Bisexuality

[Imafroggy]

So I was at work a couple days ago and I was talking to one of my coworkers about my dog and she brought up her girlfriend in a conversation. One of my coworkers (who is gay) joined in and when she left he asked me if I believed that people can actually be bisexual:3c. I, of course said yes. You're able to like men and women and have a preference for either.

So this begs the question :), rather than ask if you believe whether or not someone can truly be bisexual, I want to ask why people regardless of orientation think this about bisexual people. Why do people find it so hard to believe that a person can find both a man and woman attractive? >_>

 

[gimmepie]

Because some people are narrow-minded and foolish and find it hard to accept and understand anything that differs from them.

 

[Corrin]

Unfortunately for my bi self, my step father is the same way, he doesn't believe in bisexuality and just tells me to "choose one".
It's very narrow minded and a harmful view to have as it invalidates the struggles that bisexuals go through.

 

[Nihilego]

While I agree that it's narrow-minded to outright deny that bisexuality can exist, I think I can come up with a reason why it's a concept that some people struggle with.

If you see a man with another man, you usually assume that he's gay. If you see a man with a woman, you usually assume he's straight. This is true for anyone who doesn't invest a lot of effort into thinking about sexuality (i.e. most of the population). And when you've made that assumption, you're not going to go asking people if they're bisexual or not; you just take what you see at face value. I mean, I bet that every one of the other posters in this thread has assumed (and probably routinely assumes) that if a man is with a woman then that is a straight man and a straight woman. And because these assumptions are made, most people probably feel like they don't know any bisexuals - thus, they find it extraordinarily exceptional when they do meet one and probably find it a little difficult to process. In reality they probably know more than they thought and just never actually asked to find out.

So I think that the difficulty comes from people not realising that they actually likely know some bisexuals, and instead think of bisexuality as some really abstract and unusual concept. After all, as I say, unless you either ask or watch a person go through multiple relationships with people of different genders, a bisexual person is indistinguishable from a straight or a gay person. I guess it's just an admittedly unusual concept for a lot of people and one that maybe they need to see with their own eyes in their own lives to believe.

Because some people are narrow-minded and foolish and find it hard to accept and understand anything that differs from them.

Do you think that such a staunchly judgemental view of anybody who struggles with the concept of bisexuality is going to help foster greater acceptance?

 

[gimmepie]

Do you think that such a staunchly judgmental view of anybody who struggles with the concept of bisexuality is going to help foster greater acceptance?

I think education is probably more effective than being outright judgmental quite frankly, but I think that there comes a point - say the 21st Century - where we as a society should probably have worked some things out.

Bisexuality is well documented, it's a thing. There are very clearly people attracted to both sexes. Denying that is like denying climate change. It might not be immediate if a person is bisexual but that's true of all sexuality so it's not an excuse.

 

[Lipstick Vogue]

Because some people are narrow-minded and foolish and find it hard to accept and understand anything that differs from them.

You've been on fire recently, woke af.

 

[Somewhere_]

I think a lot of people are confused about sexuality and gender because it gets VERY confusing, which just adds another barrier to accepting certain sexualities and genders.

 

[gimmepie]

I think a lot of people are confused about sexuality and gender because it gets VERY confusing, which just adds another barrier to accepting certain sexualities and genders.

Gender I'd give you.
Sexuality really isn't that confusing at all. It is quite simply the kind of person you would prefer to have sex with, if anyone. Nothing confusing there.

 

[Somewhere_]

Gender I'd give you.
Sexuality really isn't that confusing at all. It is quite simply the kind of person you would prefer to have sex with, if anyone. Nothing confusing there.

Personally, I dont think sexuality is confusing. But I do think its confusing to many adults. gay/straight/bisexual isn't too confusing. Sexualities like pansexual and omnisexual are more confusing, and when you combine all of these sexualities with gender, it gets super confusing.

