So a Castform walks into a bar...

[PageEmp]

And feels sad because he can't exactly walk as he has no legs.

A Bisharp walks into the bar...

 

[Adam Levine]

...and looks for some legendary Pokémon to kidnap.

So a Ferrothorn walks into a bar...

 

[Sirfetch’d]

...and sets up spikes at the entrance!

So then a Mandibuzz flies into a bar...

 

[FireSnow]

...and pecks at the passed out patrons.

So a Magnezone hovers into the bar...

 

[PageEmp]

And the spikes at the entrance get attached to him.

A Bergmite enters the bar...

 

[Hyzenthlay]

...And is used as extra ice!

Then an Aromatisse strides into the bar...

 

[Adam Levine]

...and makes everyone high.

So an Aggron walks slowly but noisily into a bar...

 

[illumine]

...and is confronted by Count Dracula on Rapidash, making it pass out from shock. Count Dracula uses a Thunder Stone to evolve one Rapidash into a Raichu, because he is evil.

So a Pidgey cautiously takes a Japanese Popemobile into a bar...

 

[PageEmp]

And bumps into the aforementioned Aggron, who gets angry from the bump from the bird so he uses a nasty metal sound on him, causing him to explode. RIP Pidgey, 2016-2016.

Mew sees Pidgey's soul and so flies into the bar...

 

[illumine]

...and cries, like a lot. But then someone makes Fake Tears a TM, so then it does that, and is happy about the Pidgey dying due to the sound of Metal.

So a Hypno walks suspiciously into a bar...

 

[Sun]

...it is arrested because it looks hella nasty!
So then a Lopunny hops into a bar...

 

[illumine]

...and uses Focus Energy. As a result, the bar turns out to be an actual metal bar, making its collision super-effective and a critical hit. It feels accomplished for knocking out the pun bar.

So an Ekans slithers into a bar...

 

[Sirfetch’d]

....and sheds it's skin which is later turned into a wallet containing money that buys a drink from the same bar!

So then a Pancham walks into a bar...

 

[PageEmp]

And chops BadSheep.

BadSheep walks out of the bar in annoyance, turns into a Psyduck, and walks into the bar...

 

[FireSnow]

...and gets an even worse headache from drinking too much! Poor decisions Psyduck...

So Psyduck's older brother, Golduck, walks into the bar...

 

[illumine]

...carrying a copy of 'The Wallet of Kai Lung.' It is unsure about whether it is an actual wallet, or a book. It asks an Umbreon, that uses Bite on it.

So then a Psyduck walks nonchalantly into a bar, again...

 

[PageEmp]

...gets a really bad headache, and so he vommits onto the bar floor, causing the aforementioned Umbreon to slip and hit his head, and everyone starts running out of the bar. The aforementioned Golduc gives him an award for what happened just now.

Umbreon gets angry, de-evolves himself, and uses a Fire stone on himself, and so becomes a Flareon who stomps into the bar...

 

[Adam Levine]

...and becomes the Pokémon ISIS. She forces everyone to worship the Dome and get rid of the Helix once and for all.

Hearing this, a Pidgeot enters the bar...

 

[PageEmp]

And gets a podium and explains that TPP is just a silly normal thing that people are into, and as a result all the mons should worship neither.

Suddenly, an Omanyte hears this and crashes into the bar...

 

[illumine]

...and explains that people should convert to the old religions, in a deadpan voice. They all listen to the Omanyte as he explains how liking XY104 leads them to damnation, and they should rather cut their arms off than do that.

So then a not that belated Ditto arrives in a bar...