Anxiety.

[Nick]

I've noticed that a fair number of people here - myself included - have one or more cases of anxiety.

What about you? Do you have anxiety? Which kinds? How has it affected your life, your relationships, and your perception of the world and of yourself?



Note there's a difference between anxiety and feeling anxiousness.

 

[Oryx]

I used to think that I had some kind of anxiety, but I'm a responsible internetter so I refused to self-diagnose and never wanted to go to a professional, so I would never characterize it as an actual disorder. Over the years I've managed to get over a lot of it so I either never had an actual disorder or I did a good job at handling it myself.

Before though, I had really bad reactions to small things. Like asking a stranger a question would make me tear up in nervousness, travelling would make me puke, I would let support take 3 days instead of 20 minutes because I didn't want to talk on the phone. I got over it with a combination of forcing myself outside my comfort zone and taking along my figurative security blankie: my boyfriend who I could fall back on if things got too hard.

 

[£]

Anxiety free.

I've got a pretty decent mentality in general. Self-diagnosis can have ruinous results in the long term, as I've observed so many times before.

 

[Sydian]

I was diagnosed with anxiety in 2011, though I'm sure it's been there all my life. I have always had nervous habits like biting my nails, rocking/swaying my body, tapping my feet, and twirling/flailing my hair around. Nervous conditions run on my mom's side of the family as well. I get really uncomfortable when I have to call people or answer phones (it took me a long time to start answering it at work), I would rather figure things out myself than ask for any help, I've held off doing very important things because of it (getting oil changed, talking to advisors, changing my debit card, etc), and back when I was diagnosed, it was so bad that having to talk to someone actually terrified me. I walked to class literally in fear that I would have to speak to someone, whether I knew them or not.

I've never had medicine for it and have just fought it alone pretty decently, but it can still get in the way. I had a panic attack today, so there's proof of that. lol To be fair though, that was only the second one I've had. The first was because of fireworks. I almost had one at a mall once. Had my sister not noticed I was starting to freak out, it definitely would have happened.

bleh.

 

[Universe]

I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety in 2012 (right up alongside PTSD), as I've had anxiety problems since childhood.
The PTSD developed fully within the last 4-5 ish years.

There aren't many notes of anxiety issues running in my family, but that might be because my family generally has issues seeing a doctor when they should. I've never noticed anyone around me having the same issues that I do, though. I pretty much refuse to speak to people on the phone. I hate answering the phone, I hate calling people even if they're my family member... uh, I have issues with real life conversation too. I avoid speaking to people, even if it's really important and I will have someone else do the speaking for me. (Namely, my roommate) There are so many things I still have to get done in my life at present and I just can't go through with them because I have to make a ton of phone calls as well as speak to doctors and psychologists about a lot of things. Do not want.

I will do everything possible to figure something out by myself so I don't have to ask for assistance, and when I do have to ask for help I feel like the biggest pain in the rear ever. I am also not a fan of being approached suddenly from behind, being touched without seeing the person before they do so, sudden loud noises... these things immediately get my heart going and cause me to get angry on the inside because it throws me into an inner panic.

I have had an uncountable amount of panic attacks throughout my life and I'm pretty subjected to them when something bad happens to me. I get thrown into a panic when I'm in emotional pain, mostly. The attacks can last for a while and cause me to hyperventilate like I'm suffocating.. and it really feels that way, too. :(

I've been on various medications for anxiety, but they always do way more harm than good.. so I've stopped bothering with all of them. The main problem I can't handle very well when I have issues with anxiety is being unable to sleep. (Such as right now XD;) If I have something important to do the next day, it will cause me to lose sooo much valuable sleep because I just can't fall asleep. Ah well.

Really though, I've learned to deal with most all of this fairly well I think. I don't show my anxiety except to those I'm close to and usually keep my feelings to myself.

 

[Warship]

ugh a few years back (like 1 or 2) i had a series of anxiety breakdowns and it was a pretty messed up experience :/ i've been diagnosed with it and saw one or two psychiatrists to get rid of it. i think i finally got rid of those breakdowns completely a few months ago but like every person i do feel anxiety just not on the level of disorder.

 

[tfr5015]

Social anxiety at one point. But you can change that. Every day I went out and did a challenge of some sort that whether it was asking for something crazy, doing something crazy, or even involving girls. The point is to force yourself out of your comfort zone so you see how much people don't actually give a ♥♥♥♥. You probably aren't doing things you'd love to do to do in your life because you fear failure, embarrassment, or pride. They mean nothing and they are irrational. What is the worst possible thing that will happen to you? Nothing? DING DING! You'll learn to laugh failure off. For example (of something I did), go to a department store and ask if they can work with you on the price of something (like an expensive bottle of perfume). When they ask what you were thinking, just say "free". Stay in character. Make something up. I promise you when you walk away probably not with a free bottle of perfume you will just laugh and feel free. That is only one thing I did. Finding these anxiety busters is probably as easy as a google search. Some call it a form of "rejection therapy", what I did was a bit different because they always didn't involve rejection. Just crazy antics to show that nothing would happen to me by doing them and it was freeing. I did it for 30 days straight and it was so hard. But at the end:
-I laugh off failure and don't let it dictate what I do
-I talk girls that I want instead of them going by (I stood in a drive through without a car the other day because I thought the girl was cute).
- I learned to be more comfortable with myself.
- I don't hesitate to try things I am uncertain of.
-My communication skills are better.
- My presence is better.

