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We're drifting apart cause we all do...

Soari

  • 2,496
    Posts
    18
    Years
    • Age 25
    • Seen Aug 26, 2015
    Have you ever lost touch with a bosom friend and now wish you had stayed in contact with them? Is there any chance of reconciliation? Could you drift apart from your loved ones if it was meant for their happiness?

    Well, I've become more distant with plenty of friends here as well as in real life. I've left them for a good reason either because I don't think I am going to be a good influence on them.That, and they actually don't deserve to be part of my circle of friends. I think it's better off if I just disappeared rather than dragged it out. To be honest, I feel a lot better without them, though I do regret losing touch with most of the ones who I truly consider as my close friends.
     
  • 12,201
    Posts
    18
    Years
    Not really. I stay in touch with all my friends if I want to keep them as a friend.
    If I have wronged them, I will happily step up and apologise.

    The friends I no longer talk to are because they have changed into people that I no longer like =[
     
  • 3,509
    Posts
    15
    Years
    • Seen Nov 5, 2017
    "bosom friend" I'm not sure what this is, but I don't really consider to myself to have been especially close to any of my former friends, I assume that's what this title is suggesting.

    But as for just drifting from friends, yeah it happens all the time. I sometimes just wipe the slate clean, cut off all contact from every single person I know and just start brand new. I've done that about 4 times now. I've had some thoughts of regret about some of them, but ultimately I know I am better off without any of them. Now I'm just really picky with who I choose to be friends, even then there are plenty that end up being nothing but disappointing.

    I've never cut myself off from someone because I think they'll be better off without me. It's always because I'm sure I'll be better off without them. There's been one occasion where a close friend nearly cut herself off from me, but in the end realised it's not what she wanted.

    Sometimes it's just obvious that things won't work out, and if a friendship has more negativity than positivity then there's no point in it existing.
     

    Kevin

    kevin del rey
  • 2,686
    Posts
    13
    Years
    Well, yes I have a certain friend I wish I could still contact... But I dunno how to, but I wish I could.
    But mostly all of the rest of my friends are still my friends.
    There are some I'm glad that they're not in my life anymore, and feel more calm without them. I only regret losing one of them.
     

    Yume Tsuki

    (/ ゚ヮ゚)/彡 ┻━┻
  • 1,196
    Posts
    15
    Years
    There are a few friends from which I reget to have lost contact with them :(
    It just seems impossible to come in touch with them again... I think I don't have the guts to face them again... It's not like I had fights with them it was just like the contact just vanished slowly.
     

    Margot

    some things are that simple
  • 3,661
    Posts
    18
    Years
    • they/he
    • Seen Apr 16, 2022
    Yeah :/ with both friends from here and irl. with my online friends, we all started college and everyones lives got busy, fights happened within the group, and they just went their different ways and we stopped speaking. I'm bummed about it, but I haven't stopped caring about them, and I'll still say hi on their birthdays or something. we just don't speak like we used to.

    Then irl it's pretty much the exact same thing: going off to college, fights, and not having time between school and work to really talk or hang out. I do see these friends however during breaks which is nice :) like now since everyone's home on holiday!
     

    PlatinumDude

    Nyeh?
  • 12,964
    Posts
    13
    Years
    In fact, yes, when I was in elementary school. There was this girl that I always wanted to hang out with, but we don't keep in touch anymore.
     
  • 14,097
    Posts
    19
    Years
    Too many times to count. I was a military brat growing up. As soon as I moved away, I lost touch with my old friends. It still carries over to this day. I'm just awful at long-distance relationships. :/

    It's not as common on the Internet, but still happens, sadly. Sometimes I wonder how my old friends are doing.
     

    King Gumball

    Haven't been here for ages...
  • 2,179
    Posts
    13
    Years
    I have sort of lost contact with all my primary school friends. Not that I don't make the effort to try get together some time, they just don't, so I cant be bothered trying to get get-togethers happening anymore :/
     

    Sydian

    fake your death.
  • 33,379
    Posts
    16
    Years
    If I no longer talk to someone, then I probably have a good reason. Otherwise, I do keep in touch with my friends.
     

