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The BEST Pokémon

I think that Togepi would be a good choice. As mentioned in it's Ruby/Sapphire entry:

As its energy, TOGEPI uses the positive emotions of compassion and pleasure exuded by people and POKéMON. This POKéMON stores up feelings of happiness inside its shell, then shares them with others.

Now Which Pokemon would be the best for competing with you in a three legged race? (i.e. the pokemon whose leg will be tied to yours)?
 
Azurill! We wouldn't even need our legs, it could just hop along! A loophole's a loophole!

Worst Pokémon to take to work/school?
 
Wailord, worst pet for show and tell ever...

Best Pokemon to ballroom dance with?
 
I think Gardevoir.
Worst pokemon that is taller then the pokemon X and Y protagonists.

Zygarde, but let me explain. I feel like it has no purpose in XY. It's just a random legendary that you can catch that serves no real purpose in the plot, kind of like Mewtwo in RBY, Suicune in GS, Rayquaza in RS, Giratina in DP, and Kyurem in BW. Have I named enough? Let's just hope that the 6th Gen sequels give Zygarde a use. Also, I don't think that the XY protagonists are 16 feet tall.

Alright, best Pokemon to play FPS games like Call of Duty with/against?
 
Zygarde will get a use, they've been doing this since Rayquaza and with Giratina and Kyurem.

Any uhh... none but if you are so insitent Gastly so it can kill me for playing CoD.

Best Pokemon to Tattoo
 
erm... Wailord? So much room to draw on...

Best Pokemon to brainwash everyone so you're the all-powerful overlord?
 
I wanna Say Machamp but that will just break your arms...

... so Charmeleon because it isn't to bulky but also not to weak...

The Best Pokemon to use as a Kite?
 
I wanna Say Machamp but that will just break your arms...

... so Charmeleon because it isn't to bulky but also not to weak...

The Best Pokemon to use as a Kite?

Ditto, he can become ANYTHING.

The best pokemon to give your children "The talk"?
 
A Pdgeot and a Beedrill. Who better to give "The Talk" than a Bird and a Bee?

Best Pokemon to take as your wingman on a night out?
 
Liepard, because it can give me Assurance that everything will work out fine.

Best pokemon to give you open-heart surgery?

Scyther. Snip-snip i say...snip-snip.

Best pokemon to pierce your ear\nose\eyebrow etc.?
 
Scyther. Snip-snip i say...snip-snip.

Best pokemon to pierce your ear\nose\eyebrow etc.?
Ditto, because he could just turn himself into the piercing and piercing tool thingy, and insert itself in your ear / nose / eyebrow/ ....other parts.....

Best Pokemon to take cover behind while it is sleeping?
 
Snorlax. Have you seen that thing's gut? Although, there is the problem of it possibly rolling over and squishing you.

Best Pokemon to cheat on a test with?
 
Haunter, because it cant become transparent AND it has arms to right down the answers.

Best pokemon to have as a security system?
 
Rotom, it can essentially BECOME the security cameras, and attack any thieves? I guess.

Best Pokemon to go to after a...break-up..?
 
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