The Post Your Problems Thread

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Livewire

Livewire

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    Post Your Problems 3.0


    The former thread was getting rather large and old, so time for a fresh start.


    • Adhere to the standard OC rules.

    • Same as before. Post your problems, but avoid unnecessary drama.

    • This thread is designed to genuinely help people. If you have nothing constructive to add, do not post here. As simple as that. Respect others and their viewpoints. Perpetual trolling/flaming will result in disciplinary action.

    • Don't post trivial problems, like "I forgot my phone at home" or something to that effect. Post here because you have a legitimate problem that can generally be solved.

    These are subject to change, depends how the thread turns out. Any questions, don't hesitate to contact either myself or a member of Higher Staff. That being said, post your problems. b"b
     
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    Hmm... this is something that I've always just ignored, but it really is annoying... my parents have the worst image of me in their heads, while I'm like a freaking saint or something. (Epic exaggeration is epic.) But yeah, I always do my best to be a good person, and I think I do a pretty good job of it.

    Still, they have this really negative view of me. Any ideas on how to change that? I don't want to just come out and say what I'm thinking, and there's literally no way to demonstrate it through my actions, since I'm already doing everything right afaik.

    (Yay 1st post!)
     
    QuilavaKing said:
    CHANCE! I better come up with a problem quick. (Yay 1st post!)

    Hmm... this is something that I've always just ignored, but it really is annoying... my parents have the worst image of me in their heads, while I'm like a freaking saint or something. (Epic exaggeration is epic.) But yeah, I always do my best to be a good person, and I think I do a pretty good job of it.

    Still, they have this really negative view of me. Any ideas on how to change that? I don't want to just come out and say what I'm thinking, and there's literally no way to demonstrate it through my actions, since I'm already doing everything right afaik.
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    Well, If they have such a negative view, maybe ask why? Or go to them and ask them what they're looking for, so you know exactly what you need to do to patch up their opinion of you. This might sound kinda lame, but sit down for awhile and talk it out.
     
    QuilavaKing said:
    Hmm... this is something that I've always just ignored, but it really is annoying... my parents have the worst image of me in their heads, while I'm like a freaking saint or something. (Epic exaggeration is epic.) But yeah, I always do my best to be a good person, and I think I do a pretty good job of it.

    Still, they have this really negative view of me. Any ideas on how to change that? I don't want to just come out and say what I'm thinking, and there's literally no way to demonstrate it through my actions, since I'm already doing everything right afaik.

    (Yay 1st post!)
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    I think Live Wire's advice is good as indeed you should talk to your parents over what they expect of you. However, in the end, don't be so hard on yourself if they still have a negative view of you. Parents tend to have very high expectations of their children and it's not easy changing their views of you. It's annoying, yes, but in the end it's you that knows yourself more than your parents.
     
    Bay Alexison said:
    I think Live Wire's advice is good as indeed you should talk to your parents over what they expect of you. However, in the end, don't be so hard on yourself if they still have a negative view of you. Parents tend to have very high expectations of their children and it's not easy changing their views of you. It's annoying, yes, but in the end it's you that knows yourself more than your parents.
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    That's true, it's sort of their job to have lofty expectations, but you should be proud of that. It means that they think your capable of great things. ^^
     
    I'm not feeling so well.

    Lately...

    Spoiler:
     
    Headfirst For Halos said:
    I'm not feeling so well.

    Lately...

    Spoiler:
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    Self-harm is definitely not the way to go. You're going to make things worse for yourself. For me, the best solution is to tell some form of authority your problem and what you/they can do to fix it.

    I experienced something similar to you, and was originally keeping it a secret at first, but I eventually gave in and told my teachers and parents about it. Trust me, once you've talked to a few people about your problem, it gets easier telling other people about it.
     
    Well, erm, here I go.
    Spoiler:
     
    jolene, i don't suppose you are married so i wouldn't worry about it. heck, i don't suppose your relationship is all that serious so i really wouldn't even entertain the thought. n_n

    but if you want to be courteous (read: slightly over invasive) you can always get them something cheap from a dollar store. or even just a holiday card for the whole family. personally i wouldn't though, i bet they aren't even going to get you anything lol. you'll just make them feel awkward because they don't have anything for you. if they do however, keep that card in your back pocket and if they give you something worth more than a dollar, act as if you don't appreciate it and you're mad because you only got them a card. then it will be their fault and not yours.
     