    Ayselipera

    Guest
  • 0
    Posts
    I'm sure it's happened to everyone. Friends come and go and that's life. I've drifted away from a lot of friends over the past two years or so just because we're growing up and so we don't exactly find each other as fun or interesting as we did before. We still make small talk when we see each other, but it's definitely a group of friendships that have passed.

    Even though moving away from a friendship can be hard, usually when it's a close one, you still get to keep all the good memories you have of them which is like a little bittersweet gift at the end. Although it's nice to know that when I mention these same memories to my former close friends they'll admit to me that they have been thinking about the same things also. Makes me feel a bit better about the whole drifting apart situation.

    Reconciliation is always possible if the right things happen at the right times. I still hold all my former friends in a good regard and I know they also do for me so I don't see why we can't rekindle the friendship flame somewhere down the road. Just now is not the right time.

    Overall moving on can be sad and sometimes hard if the friendship really meant something to you, but it's just one of those things everyone has to go through at some point. People grow apart, but there is always a chance you can grow right back together.
     

    Skip Class

    previously zappyspiker, but rainbow keeps trying t
  • 4,717
    Posts
    15
    Years
    You can put it in a way that we "grew out of each other". The only contact we have is through Facebook yet we still don't really talk to each other. It's usually the "Happy Birthday" that we really speak to each to other
     

    RYOUKI

    survive the world.
  • 3,252
    Posts
    17
    Years
    Some friends come and go. Other leaves and others stay for a reason.

    I would love to meet my best friends backs in elementary school to see how they've all been, although frankly, if I manage to meet them on the street, I'd probably wont recognize them.
     

    Melody

    Banned
  • 6,460
    Posts
    19
    Years
    I drift quite a lot, I'm just a drifter. It's not like I try to drift away, it's just that sometimes I simply have nothing more to converse about...and I always feel bad once I run any subject into the ground. I simply don't open up easily to a person unless they're really friendly, kind and interactive...you've gotta really keep my interest somehow.

    With all of that being said, I deeply love and appreciate all of my friends (in a platonic way). I'm just not good with keeping contact because life and being shy is just not a good mix. D8

    It's such a pain in the neck, that I am so shy and gentle. Sure, I can put on a show or two, and I do have thick skin so to speak, but it doesn't remedy the entire friendship drift problem. :/
     
  • 3,901
    Posts
    14
    Years
    In real life and on here. Quite a few members I once known have left. Pity :(.

    But do I do it intentionally? Yes and No. Sometimes I want people to leave me alone, and they get offended and stop contacting me or just plain ignore me.

    And yeah, assuming I loved a human being in my lifetime I would do anything for them, even if it meant leaving for their well being.
     
  • 14,092
    Posts
    14
    Years
    There are a few I've lost contact with, mostly due to extenuating circumstances. Most of them moved far away, and this was in the days before Facebook/Twitter/Youtube/webcams. (if you can believe that) so getting back in touch was hard.

    Facebook and proficient stalking skills have helped rectify that though.
     

    BHwolfgang

    kamikorosu
  • 3,906
    Posts
    15
    Years
    When it was time to move up to High School, I basically lost most of my friends. Almost everyone went to the one across the street, while the rest were scattered across the county. I tried to keep in touch with as many as I could, but eventually we drifted apart from each other so much that there was no way of fixing it.

    It's been a few years since that day and I still don't communicate with any of them.

    This also applies to online friendship as well. Out of my friends list, only about half are still active members of this site. The rest are either gone for good or on a hiatus. That, or I'm the one on hiatus and that just tears us even more apart.

    It's just sad that I lost contact with so many people over the past. People come and go, but they'd be forever missed.
     

    Elite Overlord LeSabre™

    On that 'Non stop road'
  • 9,955
    Posts
    16
    Years
    Some of my high school friends and I drew apart when I went to college. I've been able to locate many of them through Facebook but we still don't talk all that much. Some people I remember more than others but there are some that I truly do miss talking to on a regular basis.
     
  • 109
    Posts
    14
    Years
    • WA
    • Seen Jul 19, 2012
    I lost my two best friends in elementary school, they moved away because their parents were in the military.

    That's pretty much it, though.
     
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