Fanfiction Lounge

[Gummy]

Actually, I saw that Lucifer is a good name for "light". It's only denounced 'cause of the whole Satan thing... We should be proud he wasn't named Jesus or something.

 

[FireTrainer92]

I got this fanfic and no ones posting what should I do

 

[Grovyle42(Griff8416)]

Anyways, I got a question that was inspired by Pink Parka Girl's question at Serebii forums: Does your Pokemon have different personalities on and off the battlefield? Seems to not make sense, huh? :P I will give an example. There was one member at Serebii who said he read a fanfiction of a Jolteon who is fast when battling, but lazy when not battling. XD

Yes, a few of my pokemon do. I won't name names, but off field one pokemon will be a nurturing big brothery type but on the field he turns into a bloodthirsty fighter.

 

[Astinus]

You people! Stop posting while I'm in work! D=

Hey, Bay! That Jolteon belongs to the fic written by the one who mentioned it. I am an avid reader of that fic. :p

But as for your question, I think that my main character's starter Pokemon is like that. Outside of battle, he's a worried little coward. In battle he's fearless, but only because he was told that he had to be brave in battle because it was his duty as a Pokemon.

ACC, I dun know why everyone is afraid of the "evil" names. Yes, they might bring up bad connotations with some readers, but imagine the fun you could have with a character named Lucifer! He could hand out balloons and cookies! (And now I just realized that I spelled "cookies" wrong at work. Oh well.)

FireTrainer92, just post here and ask for reviews or PM a few people. Careful With That Axe, Pichu might be willing to give you a review, and I know that your fic is on my list of ones to look over. But school is starting soon for the both of us, so you'll just have to be patient a bit.

 

[Scarlet Weather]

Actually, there's some measure of uncertainty as to whether Lucifer (which literally means 'light bearer') does apply to Satan. (Its mention in the Bible is at a completely random place in one of the books of the major prophets, and it could possibly be referring to a king or a ruler of some sort). Just thought I'd point that out.

I have a roleplaying character named Achan, so I guess that's a start for breaking the trend. (For those of you who don't know, Achan is famous for stealing treasure that was an offering to the Lord, thereby removing the Lord's favor from Israel just before a crucial battle. They lost, and the next day they drew lots to see who was the culprit. Achan lost, so he and his family all got killed. Yep, that's exactly the kind of name you expect someone to give their kid. XD)

Firetrainer92, you're the one with the Pokemon Ranger fic, correct? Yah, I've been meaning to review it myself. I'll see what I can do later today, when I'm not busy trying to milk as much as possibly out of these last few days before I return to school.

 

[Incinermyn]

Don't know if this is really the place for sharing ideas for fanfics (if not sorry for making a post in the wrong place), but I've kind of got two ideas, one for a short story and another for a short novel, I could use some kind of opinion on. Here they are.

Biohazard (A Mystery Dungeon short novel)
Ten years after the meteor almost destroyed the world of Pokemon, Alakazam, Charizard, and Tyranitar (same ones from the MD games) are out exploring the ruins of a human civilization that had been abandoned 500 years ago. Their trek brings them to an abandoned biology lab, where they encounter a parasitic monster that tries to drain Charizard's body fluids. Fending it off, they are then attacked by an second beast and that is that last they're heard of.

Their disappearance causes an uproar in Pokemon Square several days later. Numerous rescue teams have been called in from all over the area, one of which is a new team led by a mysterious Buizel (really a human) whose suffering from amnesia and another famous team that's slowly taking the place of Alakazam's.

At first, Buizel's team is denied the mission, but when the other team goes missing, his team quickly takes it over. However, going to the ruins brings back horrible memories of events leading to a plague that eliminated the entire population of the old city.

Too make matter's worse, discovering the parasite and the second monster capable of causing horrible infections that caused the disappearance of the last two teams makes him question if he was the one that created them and caused the plague that destroyed the city eons before. Also, battling the two may also cause the second to unleash its horrible power upon the world of Pokemon.


