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Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted

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Granted, but the star automatically dissapears from existence

I wish I could make popcorn with the snap of a finger.
 
Granted, but the popcorn's stale.

I wish Luis Fonsi would have a concert in Detroit. (Look him up if you don't know him)
 
Granted, but you lose your dignity in the process.

I wish I HAD dignity
 
Granted, but you lost it playing children's card games.

I wish my stomach always had a satisfactory amount of edible, healthy, and tasty food that would not make me sick inside of it.
 
Granted but it's so annoying that it injures your brain every time you hear it.
I wish that someone would reverse the letters of this made-up word in the post below:
fhiosiewofejrowdswqslsqkowihjcbncbshskwoeorujcnsmsbwheigcjmdjdjddjtkgofsosdi
 
Granted, but there's nothing needed to be done.

I wish Pokemon and The Hunger Games had a crossover book/movie.
 
Granted but you only get smarter by learning that there is no such thing as being smart

The deathly delicious irony in that.

I wish my bed was a cage bed like Stocking's bed (From PSG)
 
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