Regrets.

[Mittens95]

Yeah, just needed to get this one out.

Years ago, I went through an 'edgelord' phase, yep! cringe culture, racism, ableism, so on and so forth. This is what many insecure teens/even college age adults (believe it or not - I Dm'd a best friend of mine from high school who's a university teacher as of rn, and he bombarded me with racist 4chan gunk. ugh.) High school just never ends for some people. Not to say that there are any excuses for what I've done however.

I still carry a lingering sense of guilt, and wish that I could get myself to apologize to said victims (From HS, on reddit, various social networking platforms and to bluntly put it; even here on PC.) But I just don't know how to approach without (presumably) getting turned down.

It is what it is I suppose. There was a song a friend of mine recommended to me a while back called 'Rivers and Roads' - lyrics here touch upon this. Super hard hitting despite the track being overproduced pastiche Starbucks-core indie folk. And I've been resonating to this old favorite track of mine more than ever before.

So anybody else here know this feeling? This melancholy over regrets from projecting insecurities over others, and feeling like I can't be forgiven or unable to make up for damages adequately?

 

[Zeostar]

I was very shy through 6th-8th grade, so I sometimes think back and wish I spoke more.

 

[pastelspectre]

i regret many things in my life. one of the main things being not standing up for myself against my bullies in middle school, but i don't really like to dwell on the past and think "what if". i try not to think about it, but it is difficult sometimes.

 

[Aslan]

I do regret how I acted when I first opened up about depression and anxiety - I had been holding so much in that looking back on it now with a rational perspective, it must have been very overwhelming and exhausting to be around me at the time. The newfound support was a lot for me - so I think I used it too much and relied too heavily on other people for support. I regret how much pressure that would put on people but instead of wallowing in it, I decided I just needed to change and organise my own help as my friends can't always be there to lean on. In a way, recognising that regret has been good because I've been a lot more proactive in helping myself.

I also regret a lot of things I have done or said, but not much I can do but move on and just keep striving to improve for the future.

 

[pkmin3033]

If I think about it I have more regrets in my life than I do moments I can be proud of, but...well, I don't really have time for them. Regretting things doesn't accomplish anything, other than to create more regrets about opportunities missed. So yeah.

 

[Corrin]

I let people walk all over me because I'm not sure how to be assertive.
Whenever I try and stick up for myself, it comes off aggressive.

 

[colours]

I have a ton of regrets. As much as I dwell over them (because depression, yay), I can't really go into the past and fix whatever I regret doing.

So I take those experiences and learn from them in the hopes that it would make me a better person in the future.