I saw her/him first!

Strdstwanderer

Strdstwanderer

We'll get to that tomorrow
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    Have you ever developed any romantic attraction to someone your friend is currently dating or at the very least someone your friend has a crush on? What do you do during this situation? And if you do have a crush on someone your friend has a crush on too, do you pursue that person? do you make it in to some sort of competition or do you just back away?
     
    I will back away, i will not break my friend's heart.
     
    Honestly, if I really had feelings for them, hell no I wouldn't back away. Unless I was told explicitly that they would rather be with my friend anyway and I'd never try and break a relationship just to benefit myself - certainly not if those in it were happy.

    There was one time, when I became interested in my friends girlfriend (another very good friend of mine) whilst they were still dating - and quite frankly he was treating her pretty badly. He dumped her and the next day I started dating her - which he was furious about even though he was the one that did the dumping.
     
    This hasn't happened since like middleschool lol. I think if something is meant to be it will find a way to be no matter what. I backed away then and I would back away now. In a way I'd feel like we would be competing for their attention and I hate the idea of lowering myself to that.
     
    If my friend is dating that person, I'll back away and move on. There's no way I'd ruin a friendship for some guy. Especially if I don't even know if it'll work out.

    If my friend is just crushing on a guy and I happen to like him too, of course I'll go for him. She doesn't own him. xD But I wouldn't tell her of course. At that point, I end up responding to how the guy in question responds. If he ends up liking me and not her, then what can either of us do about that? I'd go out with him. If he likes her, I'd back off. It's basically straight foreword.

    This girl in my high school literally got mad at me because her crush had a crush on me. The best part was that I didn't even like him back or anything but she still thought I was gunna steal him away. It's like girl, if he likes me, there's nothing I can do about it to make him stop. I told him I'm not interested, that's all I can do. xD
     
    This has happened a few times. Usually I back off to let my friend have a chance but it never ends well. Once in highschool my friend and I liked the same guy and then he left the school for a semester. He returned the next and she took him to prom and he admitted he only came back to the school to be around me. But we never really properly went out and he left the school at the end of the year anyway. I miss him. Pretty sure we're both married to different people now.
     
    I've never been in such a situation until now, but if I would be then I'd probably just back off because I wouldn't like to interfere with their relations and eventually just destroy everything :/
    But I'm sure my psyche would just go insane over it and build up a infinite hatred to, who would be that friend who has a crush on my crush, and would start to spam my mind with paranoid thoughts etc. etc.
     
    I will leave No woman Is worth, to brak a friend's heart for.
     
    I have crushes a lot, but never on someone my friend is with. My friends and I promised each other that we would never do that to each other, and so far all of us have kept our word.
    If my friend was dating someone I was into, I wouldn't back away, I would still make sure that his girlfriend knew that I was into her, but I wouldn't try to steal them away from my friend.
     
    I haven't ever been in any such situation so far. I wouldn't ever be a relationship destroyer - that's just beneath me, imo. I'd go for it if my friend just crushes on the girl like I do. Wouldn't back off if I actually really like the person.
     
    I went through this years ago but it was just a silly crush when I knew that my friend has a crush on that person I totally lost interest on him..I would never lose my friend for any reason,specially such reason.
     
    This happened in high school, right before I started going out with my ex and it was one of his close friends too. The 4 of us (the only Asians in science class) grouped and sat at a table together for 4 months so we got to know one another. Within a month, my best friend (at the time) and I had a crush on the same guy at the same time, but I figured that I wouldn't want any drama or problems between us so I backed off. That eventually worked out well because my ex and I dated, lasted for 3 years meanwhile they only lasted about 2 months \: When in actuality they only acted like a couple for 1 and started avoiding each other after that...But yeah. Should that ever happen, unless I'm completely in love with someone, I will back away.
     
    I have pretty good emotional restraint. I've been in my current relationship for just over six months now (the prior relationship lasted six years). I'm honestly the most loyal person in the world, and I keep my eyes to myself. Being in a relationship, everyone else is just "there." They're people, but they are without sex to me. I may platonically comment that someone has good features, but I mean nothing sexual nor do I mean to declare interest in that individual.

    Out of relationships, I stay away from stuff like that. If they're off the market, they're off the market. I'm not avidly looking, either. Sure, companionship is nice, and when I have it I am quite needy; however, I can go without it, and I definitely look at "taken" individuals the same way as I look at men and women during a relationship: asexually, platonically. Whatever you want to call it. They're just lifeforms, really.
     
    I would never take my friends girlfriend or anything. That'd just ruin a friendship and it's definitely not worth it! However, if we both have a crush on the girl, it's normally fair play. Whoever gets her, gets her. I've had a few instances like that and for the most part, neither of us won. Not every girl you talk to, you'll end up dating. However, I seem to normally have gotten texted back faster with longer replies. I guess I was just the better-looker. ;D
     
    I've had feelings for a friend before, and she never found out. Unless she guessed on her own, she probably still doesn't know. lmfao

    Though, also one time my friend and I had feelings for the same person. I met them first, and we clicked really well for a time, but then my friend came along and they clicked better. So I just ended up lucking out on that one, and my friend did say she felt ♥♥♥♥♥♥ about it - she even avoided me for some weeks because she didn't wanna face me and talk about it.

    If it were me, I can't say that I'd ever come between a friend and someone I knew they were into and had a chance with. :/
     
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