Week 23 (A short story)
Zack couldn't have been more spoiled. The son of a CEO and top Pokemon Coordinator, he was rich, got everything he wanted, and had no reason to do anything but sit around working on his laptop all day.

Upset with his lazy attitude, his parents sent him to live on a farm with his Uncle Barney for the next week. Unbeknownst to Zack, though, he wouldn't just be stuck doing farm chores all week; Barney would have him become a junior trainer at the Pokemon gym he ran.

Given a seemingly sickly Pokemon called Oposease (clearly a fakemon of mine), Zack slowly began to befriend the creature. However, doing so would cause it to evolve into something that most people hated. Will he look past the horrible popular opinion of the creature, or make it suffer from loneliness?

 

[Grovyle42(Griff8416)]

Wait, we're allowed to ask for reviews here? If thats the case, Could a few people review my fanfic? I want to have at least one comment before posting the next chapter


I like the idea of "Biohazard" It has potential to be good. But if its done scrappily then it could be poor, so make sure to take time to write it. Your short story idea is also good. Personally I like longer stories as opposed to short ones, though.

 

[Bay]

"Biohazard" sounds like a really good idea. You should totally do that one! Like Griff said though, take your time. Also, this has potential for character development. Would like to see how you will write the Buizel's reaction towards this situation of his.

Week 23 sounds like a good story too. Hm, wonder what kind of Pokemon Oposease is. XD

Well, good luck!

 

[Incinermyn]

You like my ideas? Awesome! Personally I like shorter fics mainly because they're a little easier to write and don't have to be really as in-depth in some areas like longer ones do. But still, there some things that just can't be avoided. Of course, I'm gonna take my time with them.

 

[Enperuto]

Ideas are trivial. Writing quality is what matters. Thus, if you want them to really work out, it'd be better to write something simpler and work on the quality of the writing. Of course plot still has substance, but ideas are useless without writing quality. Also, of course, ideas are as common as the fish in the sea.

But you're ideas do sound intriguing... which is generally what draws a reader first to the whole thing of opening up the thread. Then the quality must do its job.

 

[Incinermyn]

^My overall writing quality shouldn't be too bad, considering how I normally do take the time to read over most things I write to make sure there aren't a lot of significant spelling/grammar errors. Also, I normally try to make sure there's a smooth flow so it's not like one thing's happening in one paragraph and then there's a jump to a completely unrelated thing in the next.

But, you still raise a good point... People can come up with ideas for fanfics left and right, but these mean nothing unless one's writing quality is good.

 

[Gummy]

Hey, I was wondering if anyone could leave a comment in my new fic. I really hate it when you get views but no comments >.<. And I don't wanna post new chapie til I'm sure someone's actually reading.

 

[Astinus]

Glajummy, I'm going to review your fic. It's just that my free time for reviewing as disappeared because school started. So I'm drowning in college work. >.< But I'll get there in the next couple of days, since it's a long weekend from school, and I have an extra day off.

And yes, I always say that no matter how good the idea, your writing quality can either kill it or allow it to thrive.

 

[Gummy]

Okay, thanks Hanako. School's starting up soon for me and I wanted to get a few updates in before it consumes my time.

 

[Grovyle42(Griff8416)]

I'll try to review it too. I'm kind of lacking in time lately so I'll get one in at somepoint.

 

[FireTrainer92]

Pokemon Renegade ranger ch3 is up. If you want to review go ahead. Oh and if someone could make me a banner that would be very much appricated

 

[Grovyle42(Griff8416)]

As of now, this is a possibilty in my mind.

In my fic, after the 2nd or 4th or 6th gym (I haven't decided which, yet) I'm rewriting everything up until a said point (After 8 badges are obtained). I'm doing this, not only because I find that the chapters in between those points are rather sloppy compaired to the rest, since I was in a rush and a new writer while writing them, but also because I no longer want to go down the road of obtaining all 8 badges. It's going to be a tough job. Are there any tips to go about a rewrite like this? ( I will remember continuity)

 

[Gummy]

If you plan on drifting from the Pokemon Master road, I advise it done early and steadily in the story (Like around the 4th badge, when the main character is pretty much an average skilled trainer). In my fic, from the Prologue I adress that the story is much deeper than the simple chilche. This way, the readers aren't expecting my fic to end with my main becoming the new champion without some major conflict take place.

