FireRed hack: Pokemon Chronicles :D

The screens could be fixed. Why is Dialga floating on water? And the 5th pic is just like in Viridian City. And the maps are so empty. Try adding more, like trees, flowers, a path, ect.

nice hack!
i like the tiles,
is there a rom base with those?
if there s can you pleas pm me

warning: tl;dr but its a good review and i spent time on it so read it anyway! >:o

Okay. Let's start this off with a compliment. The two banners you have aren't terrible, and your CSS seems effective enough though I wouldn't really try to match neon green as a border color with sky blue and black. "Information" only has two Ns in it, by the way. ;)

aaand then the thread goes a little downhill from there. First off, I have no idea what you're attempting to do with your story. Okay, Red came back to Kanto after he won things. And then what...? I mean, what's in your story that makes me want to go and play your hack? "Other people will help him"? Yeah that doesn't sound like fun to me. It's not like you can't do something with Red returning to Kanto (although that sounds like a poor excuse to not have to map much more), but you could do something more than what you have now. I mean I can envision an epic hack with him returning but something devastating happened to the land where everything changed and nothing is the way he remembers it. You could do so much more by thinking a little out of the box, and that's what I think you need to do for your story. I really struggle to see how that's going to attract anyone. :(

The features don't really interest me either. "New events 1%"... this actually sounds more like some progress thing you got going on. And I have no idea what any of these things are. "Proffesor Elm"? Yeah that's a person. If it's an event, say it's an event. But none of these things are really "features" in the sense of the word I am thinking of. (Oh, except "alot of missions" but yeah)

Okay cool sprites for characters but your descriptions are kind of random, I guess. "he doesn't know that red is back, he helps him to beat the team rocket from madness"? That doesn't make logical sense. If you cleaned that up a bit it would be better. :3

I think my biggest pet peeve in the first few screens is the fact that you used almost entirely one grass tile to map the whole map. There are four in FireRed, if you didn't know. Please mix them up a bit. Also Typing While Capitalizing Every Word In A Sentence Not Only Looks Terrible, It Is Incorrect. Please don't do that. I mean, I don't even read posts written like that any more. :/

UGH YOUR MAPS ARE ALMOST THE SAME AS THE ORIGINALS... at least as far as I can see from the screens. Yes, I realize this is kind of like a remake of Kanto on FireRed (which doesn't make too much sense imo but whatevs), but seriously, you can do more than insert a few tiles and throw them onto a map. I mean, even the same events are there. :|

Your title screen looks pretty. :3

Err, I'm making the assumption, but why is there a trainer in the first town? I realize I've been trained to think that there's only trainers in routes but in the first town? Really? That's just something I wouldn't want to do. What if they accidentally battle him without getting their 'mons? :(

That Dialga scene looks almost exactly the same as the Lapras one in FR/LG with a Dialga sprite over the Lapras one. Please change it up a bit. It's just too much recognizability (which is apparently not a word whoo!) and familiarity with the FR/LG games that deters me from liking that scene. However the last few screens look okay, minus the poor grammar on the girl scene. that's probably one of the things that hurts hacks the most, in my opinion; run everything through a spellcheck at least before you compile your scripts!

I'm really not interested in watching the videos right now but I could probably do that later.

Anyway, overall, I think if you cleaned up a few things and created a more solid story, this could be a fairly decent hack. If it stays at the stage it's at right now though, I don't see it going anywhere.

Replys

Vrai said:

warning: tl;dr but its a good review and i spent time on it so read it anyway! >:o

Okay. Let's start this off with a compliment. The two banners you have aren't terrible, and your CSS seems effective enough though I wouldn't really try to match neon green as a border color with sky blue and black. "Information" only has two Ns in it, by the way. ;)

aaand then the thread goes a little downhill from there. First off, I have no idea what you're attempting to do with your story. Okay, Red came back to Kanto after he won things. And then what...? I mean, what's in your story that makes me want to go and play your hack? "Other people will help him"? Yeah that doesn't sound like fun to me. It's not like you can't do something with Red returning to Kanto (although that sounds like a poor excuse to not have to map much more), but you could do something more than what you have now. I mean I can envision an epic hack with him returning but something devastating happened to the land where everything changed and nothing is the way he remembers it. You could do so much more by thinking a little out of the box, and that's what I think you need to do for your story. I really struggle to see how that's going to attract anyone. :(

The features don't really interest me either. "New events 1%"... this actually sounds more like some progress thing you got going on. And I have no idea what any of these things are. "Proffesor Elm"? Yeah that's a person. If it's an event, say it's an event. But none of these things are really "features" in the sense of the word I am thinking of. (Oh, except "alot of missions" but yeah)

