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Teaching a monkey how to do things right on a computer

Mitchman

Banned
  • 7,485
    Posts
    16
    Years
    I know stupid title but yeah its a bit relative.(stupid monkey=tecnology retarded family)
    So yeah do you guys have family members who piss you the hell off cause it takes 30 minutes to explain why the song wont play cause its a virus or maybe those of your family who say no dont give me firefox its too confusing when you clearly explained the hole in IE and why its better? I do. Every single person actually. If i dont have my uncle who tells me he knows everything and almost blowed his pc up after supposedly building his computer i have my cousins who cant even drag and drop in windows.
     
  • 1,024
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    16
    Years
    Well if one has there own good computer then they shouldn't have these problems, however unfortunately for me we share one home computer and I have family uneducated and therefore very ignorant, I take control of my computer.
    No one touches my baby when I am not around, but then because of that I get into a lot of arguments and fights with them.
    Hopefully in the future I will take this machine as my own!
     
  • 1,608
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    19
    Years
    My mother and stepfather are both IT professionals, so I guess I don't have the same problems as you do. ^_^;
     

    Mitchman

    Banned
  • 7,485
    Posts
    16
    Years
    Ajh yeah i dont have problem with both parents just my mom. My dad has been in the computer business for 23 years and my mom 13. Once my dad stopped that business and went to another profession my mom forgot everything. Otherwise outside the household family orientated im surronded by idiots.
     
  • 4
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    15
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    • Seen Jan 3, 2009
    Well, Final Fantasy is a bit of a computer nerd and so is his mum so we call on them when we have computer troubles. My mum sucks at computers. xP
     

    Full Metal

    C(++) Developer.
  • 810
    Posts
    16
    Years
    My parents are absolute MORONS when it comes to computers. Evidently a webpage is programming that could make a virus. I made it in FRONTPAGE for crying outloud! Firefox gets around non-existent firewalls and is a virus because of it. Scripting a gba game is a virus. if it's not like their computer, guess what...
    IT's a stinking virus. Your computer (with 256 mb ram (as far as i know the lowest amount there is) is slowed down because you changed the background!
    Oh and the list goes on...
    the sad thing is...
    I dualbooted ubuntu and xp pro
    added all my software (firefox included)
    onto a pentium III computer with 512 mb of ram and it
    still runs faster than my other computer
    they just don't realize it cuz they have atleast 3GB of ram
    they have an amazing processor too
    so they have a nice computer
    me and my sis have two 3 year old computers which run at a decent speed
    and a pentium III runs faster because it has 2x the ram. If that don't slap them in the face and help em figure it out...
    well they're morons for good.
    the funniest thing is they think thatt changing the background can put a virus on youtube! if it don't work it's because i made a virus.
     

    True Reign

      
  • 3,312
    Posts
    15
    Years
    • Seen Jul 31, 2010
    My mom thinks going on my stepdad's computer and clicking on advertisements is funny. She called him and told him that she did it on accident and my stepdad started yelling at her (he's working for twelve hours a day now, and now he has to get even less sleep because he has to check his computer for virus'). Now she can't go on any computer, but the laptop downstairs, lol.
     

    Mitchman

    Banned
  • 7,485
    Posts
    16
    Years
    OH lol you got a nice famliy there. Jee hunny i kinda got a virus through internet explorer and i was hoping you could forgive me. What kinda virus dear? Well we will be broke in about 5 no 4 minutes. BYEBYE! I could actually see that happening to someone. You got to teach yoiur parents the dangers of viruses.
     

    Slowking rides Latios

    Sir Slowking
  • 16
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    16
    Years
    Usually my parents know to leave the computer to me, but when they're forced on it, I'm bombarded with questions on, how do you insert a tick in this box? how do I go to this site? etc.
     

    Franceschi

    a.k.a justin timberlake
  • 2,718
    Posts
    15
    Years
    • Seen Jan 5, 2015
    My mother and stepfather are both IT professionals, so I guess I don't have the same problems as you do. ^_^;
    Lord do I wish I was in the same position as you. :[

    I'm not allowed to put Firefox onto my Auntie's computer because it's too confusing for her. Even though I explained the gigantic hole in IE and showed her that BBC page, she still wouldn't stand for it. Thankfully, my brothers all know about computers so there is some sanity. XD;;
     

    Zet

  • 7,690
    Posts
    16
    Years
    the only person I can relate to about computers is my uncle, while the rest of my family doesn't know what they're doing, so it's annoying at times
     

    Mitchman

    Banned
  • 7,485
    Posts
    16
    Years
    Lord do I wish I was in the same position as you. :[

    I'm not allowed to put Firefox onto my Auntie's computer because it's too confusing for her. Even though I explained the gigantic hole in IE and showed her that BBC page, she still wouldn't stand for it. Thankfully, my brothers all know about computers so there is some sanity. XD;;
    EXACTLY what i did francheschi. i mean how hard is it to understand your files will be stolen and your contact info and such will be retrieved. Some people just dont get things.
     