So yeah, what I'm trying to say is don't have your character collect 6 badges, then just go off to defeat Team Rocket when he's so close to qualifying for the Pokemon League.

 

[Grovyle42(Griff8416)]

Ok, its going to be tough to do, since an evolution takes place around that time. I'll have to think of another way for ___ to evolve.

 

[Yamato-san]

all your talk about getting rid of the league quest reminds me a lot of the background behind my own story (spoiler tagged 'cause it's a long read. You may find worthwhile if you were a fan of my previous work, and I'll even be hinting at a few things concerning the plans for my doujinshi revision. Otherwise, you can just skip ahead and see the less in-depth summing up of it all).

Spoiler:

As I've mentioned several times in the past, my brother originally came up with the concept, and looking back, he's made so many mistakes that I'm glad to have more or less completely eliminated them by this point in time. His main idea was pretty simple, really: make a story that's kinda like the anime, except darker and with a more complex plot. In the end, what he really had was the main character competing in the Jouto league, then travelling to Kantou, Houen, and the Orange Islands just for the hell of it. He tried to redeem this by saying that the league thing is just a side-quest, and it would mainly focus on the darker plot with the Rocket Gang (thing is, he actually thought he was being original with this... apparently, neither of us ventured much into the realm of fanfiction :P). What's sad is that I actually decided to go along with this as I was writing the first version of the fic.

Over time, I decided that having the main character go through the other regional leagues past Jouto was kinda pointless, especially as my brother didn't originally have much planned to take place in them (and it likely would've done nothing except make the story drag out too much), so at some point, I decided to scrap them (though, I might still use some of the other continents in the story for completely different reasons). I must've made that decision sometime while I was in the middle of writing that first revision, actually, so by the time I wrote the script, I'd already decided he'd travel through Jouto and nothing more.

However, some implications arose as I was writing the script: I found myself still changing my mind as I wrote it out. At first, I just wanted to convert the old narrative into a different format, but as I looked through the narrative again, I saw many things I thought could need changing; for instance, my brother used a cameo, Kenta from the Crystal special, as Hiro's travelling companion, but he ended up being damned pointless to the overall plot. There was also a scene where Hiro and his friend, Chris (another character I'm going to scrap, since he was just based off my brother's friend in real life and he never did much for the plot either), went into the Burned Tower, decide to clean graffiti off the statues of the legendary beasts, and they came to life and ran off. Really, my brother had plans for a lot of game events to take place... obviously, I decided I didn't want to go for a clone of the games with a darker plot involved, especially seeing as the game protagonists are kinda big Deus Ex Machinas (though with the games, I guess it's excusable since the programmers had to make things convenient for the player. I mean, how are you supposed to collect all the Pokemon if legendaries are untouchable? Not to mention always just happening to be at the right place and time for a scenario to take place for you to witness, with no real explanation other than chance).

[cough] But I digress. For the first couple of chapters, I tried to keep these changes from the first writing rather minor, but then by chapter three (very end of chapter 2, actually), the rewriting got a bit more extreme. I finally decided that I should do away with the whole badge quest altogether, as it really had no connection with the overall plot in the first place (and it's not as if Hiro seems like the type of character who'd wanna participate in a competition). However, since the foreshadowing of the badge quest still lingered from the first couple chapters, I had to think of ways to improvise (if you'll notice, this is actually apparent at the end of chapter 2. I finally decided this immediately as I was finishing the chapter. In the narrative, Hiro got pissed off at the teacher and, despite not being interested in Pokemon before, suddenly decides to leave on a journey since nobody believes he's related to the Eievui sisters and he happened to find an Eievui of his own... which in itself sounds like pretty corny writing, if you ask me. At the end, I had Hiro look at the Pokemon Center, just about ready to write it to make him decide to leave on the journey, when suddenly I started typing differently and made Hiro change his mind just as I did).

