depression

[Salzorrah]

Have you experienced depression before? If so, what are your thoughts about it? Does it feel different from being sad? How do you feel when someone just says "You'll get through this, this is just a phase, don't be a wimp, etc."?

For those who hasn't experienced this, do you know someone who has? Besides the obvious "Be happy, enjoy life" suggestions, what other practical advice would you give to our depressed brethren?

This is a pretty serious topic, so this should be taken somewhat seriously.

 

[Auticorn]

I did a few years ago. I was going through a rough patch in life at the time. I've actually had depression due to my overloaded anxiety and emotions. It's a real pain in the ass. I used to self-harm as well. My last self-harm incident was when I lost both my previous hero and a good friend of mine. Yeah, I don't handle losing people very well at all. :x

However, I've been doing much better since I got back into visual kei. I've been way happier lately as well. I don't want to brag or anything, but yeah. My biggest problem is my anxiety more than it is depression. :/

 

[Omicron]

I've been depressed, yes. I suffer from major depression and anxiety and take medication for it.

It is way different from being sad. A lot of the times depression won't even be expressed through sadness. Sometimes it is expressed through anger, crippling anxiety or other emotions. What I've found most prevalent and most troublesome during my worst episodes is the inability to do stuff. The inability to get out of bed, the inability to go eat something, the inability to go outside and catch a ray of sun, the inability to talk with the people that matter to you or the people that you matter to, the inability to smile and the inability to have any positive view on life.

It is very hard to understand depression, and people really think they are helping you when telling you things like "you'll get through this" or "this is just a phase". It can be very annoying or irritating while depressed, but you later appreciate their efforts. I would still suggest to avoid telling someone who's depressed things of the kind. There are much better options.

Also, usually "be happy" or "enjoy life" are the worst kind of things you can tell someone with depression. It makes them feel like there's something wrong with them or that they aren't trying hard enough.

Talking to someone who's had a similar experience usually helps a lot. Empathy is a lot better than sympathy.

 

[Lumina]

Have you experienced depression before?

Yeah apparently I've suffered depression for a large chunk of my life, and it appears to run in the family. I also should actually be on pills for it, I was perscribed some a few months ago but I can't bring myself to take them, due to a childhood aversion to medication of that sort.

If so, what are your thoughts about it?

Having lived with it as long as I can remember, it's kinda become a part of who I am as a person, in the way it affects mood. I'm not sure how it works for others but in my case it appears to vary. Some days I can do everything and have to most fun ever and then the next day I'm considering getting rid of childhood favourite games because I can't enjoy them anymore no matter how much I try. Some days I've just decided to not get out of bed at all because I don't want to put up with life.
I'm having a bit of a difficult time wording this out, I've not talked of it before and I...don't really know that much except that everyone says I have it and it's obvious.

Does it feel different from being sad?

I don't really know enough about it to know the specific things it affects like that. I've been told my prolonged sickness and lack of motivation stem from it though so with that I'd say yeah it's different than being sad.

How do you feel when someone just says "You'll get through this, this is just a phase, don't be a wimp, etc."?

I want to hurt those people because holy shit that is in the top five things that piss me off most. Those people don't know what it's like. And if they do, that's even worse! How could someone experience that and then say it's "just a phase"? Even thinking about it right now is making me twitchy.

 

[Auticorn]

Sometimes it is expressed through crippling anxiety or other emotions.

(Sorry, I changed your answer to make it fit for me.)

That's how my depression was. It was more or less due to my crippling anxiety and overloaded emotions. It was so bad that I literally wanted to just die. I couldn't handle the amount of stress I was constantly under. It was hurting me so much. I would constantly due certain behaviors I wouldn't normally do such as head-banging. I also used to self-harm all of the time. It wasn't in a sense where I wanted to bleed. I just took a tack and scraped at my skin until it left a painful mark on my wrist. :/

It got to the point where it was interfering with my daily life. I couldn't write, listen to music... or anything because I just felt so overloaded and depressed all at the same time I guess. It was the most awful feeling ever, and all I wanted was for it to go away. I used to also think very badly of myself. If I would hurt other people or piss them off or something, I would beat on myself, call myself a monster and sob really hard. It was just the worst feeling ever. I always thought of myself as being a failure at the time.

