Dear Anonymous,
"I want to scream and shout, and let it all out."
-- will.i.am
There is not a single thing in this world I could ever say to describe how you've made me feel, Anon. I spent so much time and effort on you, one single being who was afraid of love and being with someone due to past relationships. I was scared too, just so you know. But I went through a lot to help you feel more comfortable, even in general with other people. I loved you and held you dear, regardless of if you would ever be with me or not. I knew you felt the same for me, and I held onto that you know.
Before I knew it, our friendship became something of dreams. We were head over heels for each other. There wasn't a single thing I could find about you that I didn't like, including your flaws. You were the perfect being to me. The vision of love in the single body of a being to me. I treasured you so much, and loved you so deeply. I gave you everything I possibly could to make you happy, just to see you smile.
And eventually after a long period of time... you told me you loved me and that you wanted to be with me. The day that I never believed would come. You told me that you didn't want to let go of me no matter what, and that I was the apple of your eye. I felt the same about you, and I wanted to be with you for better or for worse. So thus, we ended up together, and everything seemed so perfect and right with the world. That was probably the epitome of happiness in my life thus far.
Now tell me, Anon. As sweet as that story sounds and 'happy-ever-after' it seems or
whatever,
how could you go back on every single thing you ever told me? I don't know if you realize, but when you tell someone you love them, you imply that you love their flaws too. It's not love without that key piece. When you make the decision to ask someone to be in a
relationship with you ( not dating ), you're committed to finding a way to make it work.
You gave up on me so quickly all of a sudden, just because of a misstep I made. Haven't you ever heard the phrase, "mistakes happen, we're only human"? You said that even though we were friends now, nothing would change. You treated me just like you did when we were together, and flirted a lot with me. Complementing me the same way you used to after everything settled. I truly felt like you still loved me... that maybe you just wanted to work out your own issues first before we could be together again. I held onto that for a bit.
Then soon you found one of my flaws and decided to make a break for it.
How bloody dare you. After all that trust and investment I gave to you, you dare to take your word of love back just like that. You threw me out like yesterday's trash because you realized you can't be truthful about your feelings? You toyed with my emotions and my heart, Anon. If you weren't ready to commit yourself, why didn't you at least do me that honor? I
believed in you. I
trusted your word.
You acted completely selfish, and just because I called you out on it among a couple other truths I dealt you, you haven't spoken to me in well over a month. The saddest part of this whole stupid thing, is while you're off ignoring my existence for reasons I still don't grasp, I'm still sitting here waiting for you. I'm still aching, still hurting, still
crying.
Still loving you, still wanting you back in my life... Pathetic, huh? As much as I wish I could hate you for this stupid crap you pulled on me, I can't. I guess it's because I'm actually true to my word of love, and when I say it I mean it.
What a freakin' concept.
"
One of the worst things you can do to a human being, is pretend you care about them more than you really do."
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Dear Anonymous,
Wow. Thanks for the confidence boost. :< After all this time, I thought I actually sort of made a mark on you guys. I thought that I actually had, get this, a bit of a legacy in that community. I was a character among us for an entire year, and I was told over and over again how great of a job I did. How easily replaced I was by some new person who plays the same character. How dare you guys over-complement them too in a way that implies they are already better than I was. I realize that you and I don't get along that well because I disagree with the way you do things, but this, ha. Wow, this is an all-time low.
T-That's awful rude of you, Anon. I don't do those things to you, so why you gotta do it to me? No bueno. Then you go and tell my friend you didn't
intend to aim any harm my way with those exaggerated complements of yours. Yeah,
right. I wasn't born yesterday. Stop trying to play so innocent already... :|
Oh well, at least I don't have to deal with it anymore. You can have your new person as far as I'm concerned.
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Dear Anonymous,
After part of the aforementioned actions, it's sad how I still do really miss you. Even though you can be really jerkish behind my back. You think I didn't hear about that one huh? Thanks for that, by the way. I didn't even
do anything to you. We had our problems and stuff, but jeez, it wasn't even cause of personal conflict between us. I'd really like to work through them and figure out what's up. I miss having my late night buddy. Feels like you hate me though... I'm really not even sure why. I wonder what's going through your head. Why don't you talk to me about it? I'm sure it's something we can talk through...
... Or do you just not miss me as much as I miss you...? That's okay too, I guess... It's not like I'm unused to this kind of treatment by now. XD
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Dear Anonymous,
Oh so now you come back...? What the flying Tepig. Make up your mind please, it's killing me. Do you want to talk or not...? I just don't have the patience anymore.. I'm sorry... guess it's pretty obvious why though. -Pokes the previous posts- v~v;
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Dear Anonymouses,
You're horrible people.