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beat up other girls with magic balls and shapes that are colorful. and also suffer from their magic stuff. (Touhou)
its your fault they wanna freaking kill you. (Touhou 14.3 SEIJA'S GAME)
collect cheese and your boss kill you (Transformice)
Gotta go fast! (Sonic the Hedgehog)
It's no use! (Sonic the Hedgehog 2006)
Kill racists/extremists while your head hurts from confusion (Bioshock Infinite)
Shoot people, get guns (Borderlands)
Handsome Jack is an ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ (Borderlands 2)
Oops, you started the end of the world while looking for treasure (Megaman Legends)
Don't starve (Don't Starve)
You kill turtles and eat mushrooms (Super Mario Bros.)
You're a bear with a bird in his backpack and you collects puzzle pieces (Banjo-Kazooie)
You're a rich duck on a pogo stick (DuckTales)
You're a little blue man with a gun for a hand (Mega Man)
You're a pie chart trying to eat popcorn while being chased by ghosts (Pac-Man)
You race upside-down with lizards (Mario Kart 8)
You clean up a mess (Super Mario Sunshine)
You're alone, but you shoot at things until you leave (Metroid)
Let's see if I can come up with anything decent.....
-That's another Photon Drop, not that Spread Needle you've spent days looking for. (Phantasy Star Online)
-Beat up kids, steal their money, and save the world from criminal organizations while the police do nothing, then consider taking over the world because you're the very best, like no one ever was. (Pokemon series)
-I'm supposed to save the world from dragons, but ♥♥♥♥ that, I'm gonna do all these other things instead. (Skyrim)
-Your stats are at 100 million? Grind some more, ♥♥♥♥♥, that's not enough. And Prinnes, dood. (Disgaea series)
-Apparently someone thought it was a good idea to try and save the world by sticking the Master of Death inside a teenager without their consent. Demon Path is awesome, btw. (Soul Nomad and the World Eaters)
And then there's this one for Tales of Symphonia that I saw once on the internet that I thought was great. It went something like:
"A group of men and women ages 12 to 4000 become physically and emotionally dependent on a 17 year old boy who can't even do his multiplication tables."
lol
You team up with three children that just so happen to be commanding officers and fight in a happy war that's just for fun except soldiers really are dying because of you - Advance Wars
-Knocking people out in alleys is now a popular sport (street fighter)
-You're a fluffy cannibal looking for cake (Kirby)
-A kingdom has asked a plumber to save a princess by eating mushrooms (super Mario)
-Ultimate death match made up entirely of wind-up toys (Pokémon rumble)
-Kids have enslaved monsters, and you play as a kid who has also enslaved a monster and is trying to stop the other kids (monster tale)
-Snappily-dressed gorilla kills lizards to reclaim bananas (donkey kong country)
-Pick your nose and then cook some stir fry and then jump rope and then hula hoop and then guide people to the bathroom (wario ware smooth moves)
I hope to add more. That was fun.
Try to build a city and then fail because the game was broken on release, then go out and download a bunch of mods and cheat codes to build your perfect city in between frequent crashes to desktop, since the game is still broken, and fail at that perfect city anyway, since you didn't download the right mods, and proceed to go out and download some more mods. Repeat cycle until game takes 20 minutes to load all the mods you have installed at startup. (Sim City 4)
Be a Stat Geek who no one else understands. (Out of the Park Baseball, any iteration)
Make movies and go bankrupt because you can't keep your movies under budget nor the egos of your stars in check. (The Movies)
Play virtual dolls while trying to keep themselves from setting themselves on fire while cooking, ultimately failing every time they try to cook because you didn't learn your lesson and sell the stove after the first 20 times your virtual dolls killed themselves trying to cook. That instinct they have to run toward a fire doesn't help matters, either. (The Sims, any iteration)
Kill virtual dolls in the cruelest ways possible because you can. (The Sims, any iteration)
omg, that's beautiful. This takes the pie cake for this thread.
Travel 7 years into the future to save the world in the past from something that only happened because you traveled 7 years into the future. (Ocarina of Time)
It's like the B-movie version of Dead Space if Isaac were a psychologist with a suspected drinking problem. And also insane. (Afterfall: Insanity)
Flip the table and break $50 in tea cups when you "lose" because you added one too many milk-balls to your tea. (Ampu-Tea)
It's Farmville with zombies that eat your produce. Because everything's better with zombies/pirates. (Farm For Your Life)
And since quoting is kosher, the defining moments for this game: "What is it? What is it? What.. is... this?" (The original Resident Evil)
-Vegetables become weaponized and your neighbour is a crazy man who sells you more vegetables out of the back of his car (plants vs zombies)
-just keep pressing the a button (rhythm heaven fever)
-you're an astronaut who goes to a planet where pretty much every species of life form is trying to kill you, so you enslave the one species that isn't (how I actually described pikmin to someone)
-for some reason, the more houses you have, the longer it takes to build one (any of those real-time apps like tapped out)
-it's a music game, but apparently there's some sort of really in-depth plot about robots and the apocalypse (the app cytus)
The following is a ghost trick one, but contains spoilers...
Spoiler:
You're a dead cat, and it takes you the entire night to figure out that you're a dead cat. also lots of dancing and chicken. and then you go back in time really far and change stuff so technically the entire night never happened.
Someone needs to make a version of this thread for movies... :D
- You're a person trying to carve a name for yourself in a post nuclear-apocalyptic world; takes place in Nevada. (Fallout New Vegas)
- You're a futuristic space marine fighting Hell's army in order to save Earth. Problem is, you're all alone! (Doom 2)
- It's big stompy robot action with lazorz, missiles, & BIG guns!! (MechWarrior series)
Touch the bottom screen. A lot. (Feel the Magic XY/XX)
Make games where people touch the bottom screen. A lot. (WarioWare DIY)
Run around with no weapons where everything wants to eat you. (Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee)
Blow people up with your farts. (Oddworld: Abe's Exodus)
Buy a can of smelly fish eggs. (Oddworld: Munch's Oddysee)
Centaur shoots wild animals at wanted criminals/egotistical CEOs. (Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath)
lots of glitches and good textures (Pokemon Naranja
youre a pink ball with a fairy and you have a human friend and a penguin friend and a enemie friend PLUS you are being corrupted by a blog! ( Kirby 64 Crystal Shards)