 

[pastelspectre]

i do think bisexuality is a thing. i did think i was bi, for a really long time, until i realized that there were more than two genders and discovered pansexuality. however since a LOT of people don't believe in pansexuality, and i don't want to be made fun of or be called a "special snowflake", i just say im non labeling for sexuality. however my nana thinks bisexuality isn't real, she thinks you can only like one or the other sadly. but it's whatever. my nana has been like this ever since i was in middle school, and im graduated from high school now so obvs her views on this wont change anytime soon.

 

[gimmepie]

Personally, I dont think sexuality is confusing. But I do think its confusing to many adults. gay/straight/bisexual isn't too confusing. Sexualities like pansexual and omnisexual are more confusing, and when you combine all of these sexualities with gender, it gets super confusing.

It's... really not. It's as simple as "I am attracted to these people" (or not).

 

[Hands]

I think the better question is to ask if anyone is truly straight or gay. I think there's a level of bisexuality in everyone who identifies as anything outside of asexual. You might have a massive preference to one gender over another, but I've never met anyone who could honestly say they've never had a sexually charged thought about a gender outside of their preference.

 

[Somewhere_]

It's... really not. It's as simple as "I am attracted to these people" (or not).

I personally dont find it confusing, but more traditional adults do find it confusing. Its way too far outside their narrative and bubble.

 

[Majestic Electric]

I think it's because most people who identify as bisexual are young. During adolescence, the individual is learning to becoming independent and are beginning to discover who they are as people, so some people see bisexuality as someone experimenting with their sexual orientation.

 

[pastelspectre]

I think it's because most people who identify as bisexual are young. During adolescence, the individual is learning to becoming independent and are beginning to discover who they are as people, so some people see bisexuality as someone experimenting with their sexual orientation.

then the proper term for those adolescents would be bicurious, if they were experimenting and discovering who they are. but labeling themselves as bisexual is valid as well. i understand that people are just trying to figure out who they are and what they're interested in, stuff like that.

 

[gimmepie]

I personally dont find it confusing, but more traditional adults do find it confusing. Its way too far outside their narrative and bubble.

That doesn't make it a difficult or confusing concept to understand, it means people aren't trying hard enough to keep up with the world/get out of their narrative bubble.

 

[Lipstick Vogue]

Or they're just getting on with their lives.

 

[Oddball_]

I think it's because most people who identify as bisexual are young. During adolescence, the individual is learning to becoming independent and are beginning to discover who they are as people, so some people see bisexuality as someone experimenting with their sexual orientation.

This is partially true. However as recent years have shown us, people are coming out in droves. The 1/5 odds of not being straight have quickly become around 1/3. (These numbers are from a study done at my college.)
Honestly I don't think *people* have changed, only become more accepting which does lead to some curiosity and as such they will aptly learn if they're gay straight or bi.

As for why people don't believe bisexuality is a thing... They can't comprehend it. They don't feel this way, and how dare people be different! Its an ignorant and bullshit viewpoint for the simple minded who refuse to see facts. Yes this is harsh, but its facts. That and I'm not trying to convince anyone. They'll either accept the facts or die ignorant. They'll try and do foolish things, but we'll keep them from pulling them off as we've been doing. Its like arguing with children, there's just no point in it.

 

[Somewhere_]

That doesn't make it a difficult or confusing concept to understand, it means people aren't trying hard enough to keep up with the world/get out of their narrative bubble.

6 one way, half a dozen the other. Regardless, they are not understanding and that is problematic because the over 50's voting group are taking up a greater percentage of voters as time goes on.

 

[Sir Codin]

I'm probably going to mirror a lot of people responding already when I say that sexuality exists on a spectrum where the extremes are "exclusively prefers opposite sex" and on the other side "exclusively prefers same sex" and say that most people occupy the far sides of either extreme, but there are many people who fall into the more 'gray area' of the spectrum. It's legit to do so and I don't see why people can't seem to understand why it's not so.