I hope some of you see this and consider it if anxiety messed with you the same way it did for me.

 

[Shining Raichu]

I've actually been looking into this for myself lately. Mine isn't the typical internet social anxiety thing; I work in retail so I'm quite happy to chat to strangers and function as a completely normal member of society.

But lately I have these spells where I feel really fearful for absolutely no reason and for the first hour when I wake up in the morning I feel this horrible sense of dread at the oncoming day, even though there's not really much in my typical day to dread. I dismissed it as morning grumpiness at first, but it feels a lot more extreme than that.

I think it stems from my job, because it only happens when I have to get up and go to work.

 

[Nihilego]

I've actually been looking into this for myself lately. Mine isn't the typical internet social anxiety thing; I work in retail so I'm quite happy to chat to strangers and function as a completely normal member of society.

But lately I have these spells where I feel really fearful for absolutely no reason and for the first hour when I wake up in the morning I feel this horrible sense of dread at the oncoming day, even though there's not really much in my typical day to dread. I dismissed it as morning grumpiness at first, but it feels a lot more extreme than that.

I think it stems from my job, because it only happens when I have to get up and go to work.

lmao @ the bolded

I actually sometimes get this too though, but mainly at night. Then again at night it's not unusual for people to feel a bit on-edge / down / whatever (...right??) so I kinda shrug it off as nothing usually. It's less dreading the oncoming day though and more feeling like at some stage something catastrophic is gonna happen. Weird.

 

[Bellsprout]

idk what it is/was as I've never been to a doctor. I started to notice something was wrong in my preteens. I was just always so overly nervous, shy, worried, etc when meeting new people, going out, doing social things. I was too scared to face my problem so I did nothing about it for a very long time. Not doing anything made it worse overtime until I was at the point where I was too nervous to hang out with my friends, leave the house, pick up the ♥♥♥♥ing phone.

Eventually I decided I didn't want to live like that anymore. I first started working out and lost a lot of weight which has helped a lot because before I was always so nervous that people would judge me right away or treat me badly because of how I looked. Then I just started going out slowly lol. I made my friends accompany me everywhere so I wouldn't be as anxious until I could go on my own. I hung out with my friends more, eventually became comfortable enough to go to social events with them, met their other friends, applied for jobs, worked with the public (which I loathe), flew by myself multiple times!!! Also actually looking at people in their eyes when they talk because for so long I would look at the floor or just not at them at all uhhh

It's been a three year process, but I feel pretty good now. My friends that have known me when I was extremely awkward always tell me how far I've come and how proud they are of me so that means a lot! For me I think the only way to overcome it was to face it which wasn't fun or easy at all, but I just had to do it. Even now there are times where I get nervous when invited to a big event and sometimes I face it and sometimes I know it's better to skip it because pushing myself too much sometimes results in setting me back.

It hasn't been an always fun journey, but I'm glad I went through it. I lead an independent life now and I have a lot more confidence which is a lot better than sitting in my house feeling bad about myself.

 

[Kano Shuuya]

I technically have quite a bit of anxiety, but these days I try to push myself outside of my comfort zones, and take a really "mind over matter" approach to things that I realize are freaking me out. I used to just let it rule my life, and it would stop me from doing things, because it was just a fight or flight thing.. "No, this scares me so I'm not gonna do it hahah". Nowadays it's more like "This only scares me because I let it, so screw that".

 

[Sirfetch’d]

I have it offline pretty bad and it does affect me quite a bit. I never want to really go out/meet anyone new because I never enjoy myself, I always want to leave right away, and I never have fun engaging in a conversation because I become so nervous. And this is something that has affected me most of my life which made going through high school really difficult. I guess I can say it has improved a bit since graduating and being in college but overall I still have small attacks every now and then.

 

[Belldandy]

Social anxiety, but with good reason (if you read my blog, you'll understand lol doesn't even cover some stuff, too).

I just got group work exemption from school and the privelege to get up and take breaks as required, just to detensify and slow down an anxiety attack. Large groups of people put me on edge. The mere word "group work" makes me shake, and if it exceeds a certain threshold I start having heart palpitations, hyperventilation, "clutched throat" and dizzy spells. I also sob uncontrollably and can't talk no matter how hard I try to. It's pretty sucky :\

I have issues feeling helpless or not in control of my own fate (such as marks in group work, or being trapped in a room). I have trust issues. I don't let people walk behind me, or look people in the eye outside; I just lower my head and move forward until I get somewhere where I can feel safe. I don't like to feel vulnerable, except with my boyfriend because I know he's not going to hurt me. I can't assume the same of anyone else (except my family, of course), though. I don't want to feel helpless ever again. It's not a nice feeling, especially when your life (or something of a lot of value, such as GPA) is on the line.

