The Big Red Button

[Charizard632]

You get raisin cookies filled with Anthrax.

*Pushes that red button next to a laptop*

 

[Hikamaru]

The laptop turns into a robot.

*Pushes the red button for iced tea*

 

[Zayphora]

The robot is actually Marvin, who starts complaining about stuff and refuses to get you any iced tea.

Darn it, you made me want iced tea >.>

Pushes the button on the ceiling.

 

[Hikamaru]

Hikari gets you arrested for stalking.

*Pushes the red button that gives milkshakes*

 

[Arenax Seventhian]

Gets milkshakes, only to find out in to your horror, that the milk used was expired months ago!

*Pushes red button deploying cooked salmon*

 

[Charizard632]

It gives you a cooked salmon, made with a pan that uses Mercury to cook it.

*pushes red button*

 

[TheFattestSnorlax]

You drink milk with the expiration date 6-13-92. That was 20 years ago...

*pushes red button*

 

[Zayphora]

A cow makes you swim in a pool of expired milk. Eww.

Pusheeeees theeeeee button.

 

[Hikamaru]

You have been caught hiding over 1,000 secret documents in your briefcase, marked as "confidential". Hikari is not happy.

*Pushes that red button that destroys the documents*

 

[TheFattestSnorlax]

Wikileaks is now a domain website. Okay!

*pushes red button*

 

[Hikamaru]

WikiLeaks gets taken over by ponies, destroying all the files. It's a win for Hikari.

*Pushes the red button that turns everything into My Little Ponies*

 

[TheFattestSnorlax]

The ponies are now Pokemon. Great!

*pushes red button*

 

[Hikamaru]

Andrew Hussie signs his name on everything that you own after he discovers your newfound love for Homestuck. (Btw he's the creator of Homestuck)

*Pushes the red button which gives me a cookie*

 

[Zayphora]

The cookie is actually a grenade. BOOOM!

Pusheees tee buuuuutoooonn

 

[TheFattestSnorlax]

For killing Hikari10, you will be sentenced to execution!

*pushes nyan cat button*

 

[Hikamaru]

Guess who shows up...

Spoiler:

Hi, I am Derpy Hooves... and I will rule the internet!

*Pushes the red button that causes you to laugh*

 

[TheFattestSnorlax]

All of your ponies now belong to Tyler. Get them away from me.

*pushes button once more*

 

[Hikamaru]

You start loving satirical comedy and realize that Homestuck is AWESOME.

*Pushes the red button that stops WikiLeaks trolls*

 

[Zayphora]

A troll(like, an actual Norwegian ugly thing) shows up.

Pushes the red button that smells like cat

 

[Hikamaru]

The cat gets shot at.

*Pushes that red button that calls the Homestuck trolls*