To continue on with this while using a somewhat logical excuse (and I guess I can use spoilers now, seeing as I'll be dropping most of this in the next, and hopefully final, version), I was going to have Professor Utsugi's assistant (the fisher lady) shadow Hiro while trying to persuade him to actively participate in a badge quest in order to keep him moving and hopefully avoid the Rocket Gang (Utsugi feared the possibility of him being tracked down if he stayed in one place, but didn't want to outright tell Hiro about the situation), and thus avoid their capture of Hiro's seemingly special Eievui (in actuality, Kiryuu didn't say a thing and the rest of Rocket Dan was none the wiser). The plan would go up in smoke, however, when Hiro, upon being persuaded to participate in the first gym, immediately loses interest and just tries going back to Enju City (he'd also eventually come to the conclusion that the road blocks were intentionally set against him, causing him to plow past them and continue on his way... that, and he'd have another run-in with the Rocket Gang, one which would garner attention from the entire organization). By the time he returned to Enju, I was really hoping to have the story get on track and leave the gym quest behind for good, but unfortunately, I quit writing the script before I got that far.

Now with what I have planned for the manga, I hope to never even use a badge quest in the first place and focus purely on the main plot and characterization. However, some things are going to remain: the renamed main character will travel to a few places in the old version (except it's not exactly journeying; he'll have means of getting there more instantaneously rather than spending time on foot, and he'll be in such places for entirely different reasons and so that certain events I wanted to keep can still take place), but for a good portion of the storyline, he'll remain in Enju City (and I'll probably stick with his disinterest to become a Trainer, probably not even have him catch anything besides his Eievui). When I really think about it, the main character's relationship with the five sisters probably could've been omitted as well (I think my brother only did that because the connection with Eievui, and he was giving an Eievui to the main character in the first place because his favorite Pokemon is one of its evolutions), but I decided against it because I've rather grown to like them, as well as the personalities, unique from any other aspect of the franchise depicting them, which I've given to them over time. However, I don't want them to rot as useless, pointless characters neither, so I've slowly came up with ways that they could play more active roles in the plot (really, I was trying to do this with the script fic as well, but I couldn't think of too much at the time).

Speaking of trying to tie characters I like into the plot... in spite of the lack of traveling involved, I'm definitely gonna work the fisher woman into the revision (I actually had it planned in the script version that she'd be playing major roles later on), and I also enjoyed the chapter with Michie (the last script chapter that I wrote), so I'll figure out some way to work both her and the one-sided romance into the manga. There was also a comic relief/ecchi character that I, by chance, came up with on the spot as I was writing the last two chapters of the narrative version before I called it quits (I'll be surprised if anyone here happens to know her, seeing as I only posted the narrative on SPPF and fanfiction.net, with the narrative being pruned from the former and the later chapters not even being posted on the latter... I also posted the narrative here for those interested in seeing how much I changed things, but I gave that up after the first four chapters. If you do happen to be familiar with the last parts of the narrative, please PM me and don't spoil anything here). Not only did I intend to retain her in future revisions (it's a shame I couldn't get around to debuting her in the scripted revision -_-), but as I came up with her scenarios, I grew to like her so much that I've now got plans to have her participate as a major character later on, rather than being restricted to a comic relief role. Also from the late chapters of the narrative was a one-shot drunkard from Rocket Gang who was seeking a promotion... though he was absent in the script version (and I wasn't planning on using him at the time, neither), I'm now gonna go back and turn him into a bit of a recurring character (with a couple important roles as well). In the manga, you can expect to see him appear rather early on (even before Kiryuu first appears).

So, I guess what I'm saying is that if you want to drop the badge quest completely, maybe you'd be better off revising it completely. If some things came up from the quest idea that you really liked, you could still manage to work them in there if you're creative enough. However, if you're really not in the mood to revise, it's still possible for you to improvise, come up with a solution to deviate from the badges and have the characters stay focused on a bigger issue at hand (it worked in the Special manga, after all).