  • 37,467
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    16
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    • they/them
    • Seen Apr 19, 2024
    My mother and real father are IT professionals, so I'm the one to ask them about anything >.< And my brother. A real computer geek~ So I guess I'm the retarded monkey here?
     

    Camisado

    a therapeutic chain of events
  • 1,032
    Posts
    16
    Years
    I actually work in IT (I'm an apprentice in local government - we support over 3500 PCs and approximately 5 Macs xD). I'm on the Service Desk (helpdesk) at the moment, and the amount of hilarious phonecalls you hear in our office is excellent.
    Kelton: Yes, type it into the address bar... ... It's not working? It says 'did not match any documents'?
    James: ...OH LORD HE'S TYPING IT INTO GOOGLE!
    Then I get people who don't know the difference between "Office", "Word", "Microsoft" and "Windows", who will power their monitor off when you ask them to shut down the computer, and will ring up because their Num Lock key isn't on.

    My mum doesn't understand the concept of the taskbar, or the difference between "back" and "close" in Internet Explorer (she refuses to use Firefox, but more because IE has the word "Internet" in it).

    Additionally she always signs into my dad's user account on the PC when banking, "because we always access it from this account", regardless of the fact that the router holds our external IP and has NAT, so Lloyds isn't going to know if it's from our PC, iMac or my laptop =/
     

    GKS

    Retired Hacker
  • 1,320
    Posts
    16
    Years
    • Seen Dec 23, 2013
    Just my mom, and she actually took a Java Script course. My dad is an experienced programmer, so it doesn't matter.
     

    Cartmic

    Hi there, it's been awhile.
  • 618
    Posts
    20
    Years
    I know stupid title but yeah its a bit relative.(stupid monkey=tecnology retarded family)
    So yeah do you guys have family members who piss you the hell off cause it takes 30 minutes to explain why the song wont play cause its a virus or maybe those of your family who say no dont give me firefox its too confusing when you clearly explained the hole in IE and why its better? I do. Every single person actually. If i dont have my uncle who tells me he knows everything and almost blowed his pc up after supposedly building his computer i have my cousins who cant even drag and drop in windows.

    I don't have that problem, as my family are a Linux house hold, plus I don't live with my parents all year round.

    Yes your great friend Final Fantasy, you are not just posting here to raise your post count because your what we call a Beginner Trainer are you?

    Who cares!, we all might have done it at some point. Also you aren't exactly an older member either are you?
     

    Capt. Couch

    Wake me... When you need me...
  • 331
    Posts
    15
    Years
    Well, I was giving my family IT help at the age of four, so I guess I'm in the same boat as a lot of you. Man, Windows 95 was a pain... Huge memory hog, consistent 3D Driver error messages, and the OS dumping too many error logs, not to mention the incompatibility with so many programs due to its memory usage...

    But I digress.

    My family isn't full of idiots in terms of computers per se, they just forget things. A lot. I can teach them a certain procedure and they'll ask me how to do it when they need to do so at a critical time, especially when I'm not there. You wouldn't believe how hard it is to give somebody IT help over a cell phone considering the circumstances I'm usually under.

    They can figure things out themselves though. They usually forget it after a while however. They (particularly my dad) can also have a real big moment where they think they know what they're talking about with a PC and yet they don't. I contradict them and they scold me for retaliating... For example, my dad's PC is (or was at the time of its standards during manufacture) very efficient, but he asks too much out of it at times, and we lost the overclock settings the last time I changed the CMOS battery on the mobo. Since I didn't remember them and I didn't have a calculation chart with me, I didn't fiddle with it. At times, he'll have multiple programs open (mostly due to the fault of my mom who doesn't know that programs can be set to start on boot-up and run in the background after the install) and he'll say that whatever IE (:P) window we had opened for a certain amount of time (try five minutes) diverted the memory resources and killed it, causing us to wait ten minutes for it to catch up with itself.

    Oh well, good thing I get paid at times for doing even simple things. ;)
     
  • 3,518
    Posts
    19
    Years
    • Age 32
    • Seen Nov 9, 2021
    My Uncle is an Oracle Database Manager for the technology company Hobsons, and he's the family go-to-guy for all technology related stuff.

    I tried desperately to get my mother to use Ubuntu Linux, but she couldn't handle the easiest Linux distro <_<
     
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