Okay cool sprites for characters but your descriptions are kind of random, I guess. "Gold the 6th Pokedex owner comes to kanto to complete his national pokedex but he doesnt only see the kanto but also other region pokemon, on his journey he sees the dirty Team Rocket! "? That doesn't make logical sense. If you cleaned that up a bit it would be better. :3

I think my biggest pet peeve in the first few screens is the fact that you used almost entirely one grass tile to map the whole map. There are four in FireRed, if you didn't know. Please mix them up a bit. Also Typing While Capitalizing Every Word In A Sentence Not Only Looks Terrible, It Is Incorrect. Please don't do that. I mean, I don't even read posts written like that any more. :/

UGH YOUR MAPS ARE ALMOST THE SAME AS THE ORIGINALS... at least as far as I can see from the screens. Yes, I realize this is kind of like a remake of Kanto on FireRed (which doesn't make too much sense imo but whatevs), but seriously, you can do more than insert a few tiles and throw them onto a map. I mean, even the same events are there. :|

Your title screen looks pretty. :3

Err, I'm making the assumption, but why is there a trainer in the first town? I realize I've been trained to think that there's only trainers in routes but in the first town? Really? That's just something I wouldn't want to do. What if they accidentally battle him without getting their 'mons? :(

That Dialga scene looks almost exactly the same as the Lapras one in FR/LG with a Dialga sprite over the Lapras one. Please change it up a bit. It's just too much recognizability (which is apparently not a word whoo!) and familiarity with the FR/LG games that deters me from liking that scene. However the last few screens look okay, minus the poor grammar on the girl scene. that's probably one of the things that hurts hacks the most, in my opinion; run everything through a spellcheck at least before you compile your scripts!

I'm really not interested in watching the videos right now but I could probably do that later.

Anyway, overall, I think if you cleaned up a few things and created a more solid story, this could be a fairly decent hack. If it stays at the stage it's at right now though, I don't see it going anywhere.

Click to expand...

i dont understand what you mean about the features & progress well every hack at starting have less progress, and the player gets his/her pokemon at the starting (in his house when he tires to get out his/her mother stops him/her and gives him his pokemon) its impossible to go out without the pokemon in this game so you can battle him with your pokemons no Fail and the Girl is a team rocket member who try's to act like a little girl and she always mess with him in the end you finally battle her and she
Looses! you dont need to rate a hack if you raet the progress!
and you dont care about the CSS!

DigitalDetection said:

nice hack!
i like the tiles,
is there a rom base with those?
if there s can you pleas pm me

Click to expand...

thx i will give you my hack rom after beta/alpha. (i dint used any rom base)

Destiny Demon said:

The screens could be fixed. Why is Dialga floating on water? And the 5th pic is just like in Viridian City. And the maps are so empty. Try adding more, like trees, flowers, a path, ect.

Click to expand...

well dialga is flying i still need to add animations so it should look like its flying
btw i have an update with new tiles :D :

how is it? i am gonna change the windows of the house!

New tiles look cool=) Great update

mustafa505 said:

i dont understand what you mean about the features & progress well every hack at starting have less progress, and the player gets his/her pokemon at the starting (in his house when he tires to get out his/her mother stops him/her and gives him his pokemon) its impossible to go out without the pokemon in this game so you can battle him with your pokemons no Fail and the Girl is a team rocket member who try's to act like a little girl and she always mess with him in the end you finally battle her and she
Looses! you dont need to rate a hack if you raet the progress!
and you dont care about the CSS!

Click to expand...

I doubt he was connecting to the progress you've made thus far and nor was he rating your progress. He was commenting on your features. And I'm guessing the '1%' is the amount of progress you've done in implementing that particular feature.
Well, some people do care about the CSS.
Anyways, it's looking good. Good luck on it.

mustafa505 said:

i dont understand what you mean about the features & progress well every hack at starting have less progress, and the player gets his/her pokemon at the starting (in his house when he tires to get out his/her mother stops him/her and gives him his pokemon) its impossible to go out without the pokemon in this game so you can battle him with your pokemons no Fail and the Girl is a team rocket member who try's to act like a little girl and she always mess with him in the end you finally battle her and she
Looses! you dont need to rate a hack if you raet the progress!
and you dont care about the CSS!

Click to expand...

No, I wasn't rating the way you put the progress, I think I just said something about how features =/= progress or something like that. At least, that's what I intended. And okay, I understand that as far as receiving their pokemon in the house, although I still don't think there should be a trainer there. ^_^

...and then I have no idea what you said after that so I shall conclude my post here.

Crimson Stardust said:

heylo,just want to say this before starting,Vrai was just putting his opinions on your hack here,you can decide to follow them or not and try to put your sentence carefully to tell him that what he thought is not correct is actually how you plan it want to be.
Maybe i was just paranoid but the "!" on your every sentence is like you're not happy with his comment.

