Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted

[Kishijoten]

Granted. But now you'll never feel the heat ever again, even if you want to.

I wish, I was a ninja.

 

[jigglyppuff8]

Granted. As a newbie ninja, you are immediately annihilated by the superior pirates.

I wish for The Dreamland.

 

[Team_SJK]

Granted, but it's full of nightmares.

I wish I were a character on the Final Fantasy series.

 

[♣Gawain♣]

Granted, but eventually you'll be deleted because of a virus.

I wish for some cookie.

 

[Elite Overlord LeSabre™]

Granted. After eating the cookie, FBI and ATF raid your house.

I wish I wasn't being indicted on wire fraud charges.

 

[Charizard632]

Granted. Your house suddenly catches on fire, and you evacuate quickly.

I wish I had a blendtec blender.

 

[Comrade Nikita Ivanova]

Granted, however your hand gets stuck in it, and you can't sell that tomato and hand puree to pay for the doctor bills.

I wish for an 8 inch floppy disk.

 

[TheAppleFreak]

Granted, but it won't fit in her your disk drive.
Sexual pun intended.

I wish for cake that is not a lie.

 

[Charizard632]

Granted. This color is now red. This color is now blue. This color is now white.

I wish I can read, speak, and understand Japanese fluently.

 

[dieter57]

granted but you loose the ability to move your mouth, open your eyes, and go deaf.

i wish i had a mac book.

 

[ubernuke]

Granted, but it came shipped in a filled aquarium.

I wish I was an NBA player.

 

[Buddy14]

Granted, but everyone will hate you, and you get injured on the first game so you cant play. HAHAHAHAHAHA
I wish for a wish that can't be corrupted

 

[Eos Aduro]

You get a thousand more wishes! The wishes aren't corrupt, but you become so power-obsessed YOU'RE the corrupt one!!

I wish for a flying motorcycle made of candy and dreams!!

 

[Comrade Nikita Ivanova]

Granted, but you'll never be able to join a biker gang because it's just too girly.

I wish the present was totally retro.

 

[Team_SJK]

Granted. Everything from 1971 comes back and replaces all of our existing technology.

I wish Xenogears was re-released for Nintendo Wii.

 

[Comrade Nikita Ivanova]

(That wouldn't be a bad thing, in my opinion. XD)

Granted, but while playing it you let go of the Wii remote and break the television.

I wish for a station wagon.

 

[ReyRey-Pyon]

granted. but its a toy

I wish i had a Platypus <u<

 

[Team_SJK]

granted. but its a toy

I wish i had a Platypus <u<

Granted, but it mortally injures you when you try to teach it a cool trick.

I wish I could eat as much rocky road ice cream as I want without getting sick, fat, or full.

 

[Comrade Nikita Ivanova]

Granted, but it's literally made of rocky road, now with 40% more rocks and gravel!

I wish the world had 8-bit graphics.

 

[donavannj]

Granted, but you can no longer feed yourself, and the world crashes while being converted from 3 dimensions to 2 dimensions. The world is no more.

I wish for 8-bit graphics in a 3D environment.