[dLtMs0 v 5.4] ITT SHINJI IS CONFIRMED FOR GROSSEST; Days till Pokestick Day: check new thread

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129

I'm so confused.
 
A patient's with his doctor and he says, "Give it to me straight, doc. What's up?" The doctor grimly looks at his clipboard and sighs.

"I can't say I have anything good for you." He scratches his head. "There are two pieces of news, actually." The patient swallows with anxiety in his brow. "The first is that you have Cancer, the second is that you have Alzheimer's."

The patient wipes the sweat from his forehead and laughs. "Whew," He says wholeheartedly, "I thought you were gonna tell me that I have Cancer!"

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Yay, doctor jokes!

A man visits his doctor. As the doctor is finishing, he looks at his clipboard sadly. "I'm afraid you only have 10 to live," he says.
The man is frightened. "10 what?" he asks. "Years? Months? Days?"
The doctor then looks at his watch and says, "Nine... eight... seven..."
 
136

Why would love be more important then money? Money makes the world go around after all!

Well, money and ♥♥♥♥, but mainly money.
 
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Another expression is that "money can't buy happiness", so by that one's logic, happiness must be more valuable than money. Priceless, if you will.
 
141

"I wish you would stop staring at my breasts." said the barmaid, "You're making me uncomfortable."

"Uncomfortable?" I replied, "You want to try sitting on one of these stools with a hard on."
 
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