A lot of people also are discomforted by group work, but the difference is the reaction and irrationality of the fear.

 

[Auticorn]

I have very severe anxiety, mostly due to my autism. I can't even leave the house without freaking out. I also can't be alone with others because it's that bad. D: It's affected my ability to hold down a job and attend college because I can't seem to handle stress very well at all. However, it doesn't affect my friendships or my romantic relationship with my boyfriend. It also affects my ability to talk on the phone as well. I freak out every time I have to speak to someone wants to talk to me on the phone. I don't even know why though, but it just happens. I could literally go one forever about this...

I spend most of my time being in my room in front of a computer screen. This is usually my life because my anxiety can be really crippling for me at times. Before I started taking abilify, my anxiety used to be so intense that I would literally try to harm myself. I just wanted to die because I felt so stressed out for no apparent reason. Everything I normally tried to do, I couldn't because it held me back. I have it somewhat under control, but there are still moments when it comes up, and I meltdown over something. D:

 

[Sammi]

I don't have anxiety.

It's true that I can get paranoid about stuff stuff sometimes (maybe a lot), but it doesn't affect my daily life. I hold down a job, I pay my bills, I can be social, I'm a functioning adult. I don't think I've ever had a legit panic attack, and if I have, it's been years. I may put off stuff for ages because I'm nervous at times, but in the end, it'll eventually get done.

Pretty confident I'm just a normal adult with normal issues.

 

[Dreg]

I am anxious almost all of the time... OCD-wise, who I speak to, what will happen in the future... unable to control it. It affects my life daily because I'm unable to do a lot of things socially without being too anxious.

 

[Corvus of the Black Night]

I have a lot of trouble controlling internal emotions and anxiety is probably the number one offender. I basically just frak the ♥♥♥♥ out internally randomly when I'm stressed. It's the worst thing ever.

 

[Neil Peart]

My anxiety manifests itself mainly in the health area. My health anxiety is so bad that I endured an unnecessary surgery on my neck for something that wasn't there end ended up leaving the bottom half of my lip unable to move. I ended up getting a nasty staph infection and hospitalized for a week, having a hole cut into my neck to drain the infection. All for nothing, all because I thought I had lymphoma and there was scant evidence to support the claim.

It makes me wonder how far I'll want to go for the next imagined disease.

 

[Corvus of the Black Night]

My anxiety manifests itself mainly in the health area. My health anxiety is so bad that I endured an unnecessary surgery on my neck for something that wasn't there end ended up leaving the bottom half of my lip unable to move. I ended up getting a nasty staph infection and hospitalized for a week, having a hole cut into my neck to drain the infection. All for nothing, all because I thought I had lymphoma and there was scant evidence to support the claim.

It makes me wonder how far I'll want to go for the next imagined disease.

Ouch, that sounds incredibly expensive, too.

I get like that but I'm so afraid of the costs that I brush off going to the doctor. My anxiety and inability to concentrate at work though is making that a really tough call. I think I need to see a psych.

 

[Fairy]

My anxiety manifests itself mainly in the health area. My health anxiety is so bad that I endured an unnecessary surgery on my neck for something that wasn't there end ended up leaving the bottom half of my lip unable to move. I ended up getting a nasty staph infection and hospitalized for a week, having a hole cut into my neck to drain the infection. All for nothing, all because I thought I had lymphoma and there was scant evidence to support the claim.

It makes me wonder how far I'll want to go for the next imagined disease.

You're one of the only people I know whose anxiety manifests like this. The other person being myself, of course. I sympathize with your grief. :(

I was diagnosed with severe anxiety 2013, but I've struggled with it for much longer than that. I've really been fighting a battle trying to manage these intense fears since my mother passed. She was 51, and no one expected it. It was sudden cardiac arrest, brought on by alcohol withdrawal and years of bodily abuse, and since then I've been in a steady state of constant nervousness; convinced I'm going to suffer the same fate. Like Axton, I mostly find my anxiety hits its stride at night when I'm trying to sleep (of course), and I'll start getting those aggressive, recurrent, intrusive thoughts brought on by the stupidest of things. Like being able to hear my heartbeat when my head is against a pillow, for instance. And I'll end up in a full blown panic because I end up working myself into quite a lather just trying to redirect all of those feelings.

I'm so terrified of my own body and what could be inside of it; illness and disease lurking in my genome or my environment waiting to strike me dead without a moments notice. Steady, irrational fears of the unknown, dying, and not being in control..

All that said, I'd like to think I've made extraordinary progress in the past couple of months! I'm working towards recovery, and faithfully doing everything my doctor says, from medication to therapy, no matter how expensive (it's like an investment in myself, you know?). And I'm really feeling the anxiety taking a backseat to more appropriate, rational emotions that don't keep me awake at night or force me to stay home during fun outings.

I'm feeling normal, and it's pretty awesome. :)