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'The truth hurts, a lie's worse'

Manitee

Manitee

bury me alive
    • 266
    Posts
    11
    Years
    I thought this would be interesting...

    So let's say you're really talkative and like to talk about yourself a lot but don't really realise that you're like that, would you rather somebody tell you straight that you're self absorbed or for them to not say anything and just keep their feelings inside?

    Would being told the truth hurt your feelings or not, to put it bluntly.
     
    I always appreciate the truth, really. Maybe in the moment I (or any person in this situation) might get offended or something, but afterward they have a chance to think about it and know how others perceive them, and I think that's quite healthy.
     
    Please tell me the truth, not matter how much you may think it could possibly hurt. Seriously, I don't like people beating around the bush; if you don't like me, straight out tell me instead of ignoring me. But in regards to being self-absorbed, I honestly don't think I talk about myself that often because I'm not that interesting of a person. I'd much prefer someone feeling comfortable enough to tell me the truth no matter what, instead of lying to me.
     
    Different people think different things of other people~ (that was so vague lemme try to clarify the point in my head that seems so clear into words that make sense...) In a lot of cases, people's traits are gonna be in a grey area where to some, it may seem like they're one thing, but to others, it may seem like another. It's nice to know what people think, but I don't think you can ever take it as a surefire granted thing, and you shouldn't take it to heart. Some people say I'm really laid back, others see me as a control freak! I think I'm actually probably in between the two, but I'm aware that people will have different perspectives on what I am.

    In a nutshell, yes, it's nice to share what you think of people. If there's people that don't like an honest open friendship with you, they're probably not the best people for you to be talking to. If they do, then obviously it's nice to know you're both genuinely on the same page.

    And well, I also think that people shouldn't take "truths" about themselves too deeply to heart, either. Perspective is a strange old beast.
     
    I would rather them tell the truth so that I can work on that in the future and not have that bad trait for the rest of my life.
     
    I would rather not be told. If this person is close enough to me to be such a good friend/relationship then they obviously like me enough despite this 'secret flaw' to still behave normally around me and they obviously still like my personality enough to call me a friend - what good does it do bringing up some awkward thing that you won't be able to stop fixating about just because someone that already likes you loads could like you that little bit extra? At the end of the day you are who you are, and if people keep bringing up things about you that you should change then they obviously don't approve of that, and they're not what I'd call a close friend. This is probably very narrow-minded though! (Of course criticism about work/etc is a completely different story, I actively encourage that, just not things about personality/appearance/etc).

    Bonus points for Broken Strings by the way!
     
    Me, personally, I'm a tolerant person. If there's something that you aren't fond of, or something you think needs my attention, you should talk to me about it, even if I try to explain the why behind it afterward if it has one. There are probably aspects of myself I'm not aware that I have, I think there's a few people who could say that as well, and it could be that the reason I don't know about it is because no one has brought it up.
     
    The truth may or may not hurt; regardless, I'd rather be told the real deal. I don't want to live a life of deception, and I'm honest myself (or as honest as I can be; everyone lies). Tact is important, though. Kinda makes me a hypocrite for saying that, but it's true (hah).
     
    People are subjective beings, so what's self absorbed to someone may not be to another. Still, if someone feels I'm being self absorbed, then I would really appreciate that they tell me so I can stop. Though, honestly, I don't see much of an issue with someone being self absorbed. I think that's human nature.
     
    Aerial Ace said:
    People are subjective beings, so what's self absorbed to someone may not be to another. Still, if someone feels I'm being self absorbed, then I would really appreciate that they tell me so I can stop. Though, honestly, I don't see much of an issue with someone being self absorbed. I think that's human nature.
    Click to expand...

    He pretty much said what I was going to say.
     
    If someone was being to talkative to me, I'd probably just tell them I prefer things to be chill and quiet. I wouldn't say something like "you're too talkative" or "stop being so talkative, it's annoying." Take it situation by situation. I'd hope someone would do the same for me, but most likely people would bottle it up or be overly blunt about it.
     
    I have actually had a friend tell me this before and it improved our friendship quite a bit! I always want to know if a friend sees flaws in me so I can improve upon them and make the base of the friendship as strong as possible. Although I wouldn't be able to do the same for a friend haha. I am too nice
     
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