Anyway heres mine,
The storyline can be more detailed and think like a more hard reason for red to go to another adventure.So basically i want to read a much longer storyline,the storyline atm is not really detailed enough,maybe you can write more to make me understand.

For the maps,the maps are the same with fire red maps,only diffirence is the tilemis there a reason for this?maybe you can change the maps as red have been gone along time from his home so the maps can be changed abit,owh yeah,i like your tiles of choice.They look great together,cheers for it.lol

I would suggest taking out the trainer from the first town since the first town where we player ready ourself to went to the other areas..lol,maybe you can put up an event to have a battle there.Btw,do the dialga event happen at the start of the hack,i mean,like after we got our pokemon and adventure abit to other town,we will see the event?I forgot how the lapras event looks like so i can't comment on it.

Just fix up the spelling.I really love your choice of tiles..hahax.

Good luck on this hack,will hoping to see the new story soon..hahax

Click to expand...

yeah i will fix the story!

Darkerm said:

I really like your World Map. Btw your maping need some work. Good luck and hope can play beta/Alpha very soon.

Click to expand...

Well i need a mapper for viridian city and make the city a bit bigger!

Binary said:

I doubt he was connecting to the progress you've made thus far and nor was he rating your progress. He was commenting on your features. And I'm guessing the '1%' is the amount of progress you've done in implementing that particular feature.
Well, some people do care about the CSS.
Anyways, it's looking good. Good luck on it.

Click to expand...

OH okay thxs btw

NEW UPDATE BUT TINY ONE!:



EDIT
BIG UPDATE: YAY! Viridian Updated!!:

I know it has alot of errors, i will fix it ASAP!

Hey, I've got an idea. If you won't remap towns, the least you could do is remap routes. I mean, routes is where the majority of the exploring happens.

Theres pallete errors on the Cut trees and The door?
and Oak's lab i think is blocked by posts

This has not been edited expect one tree has been taken out and the PC and Mart and Cliffs changed :/

Capital letters a lot where they shouldnt be ;P

Apart form that the hack looks goood :)

Nintendork15 said:

Theres pallete errors on the Cut trees and The door?
and Oak's lab i think is blocked by posts

This has not been edited expect one tree has been taken out and the PC and Mart and Cliffs changed :/

Capital letters a lot where they shouldnt be ;P

Apart form that the hack looks goood :)

Click to expand...

Soirry i forgot to post the fixed screen shots btw i edited the Screen Shots!
and now heres an update :
Giovanni tries to attack you at route 1:

Big change!:
well i am changing story so the new story is:
Heroes/Heroens Story:

Region Story:

To be honest, IMPROVE your grammar and maps.
I can't be bothered to read something with awful grammar.

Okay, definitely some problems but sounds awesome.

For one, some tiles go over the player, a big oopsie (Fixing that is easy in Adv. Map, if you know how)

Two, the flower arrangement around 0:22 in the second movie (as that looks much more improved) is too linear, doing it in a zig-zag pattern looks much nicer on the eyes.

Three, from 0:10-0:14, mom looks messed up. She looks like metal mom or something.

Four, outside of home, putting two signs right next to each other seems kinda redundant. Maybe put the wooden one over near Route 1, so you take up less script block when (hopefully) adding a script to not let the player leave Starter Town without a Pokemon.

Lastly, what happened to the door animation? This may sound picky, but it's kinda awkward seeing a door that doesn't open, then you going through it with the "wzzh" sound of the Pokecenter doors.

Last lastly, there are some edge errors in the Goivanni script:

The edge above Goivanni

Last last lastly, I like your sig. Plus the game looks fun. ^ ^

any news about the hack ?

CAN I BETA TEST????please

Teh Blazer said:

Okay, definitely some problems but sounds awesome.

For one, some tiles go over the player, a big oopsie (Fixing that is easy in Adv. Map, if you know how)

Two, the flower arrangement around 0:22 in the second movie (as that looks much more improved) is too linear, doing it in a zig-zag pattern looks much nicer on the eyes.

Three, from 0:10-0:14, mom looks messed up. She looks like metal mom or something.

Four, outside of home, putting two signs right next to each other seems kinda redundant. Maybe put the wooden one over near Route 1, so you take up less script block when (hopefully) adding a script to not let the player leave Starter Town without a Pokemon.

Lastly, what happened to the door animation? This may sound picky, but it's kinda awkward seeing a door that doesn't open, then you going through it with the "wzzh" sound of the Pokecenter doors.

Last lastly, there are some edge errors in the Goivanni script:

The edge above Goivanni

Last last lastly, I like your sig. Plus the game looks fun. ^ ^

Click to expand...

that screen is scrap!

Tcoppy said:

CAN I BETA TEST????please

Click to expand...

Sure PM meh!

and here are the teasers!
1:
2: