What's your favorite jokes?

インフェルノの津波

Seriously?
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    Post them here!(Yutohru or whatever, if this belongs in OT okay)

    Mine:

    A military sergeant is on a plane with other lieutenants because they are preforming a parachute test. The sergeant sees one lieutenant shaking, so he asked

    "Scared lieutenant?"
    "Apprehensive, sir."
    "What's the difference?"
    "It means I'm scared, but with a university education."

    Next

    A grandson staying over at his grandfather's house is looking through his old military photos and asks, "What's this costume?" He was pointing to a man wearing navy blues.

    "That's not a costume, kid. Men have died for that uniform." His grandfather growls.

    "So you stole it then?"

    Next

    My father is so awesome, he can go outside for years and come back with a new mommy!(Corny)

    And now your turn.
     
    Dirty Jokes

    And I'm not telling one.

    Do you tell them, or does anyone you know does? What're your opinions on them?

    Me, I think dirty jokes means

    A) You have a seriously messed up mind
    B) You've actually took serious thought into making this disgusting joke?
    C) If you've wanted to annoy me or disgust me, congrats, you just have.
     
    Oh crap, I was expecting a thread for telling dirty jokes >_<'

    As you can see, I like telling dirty jokes when the opportunity arises. Don't like it? Sue me.
     
    You see, there was this family that was pitching their entertaining new magic trick to this traveling talent scout...owait, this definitely isn't an appropriate joke for PC. >_<

    Between the extensive time I spent amongst boy scouts when I was younger, my racist family, and exposure to /b/, I've an encyclopedic knowledge of all kinds of dirty jokes, ranging the spectrum from immature potty humor to offensive to any given minority group to downright morbid. I don't judge. If it's funny, it's funny, even if its way outside the realms of societal acceptance. XD
     
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    Oh my...like, yeah I know so many people telling them D:
    It's almost natural if you do, and they think you aren't normal if you don't.
    I don't, I hate them.

    They are not even funny to me. The S with three letters word is gaining to much field in society, imo...And it's consumming true jokes. :c
     
    Sometimes they're funny, sometimes they're not.
    Pissed me off when some overused "That's what she said" >_>;
    But still I make dirty jokes but not like every minute. >:
     
    Wow, my bro and his friends simply HATE it when I catch one of them with a "That's what she said" All any of them can do is reply with a "**** you! ;_;" And then when they try to get back it's just nothing but failure in their parts and even they acknowledge it.

    Then again, the sad part is I'm messing with 11 year olds like this >_<"
     
    i enjoy dirty jokes and people who enjoy dirty jokes with me. no one likes unclever or overused dirty jokes, but im more annoyed by prudes tBqH~
     
    I don't really like dirty jokes.
    As SinisterEternity said, people will think you're weird or stupid if you don't laugh or participate with them about their jokes.
    But it's not funny...To my mind, it's not.
    Perhaps I wouldn't have this opinion if I didn't hear that kind of jokes everyday. I'm fed up about it, but I can't do anything.​
     
    donavannj said:
    I frankly think that someone is too uptight if they can't laugh at a single dirty joke... unless they are too young to get it.
    Click to expand...

    I know what you mean, Donn. There're those who are just anti-social or whatever enough not to laugh at dirty jokes, but there also are those who can't see what's funny about those jokes because they have had some personal experience which made them hate anything related to that kind of things. Not saying that they heard bad Dirty Jokes which made them hate them, not at all.

    Saying that, because I honestly don't have anything against people who are doing those jokes, it's the thing itself that bothers me and it's due to a personal experience I had if I hate hearing that kind of jokes now.
     
    donavannj said:
    I frankly think that someone is too uptight if they can't laugh at a single dirty joke... unless they are too young to get it.
    Click to expand...

    Nope, it's got nothing to do with being too uptight.

    It had everything to do with "they just aren't funny and they're dirty".

    That is what I think of dirty jokes. They don't make me laugh, I don't see the humour value in them even if I try to. I just don't see what's funny about them or why other people laugh at them. All they do is make me cringe. I have tried to enjoy them and laugh at them under pressure to conform to my peers but it only made me feel dirty. I just don't bother any more.

    If to you being too uptight is having a sense of decency, then I'd far rather be "too uptight" than descend into the kind of dirt that you guys value so much in your humour. There is nothing to be proud for enjoying dirty humour. One thing I notice in people is that if you don't enjoy the same depraved things that others do they try to drag you down to their low, often by making you feel like an outcast by calling you too uptight or a prude until you give in and descend to their level. They make it seem like it's a bad thing to have standards so that you feel bad for holding to your standards.

    I call bs.
     
    (Sorry, I HAD TO!)
    Spoiler:

    Please tell me you didn't laugh, then...

    ...Someone continue the joke and I bet he'll laugh.



    Anyway, I do laugh from dirty jokes as long as they are not too disgusting for my taste.
     
    I'm not usually the one who tells dirty jokes, but I know people who do tell them. Some are funny, but some are just not.
     
    Beechlgz said:
    Nope, it's got nothing to do with being too uptight.

    It had everything to do with "they just aren't funny and they're dirty".

    That is what I think of dirty jokes. They don't make me laugh, I don't see the humour value in them even if I try to. I just don't see what's funny about them or why other people laugh at them. All they do is make me cringe. I have tried to enjoy them and laugh at them under pressure to conform to my peers but it only made me feel dirty. I just don't bother any more.

    If to you being too uptight is having a sense of decency, then I'd far rather be "too uptight" than descend into the kind of dirt that you guys value so much in your humour. There is nothing to be proud for enjoying dirty humour. One thing I notice in people is that if you don't enjoy the same depraved things that others do they try to drag you down to their low, often by making you feel like an outcast by calling you too uptight or a prude until you give in and descend to their level. They make it seem like it's a bad thing to have standards so that you feel bad for holding to your standards.

    I call bs.
    Click to expand...

    If you didn't notice, I said a single dirty joke. I implied it to most likely be a fairly tame dirty joke - I know, I know, that's an oxymoron to many, but I'm talking relatively here. And I didn't say I favor dirty jokes over any other kind of joke, since my personal favorites tend to be too nerdy for the non-geek.

    And you imply that not being able to laugh at a single dirty joke is the only way to have a sense of decency, which is wholly not true. Dirty jokes cover a broad spectrum of uncleanliness. It could literally be a joke about a person covered with dirt or grime, and I'd still call it a dirty joke. (b'-')b
     
    I've got not problem with them. It's not like they're hurting anyone, and if you're disgusted by them, methinks you're taking things a bit too seriously. Then again, maybe I'm a bit biased, I rarely get disgusted by anything.
     
    JOKES ARE SERIOUS BUSINESS, GUYS. DON'T LAUGH.

    But I guess you can't blame somebody from shying away from "sensitive topics". What's funny for you might be disgusting to somebody else. Diff'rent strokes for diff'rent folks and all that...
     
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