For a while, I did go into a slight state of depression. It wasn't the kind I mentioned above, but in an extent where I didn't know who I was. It started not long after getting out of a relationship after my ex left Facebook without even telling me it was over then losing my friends not long after... only to realize they were fake. Now that I'm back into visual kei and have my hero Takeru to look up to, things are getting better for me now. I have some pretty amazing friends and the greatest boyfriend/soul mate in the world. I'm grateful for the things I have, even if they aren't really perfect. I'm starting to value my life more and live it as much as I can before it's too late.

I take medication for mine as well. It's an anti-psychotic, but it helps. I have not had a single episode of depression since I started taking it. It's improved my life so much more. I'm able to do more things, or at least most things I couldn't do during that state of depression I was in.

 

[Sableye~]

After quite a long time, I finally have it (mostly) under control, which I'm really grateful for. I still have trouble from time to time, but when I do, it's nowhere near as bad. While it tends to be difficult, I still can function and deal with everyday life. (Before, I mostly would just exist when it took over. I didn't care enough to put the effort into doing things as necessary as eating.)

For me, it was particularly aggravating to be told to "cheer up" or "stop being so uptight". I'd love to be able to control my emotions, thanks. if you could teach me how, that'd be great.

 

[Sirfetch’d]

I have suffered moderate to severe depression for as long as I can remember. It's really tough dealing with it on a daily basis because you always have to have a stronger sense of self control or it will take your life over. There are days where I don't even want to get out of bed because everything is so unmotivating. I've tried speaking to my friends about it and most don't understand it but the ones who are going through the same thing are so helpful. Being able to relate to this with someone is honestly the best medicine.

 

[Meganium]

When I was 14, I suffered depression. It was really scary. I felt like I was stuck in a really dark hole, thinking you will never ever get out. I thought that the easier way to get out of it was to end my life. Thankfully, that never happened. What eventually got me out was actually the empathy a good friend of mine had shared with me. Because he also suffered through it, and he wanted to let me know that I was never alone.

 

[Raine]

The inability to get out of bed, the inability to go eat something, the inability to go outside and catch a ray of sun, the inability to talk with the people that matter to you or the people that you matter to, the inability to smile and the inability to have any positive view on life.

Defining moments when I went through about a year-long period of depression.

It started back in the summer of 2012, so the beginning of second year as a university student. I started becoming depressed once grades began to drop and that had a snowball effect in the long-run. Became unhappy with the program I was studying and eventually lost every bit of motivation. There was nothing that I wanted to do except curl up in my room, not talking to anyone with suicidal thoughts happening often. I was torn between keeping myself happy by dropping out, but also did not want to be seen as a disappointment by my parents which made decision making that much more stressful. Everything built up and I nearly envisioned what life would be like for those around me if I was suddenly gone from their lives. Would it have mattered?

Never was properly diagnosed or anything. I initially planned to after having a meeting with the campus counsellor, but even then, I was never in the mood to attend the appointment. I had a habit of cancelling plans with friends and people trying to help when I was depressed.

I've realized how important grades have contributed to my quality of life and have since thrown that concept out the window. I still try to maintain them, but I try not let myself drown in the preconceived thought that that's the most important. Also, being seen as a disappointment by those who I care about contributed to the depression and suicidal thoughts. Thankfully, I've recovered over time and the small episodes of depression have nearly stopped creeping up since getting my life back on track.

 

[Hikamaru]

I suffer depression. A lot of it in fact, because of my heavily fighting family along with the struggles of living with autism.

My brother's constant abuse towards me often caused me to become very insecure and once I even tried to inflict self-harm on myself which ended up damaging the wall which is made of plaster and isn't very sturdy. I also suffered another round of depression when I realized I wasn't fitting in with colleagues at the factory I spent around a year or so working at, because I was unable to work in a group and I was constantly feeling strained by the repetitiveness.

And now we are a low-class family with money issues that are only going to get worse because of my brother dropping out of school early and not showing any interest in studying nor working. In fact, if I end up being forced to lose the internet due to the poverty crisis (and therefore, leaving PC indefinitely if not forever) I would feel the pain the worst in the family because the internet is literally the only place I have friends right now.