you make friends with, if they genuinely care and are good people, won't even think about hurting you or taking advantage of you. That in itself, at the very least, helps me feel less alone. I personally take solace in knowing that my online friends are there for me in my bad days, and there's no real reason why they would do me wrong. If you feel negative thoughts causing you doubt, it helps to fight those thoughts away by asking yourself why?. Never stop asking yourself why your depression makes you think the way that you do, and you'll find that oftentimes, it's your own mind trying to cause you unreasonable doubt and push people away and cause you more and more pain.

Also honestly, I avoid social media in regards to my older high school classmates because I know I personally have a bad habit of comparing my own life circumstances to theirs. But then I have to realize that my life isn't theirs, and life isn't some sort of race or contest. A lot of my high school classmates are married and have kids and are seemingly well off, but my life circumstances aren't the same as theirs. I'm having to go through a lot more obstacles, and I think, for the most part, that's ok. I try to tell myself that I'm going to come out of it a stronger person and that's all that matters.

Unfortunately, I can't really say much about making new friends because that's something even I struggle with as far as real life goes. I get along easily with others, but keeping contact with those same people has been my biggest challenge for a while now, and that's something I'm going to actively try and work on once I return to college. I'm at the very least fortunate that I have that to lean on. In lieu of that, though? I'd try seeing if there's a local group around your area that shares the same interests you do. While I understand that the very thought is very anxiety inducing for sure, I know that personally the best way to combat the feeling of loneliness is to surround myself with a trustworthy friend circle and it starts with that first step.

That's about all the advice I can think of in regards to your situation. Don't ever think lesser of yourself for going through what you are; mental health is a right pain in the ass to deal with and even the fact that you're seeking a way out of it shows how strong you are.

 

[Benzaroo]

Wow that you so much, and no I don't have a therapist anymore because I feel as I'm doing a lot better, I just need someone who understands if that makes sense. And I'm going to try to get a trustworthy friend, my one friend just left for the marine corps bootcamp, and we've been friends since pre-k. We basically lived with each-other. She was my closest dearest friend. And I agree life isn't a race. I just worry sometimes I might be in this place forever, I've considered going back to therapy. But I'm not quite sure, I thought it was normal to feel like this?

 

[gimmepie]

Wow that you so much, and no I don't have a therapist anymore because I feel as I'm doing a lot better, I just need someone who understands if that makes sense. And I'm going to try to get a trustworthy friend, my one friend just left for the marine corps bootcamp, and we've been friends since pre-k. We basically lived with each-other. She was my closest dearest friend. And I agree life isn't a race. I just worry sometimes I might be in this place forever, I've considered going back to therapy. But I'm not quite sure, I thought it was normal to feel like this?

Hi there, speaking as someone who also struggles with a lot of this stuff - right down to difficulties leaving the house (albeit for somewhat different reasons) I totally get where you're coming from. I think that going back to a therapist you trust is honestly an excellent idea and speaking to a doctor or psychiatrist about that "bleh" feeling might not be a bad idea as it could potentially be a side-effect of you're medication.

My advice for pushing out of your comfort zone is pretty simple honesty. Make sure you're prepared. Not just mentally steeling yourself but bring things with you that you're likely to need. The second thing is to start small. Go to the very edge of where your comfort zone is now - even if it's just the end of the street (although yours is thankfully greater than that). Then go a little past it, then some more and so on and so forth and eventually you'll have greatly expanded the boundaries of that comfort zone. Lastly, don't rush and wait for good days. If you push too much too fast, you could end up setting yourself back instead and you don't want that, so don't be afraid to take it slow. Similarly, if you don't feel up to the push some days, you can take a breather for the same reasons.

Again though, I'm not an expert even if I've dealt with similar stuff. It's important that you talk all this through with a professional too. Other than that, you're always welcome to send me a PM. Best of luck.

 

[Neil Peart]

Sorry to hear this. I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder and take medicine for it every day. I know you're probably desperate for help, but please be cautious of how much stock you put in what non-professionals on the internet say regarding mental health. I know everyone says it, but you should seek some therapy. If not for therapy, I'd be an absolute wreck. I know this, because I started therapy, and stopped being a wreck. Your mileage may vary, but I put more faith in a professional than some strangers on the web.

 

[Roxas]

I suffer from severe anxiety and depression as well as a myriad of other physical disabilities and I must say, as hopeful as we get for a "cure" unfortunately there is no one, single "cure." There are treatments and coping methods - not to damper your spirit - but everyone's anxiety is caused by something different. There is not a physical cause of anxiety that is the same for everyone, so it's not like there will be a one-off cure for everyone, unfortunately.

Keeping this in mind, you just have to do your best to live with it at this point. Mental health professionals can help you find ways to reduce your anxiety, manage it when it does flare up, and possibly even provide medication that either reduce or eliminate certain symptoms. Surround yourself with supportive people and drop the ones that bring you down, and you'll find yourself a lot better off.

Good luck. I know what it's like to suffer from this.

 

[Fairy]

I hope you are feeling better, Benzaroo. There's many of us here who can relate and empathize with how you feel and while I don't have any particularly good advice (besides profession help, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and medication), you have a safe place to talk about things here if you ever need to. We're a community and we're here for you. <3