Age Gaps?

BonkersRider

BonkersRider

Twisted Fashion Gal
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    Is there an age gap between you and your significant other? How many years is too much? Or do you even care? Share your feelings with us.


    There is an age gap of 5 years between me and my wife. It doesn't matter too much now but when I first met her I was 19 and she was 14.
    I was in college at the time and was working as a tutor to make ends meat. Her parents hired me to give her some advanced teachings to help her have an edge in her college prep school. I became a family friend and we gradually developed very strong feelings towards each other over the course of 3 years. We didn't express those feelings until she was 17, when I could not take it anymore and bore my soul revealing my love for her. She was overjoyed. Her family had hints that she might have been gay but they were not angry with her or with me about it.
     
    There's not much of an age gap between me and my boyfriend. I think he's about one or two years older. I don't think age matters in a relationship. It shouldn't matter at all as long as there is nothing sexual going on with a minor and someone over eighteen.
     
    I think once your both at least 17-18 then age doesn't matter. There's a big maturity difference between being say 14 and 18.

    I'm not dating anyone right now, but the biggest age gap for me was 2 years. She was 17, I was 19.
     
    Unfortunately don't have a significant other at the moment, but the only one I've been with was 3 months younger than myself. To be honest, mentally for some reason, I don't find it particularly attractive for my partner to be any older/younger than myself by a year; dating people who are 2+ years older doesn't feel right, to me. Others who have found significant others that have more of an age gap is perfectly fine with me, it's just not for me personally though.
     
    Age gaps don't really bother me when it comes to dating. In my opinion, I think its fine to be in love with someone who is like 10 years older than you. I think more than that can get a little much, but still, I'd say 10 is the cap when it comes to age and dating.
     
    I think too much of an age cap for too little of your age is definitely weird. However, my girlfriend and I are 10 days apart.

    God we have such a big age gap.
     
    The age gap between my significant other and I is around four months, so there is virtually no age gap between us.

    An age gap difference wouldn't bother me too much, unless the age difference is very significant like around the 15+ years range.
     
    I have a family friend who had a 15 year age gap with a past boyfriend. .o. So I'm under the impression that sometimes things just happen, and you can fall for someone prior to knowing their age. So I don't look down or judge relationships with big age gaps.

    I think for me.. if someone is 7 years older or younger than me, it would be awkward.

    I'm in my twenties, and I had a girl who was into me once who was 17 at the time, I didn't wanna go there because she wasn't even over 18.

    I'd prefer to have someone within 3 or 4 years of me, but if someone is 5 years or so then.. idk it could be worse. Like I said before, things happen. I act a lot younger than I am, and I also know some damn mature people, who end up being pretty young, so it's not always about age. My ex is 26, and is dating someone who's 17 right now, and she was 16 when they met. They struggled with it for a time, and didn't wanna do it, but they just click really well, and they're so like-minded. I'll be glad when the girl is 18, so they can feel less awkward about it. xD;
     
    My current boyfriend is about a year and a half older than me :) and 0.5" taller teehee!

    That said, my ex' was about seven and a half years older. I was fifteen and he was twenty-three. When I cut if off, I was twenty and he was twenty-seven. A year later, I reflect on it and realize that for my age, I was being taken advantage of, and a lot of sexual encounters were pressured onto me and unwanted (but I felt obliged to consent). I definitely don't think that an age gap at that age of that caliber is any good :( I did at the time, but again, reflecting it was 100% a bad idea and situation.

    If you're >30 and that gap exists, it's a little more acceptable because both parties are equally experienced and knowledgeable of their own desires, feelings, maturity, etc. On a general basis, though, I'd think upwards of four years is normal.
     
    The most significant person to me isn't my girlfriend (She would have to exist for that to be true..... huuuuuuuuuuu......), it's a girl that I really like. She's the same age as me, just a month or so younger. I've never dated anyone who was more than 2 years younger than me. I think that in school, they need to be in your grade range (Elementary, Middle, and High). For example, a middle schooler should date other middle schoolers, and same goes for high schoolers, and people in elementary generally should date in the first place, just very close friends. Out of school, the most I would say for an age gap would be about 7-8 years. At 10 it gets just a little to much. My parents are 6 years apart, and I think it's perfect. I also generally prefer for the male to be older. I've always found it weird for the girl to be older.
     
    I've only been with people a year behind or ahead of me, so I haven't really experienced an age gap. I knew a couple who were 6 years apart, and...well, one of them was quiiiite underage. Bordering on...well, I'll let you figure that out yourself. It made me nauseous. I think about 3 years is enough, maybe an extra year if you're around 17-18.
     
    My err...somewhat girlfriend is about eight months older than me, so our age difference is more or less insignificant. XD
     
    For me, my biggest age gap was that the other was +5 years older that myself. It didn't last long for other reasons, oh wait, wait, uh, that wasn't it actually, my oldest age gap was at most, nine or ten years apart? It was something like that. I honestly don't mind age gaps as much as I wish I would, but I got very mature very fast, in a mental sort of manner, so in the end, I just wanted to actually have a relationship that can actually understand me, the way that I understand other people.
     
    I don't have a boyfriend, but if I were to have one, I'd probably not want him to be over a year or so younger or over three years older than me. I've heard of the "half age +7 of the older person" rule, which works starting at age 14 and gets progressively less accurate as the years go by. It seems like a fine enough guideline to follow for me until, like, age 25 or so.
     
    Between me and my last two exes there's been about 4 or 5 years age difference. I don't really find much of a problem with age difference until you get into the teens. Like my dad and his gf are 10 years apart and that's probably where I'd cross the line. I mean thinking about it if you have 10+ years between you you were already in or finished with elementary school by the time they were even born.
     
    I dislike the idea of using a rule like that to determine who is okay to love.
    I used to be totally against the idea of an age difference, because I was brought up that way, but as I saw more and more relationships with significant age differences going well and saw this becoming more common I started to think "well hang on, surely it is better to have a lasting and loving relationship with an age difference than a two week one without".

    So yes, I came to believe that a long-lasting and loving relationship came before concerns about age and then with my new beliefs in tow I proceeded to fall for someone a few years younger than myself. We still love each other very much, but unlike her family mine were not okay with difference and my mother went to extreme lengths to force us to split up. So now we're just waiting until there's literally nothing that can be done about our relationship - either with me finding the resources to move out (not likely for some time) or with her crossing over that magical line that makes you suddenly an adult.

    Our relationship was not illegal, I did a ♥♥♥♥load of research to make sure of that. I feel the need to stress that. So, there you go.
     
    I don't think there's a rule for age gaps... It all varies depending on the people in that relationship. Personally I like being the younger one in a relationship, as long as the age gap isn't too much (maybe 10+) but as I said it depends on him :) I think the problem with bug age gaps isn't really the age difference itself but rather the difference in views/opinions/maturity.
     
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