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Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted [V.2] [shh, no tears now, only dreams]

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Granted; after using it for three days, a wild Herobrine is released into your computer system. It toys with you, bringing up random, annoying popups of Skeletons and Silverfish, and redirecting you to SexyCreepers.com. You anger quickly and send your antivirus on a wild virus chase, doing deep scan after deep scan after deep scan to locate this acursed thing. Many days of using your antivirus to track it down pays off; you manage to back it into System32, where it can no longer run. As your cursor slow inches towards his file that you plan to delete, he pulls the ace out of his sleeve; all of System32 vanishes in front of your eyes. Before you know it, your entire computer shuts off completely. You sigh contently, finally getting rid of the evil thing, despite sacrificing your laptop. However, once you turn around, you catch sight of completely white eyes...

I wish I was a better storywriter.
 
Granted, you now suck at everything else

I wish for a big supply of chocolate milk
 
Granted; a large portion of the chocolate syrup sticks to the bottom and drains in your mouth as your finish each glass, leaving behind a bitter taste.

I wish would stop eating junk food.
 
Granted; you are now so overly happy that everyone thinks you're crazy and no longer associates with you.

I wish I had three more wishes.
 
Granted, but these wishes are limited to one parameter: they can only grant the wish to summon a train and squash you wish it, similar to asdf movie.

I wish that I had an army of trains commanded at the phrase, "I like trains."
 
Granted, but its poisoned. And you're also allergic to melons now.

I wish my wish wouldn't be corrupted.
 
Granted, you get run over by a mob of fans.

I wish I had a faster computer.
 
Granted. But its so fast, it grows feet and runs away from you, later using its technological advancement to build a time machine, go into 2016 to enter the Olympics, and beat Usain Bolt in the 100 meter dash.

I wish I actually had the ability to grant my own wishes, when really this is a hopeless attempt in attaining impossible dreams, only to be corrupted by another's subterfuge.
 
Granted, but you corrupt all your wishes yourself

I wish i had some food
 
Congratulations; you just got a lifetime supply of expired yogurt.
I wish the world liked me, as in the world hates me, not the people :(
 
Granted, you got strangled by two trees that are trying to hug you.

I wish I was a sponge like Spongebob!
 
ShadowExcadrill said:
Granted, but you corrupt all your wishes yourself

I wish i had some food
Click to expand...

I wish I had a pony!

Due to this notion, I have to corrupt it myself :( . My pony now has no legs...

jk! I wish that I had a pony with legs!
 
Granted, it has 2 legs only.
I wish the school bus would come here later.
(I know, I know, you might think I'll be late for school ;))
 
Granted, it. shall come in 70,000 years and you'll die waiting for the school bus.
I wish I was a starfish like Patrick! :)
 
Granted. You are now dumb.
I wish that this wish could never by corrupted by anyone but Skydoesminecraft.
 
Granted, but it gets corrupted before the wish is asked.
I wish I had donuts.
 
Granted, but the chocolate is secretly poop.

I wish for nothing!
 
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