Help & Advice Thread

I was wondering something. I noticed whenever I heat a corn-dog in my microwave the cornbread around the hot-dog always splits open. But if I heat it for less time it's too cold to eat. How do I heat a corn-dog in the microwave without the corn-bread splitting open?

Konekodemon said:

I was wondering something. I noticed whenever I heat a corn-dog in my microwave the cornbread around the hot-dog always splits open. But if I heat it for less time it's too cold to eat. How do I heat a corn-dog in the microwave without the corn-bread splitting open?

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Follow the corn dog's microwaving directions? I mean, I'm not sure how else to describe it without getting into the science of why it happens.

The reason the corn dog batter breaks open is due to the moisture content. The molecules being generated by the microwave's radiation react to the moisture content, thus evaporating from water into steam. When you don't have enough heat, the water molecules will still be packed closely with one another and won't feel warm at all. When you apply too much heat, the moisture becomes evaporated and sucked out from the contents, thus why the breading can break open more easily.

gimmepie said:

Hi
You know you can always talk to me smh

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I didnt want to send you something sensitive without warning, which is why I posted here. Anyways, I'm feeling a lot better now (I think I got a lot of it out messaging another member here) and I think I have a good mindset going forward, but if you want to know what happened Ill tell you in a PM. Telling others seems to help me.

My parents take away my computer and phone at night, but that's one of the few times I have for leisure... I need help

Anime Psyclone said:

My parents take away my computer and phone at night, but that's one of the few times I have for leisure... I need help

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I dunno, you might need to explain it to them or make some kind of compromise. I don't really think any of us can,
1) usurp your parents authority and regulatory of devices.
2) actually give you a device to use.

It's probably something you'll have to talk with them about. It can help if you understand why they are doing it and then trying to find some king of fear calmer or middle ground to stand on.

I tried doing what you suggested already and it didn't go well

If you are old enough to get a job, get one and buy your own devices, tucking them away somewhere so they don't get taken away.

If not, then I'm not really sure what you can do without knowing more information. Do your parents expect you to be doing something else at that time? Do you think they do it because you have a history of staying up too late on your devices? Is it only on school nights or every night?

It's every night and its because I do have a history of staying up

The only reason why I could think of why your parents would take away your phone and computer at night would be because they want you to study and go to bed early for School tomorrow. My mom always wanted me to go to bed early even when I didn't have School the next day but I would just ignore her and stay up late.

But I go to a virtual school..

Anime Psyclone said:

It's every night and its because I do have a history of staying up

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Okay, so you might not like this idea but here's what the deal probably is: You lost the privilege of using your devices at night because you abused those privileges too many times. Chances are the only way for you to get those privileges back is to show your parents that you can be responsible by going to real sleep (Not faking it :P) at a reasonable time, especially on school nights. If you show you can do that over enough time, then they might give you your devices back.

The work is not over then, though. Once you get them back, you have to show that you can use them responsibly at night, go to sleep at a normal time and NOT just go right back to the way you were doing things. Maybe it sucks to have some of your time cut off at night, but that is better than having ALL of your device time cut off, ya?

Besides, if you stay up late using the internet, and have to go to school the next day, isn't it worse to have to do so when being dead tired? I made the mistake of doing that through my schooling, and I suffered worse because of it.

Friend issues

So, hello.

I want to talk about something that bothers me to hell from the past months.

A friend of mine, that was actually my best friend for a long time now, suddenly decides to stay away from me and almost completely ignore me. He's been doing this for months and he says he 'can't stand being around me, and feels awful when doing so'.

He is on my class from 2 years now, and we used to do everything together, we planned a lot of stuff (even create our own Pok?mon Gen).

What I've been feeling is a muxture of anger, pain, low self-esteem and anxiety. I have already talked to my psychologist about it and she said that I should wait until classes come back and see if he takes an attitude, and if not so, I should start looking for someone else to be friends with.

I know he must have his reasons, but I cant understand or get it right now, and it really bothers me every single day.

Anyway, that's it, I hope you can express your opinions.

Have you asked him? I can't tell from your post; I'd assume if you were given the answers of he can't stand being around, you have.

Honestly, if that's the case and he's treating you like this, despite how much it's saying it hurts you, he doesn't care. He doesn't care about your feelings and friendship.
And for someone like that, let go. You don't want them as a friend anyway.

You can only speculate for sure what caused it, but you may never know. Some people have no logical reasons for a lot of things they do; they just go on feelings and can't describe it themselves.

You can find a better friend, don't worry. Online or off.

But he really do (or did) understand my feelings, I trusted him all along. I always shared difficult times with him and he was very comprehensive. But then, one day, he decides to avoid speaking with me

I really don't think he hates me/disregard my feelings in any way. And I don't remember doing something to upset him to the point of completely abscence.

He has been passing through mental problems for a time, and I really tried to help how I could, but I don't know. I really wanted to talk to him about this.

But that's the thing. At one point, he probably did, but the important thing is he clearly doesn't NOW.

You can't cling on what is clearly no longer true.

Is he acting this way around others as well, or is it just you? If the former...well, no matter how much you may want to support him, you can't force him to talk. Whether or not he chooses to confide in you in his choice, and whether you like it or not, if you're his friend, you'll respect his right to privacy and personal space and give him the time he needs to come to you...if that is indeed what he decides to do.

Sometimes, people face problems that they just don't feel confident or capable of discussing with others, and there isn't much you can do but give them time. You've made it clear to him that you're still there for him if he wants it. The ball, as they say, is in his court now.

If it's just you...well, if he won't give you an explanation, then you're better off without such a person in your life. If you did something wrong, and you're willing to apologise and make amends if necessary, that is all you can do. If he's not going to discuss disagreements maturely, it's a waste of your time to try and reach out to him.

Either way, you need input from him if you're going to continue being friends. It's frustrating and upsetting to lose people, especially if it's sudden and seemingly without explanation as this seems to be, but people are inherently self-centered creatures, and there isn't a whole lot you can do when someone decides to shut you out. I'm not saying you should forget about him and move on immediately - unless he's mistreating you - but right now, it sounds to me as though you've done everything you can.

It's hard to say if he is treating only me this way, or others as well, but I see that he gets along with some people (mostly my friends Gabriel and Aline) normally like he did before this whole episode.

Following your psychologist's advice sounds like a good plan, if you don't want to confront him directly about this again. From what you've said, he hasn't offered much of an explanation - WHY does he feel that way towards you now? If he'll answer that, then maybe you can discuss things with him and make amends...or at least feel better about going your separate ways.

I guess you're right, Dawn. I started to think more about myself few weeks ago and avoid creating personal dramas in my mind that are mostly not true.

I'm only 2 years now to finish secondary and should probably start thinking in what I want to do in my life. That's what she (my psychologist) said in the last session.

Letting go of someone who has been a close friend, especially when you don't see the reason or cause to do so, can be difficult and painful to do. But you definitely need to put your own mental health and wellbeing first, and this person's attitude and behaviour towards you sound like they've been a real detriment. It really is best to just let other people carry on with drama, if that's what they want to do: you're not responsible for the way they think and act, and if they're not going to tell you why they react to you the way they do, you can hardly be held accountable for that either. There can be no progress without communication, and if you're being blanked out, it really is best not to bother.

If he does a sudden 180 in personality, though, be careful, OK? If there is a genuine grievance and you manage to work it out, there's no reason why you can't continue your friendship if that's what you want. But don't let yourself be used or led along. Personal issues are no excuse to mistreat other people, and being told that he "can't stand being around" you definitely qualifies as mistreating. By all means, be civil and friendly, but don't allow him to abuse your trust like that a second time.