    InfernoRogue said:
    Well, erm, here I go.
    Spoiler:
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    I see where you are coming from here. I'm not too good at giving advice but I'll try. Ok, do you feel that your life is too dull? From what you're saying, it looks like it might need something new in your life, to 'spice it up' if you like. This could be in a certain hobby that you enjoy, (eg. I use that through art, by just doodling or something like that, because I'm terrible at art, and don't have the skills to be a natural.) or it could be a person, that you may have feelings for. Or, it could be that you just need a holiday! Please don't take that seriously.

    And when you are doing your tests, don't think about letting anyone down, or letting yourself down; just do the best you can. By the looks of it, you have, which is awesome. Just remember: these are YOUR grades, your marks, no one needs to tell you that you didn't do well in your test because *goes into cliche mode* you tried your best. And because you tried your best, you can then not feel the way you do, because you know that you have gone to your full potential.

    Hope this helps!

    <3
     
    Stratos99 said:
    jolene, i don't suppose you are married so i wouldn't worry about it. heck, i don't suppose your relationship is all that serious so i really wouldn't even entertain the thought. n_n

    but if you want to be courteous (read: slightly over invasive) you can always get them something cheap from a dollar store. or even just a holiday card for the whole family. personally i wouldn't though, i bet they aren't even going to get you anything lol. you'll just make them feel awkward because they don't have anything for you. if they do however, keep that card in your back pocket and if they give you something worth more than a dollar, act as if you don't appreciate it and you're mad because you only got them a card. then it will be their fault and not yours.
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    Yea I decided I am just going to get them an Audrey Hepburn calendar.


    InfernoRogue said:
    Well, erm, here I go.
    Spoiler:
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    You should get some colorful drapes. That way when you wake up and the sun shines through your drapes it will project colorful colors onto your wall and you will start the day in good cheer.
     
    Jolene said:
    Do you have to buy presents for your boyfriend's family? I don't really want to but I go to their house a lot so maybe I should?
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    instead of the calender, maybe you should do something simple but personal like a poem or perform a song with a musical instrument. that'd be p. cool.
     
    Meh I'm feeling really bad about the past.... and only friends I made here are 2 people, >< , and I try to be happy and everything but things get in the way, I join sports and clubs but I feel I'm never great, I went real depressed to the point where I want to hurt myself I actually did, I'm scared and I don't know what I can do.. my parents don't appreciate my talent, nor that they care I'm learning another langusge, they only want what's "best", but that path will eventually make me hurt myself, I don't want to become a doctor or anything, but they don't understand me, sorry hahahah this is just too depressing but they don't really even let me see the psychiatrist anymore,


    yikes I read some of the posts, it looks like it's the same problem. heheheh, darn I also need help on a hack but I am still having a hard time trying, I'm not very mathematical :(
     
    tehGDS said:
    Meh I'm feeling really bad about the past.... and only friends I made here are 2 people, >< , and I try to be happy and everything but things get in the way, I join sports and clubs but I feel I'm never great, I went real depressed to the point where I want to hurt myself I actually did, I'm scared and I don't know what I can do.. my parents don't appreciate my talent, nor that they care I'm learning another langusge, they only want what's "best", but that path will eventually make me hurt myself, I don't want to become a doctor or anything, but they don't understand me, sorry hahahah this is just too depressing but they don't really even let me see the psychiatrist anymore,


    yikes I read some of the posts, it looks like it's the same problem. heheheh, darn I also need help on a hack but I am still having a hard time trying, I'm not very mathematical :(
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    I'd say sit down and try to talk to your parents about what you're feeling. Maybe all they know is that you don't want to be a doctor.. but don't know WHY you feel that way. If you could explain to them how you're feeling and that you need help, perhaps you can come up with a compromise.
    Self hurt is never a good idea, and I know that school councilors or school psychologists are always free. Perhaps you can ask the front office to speak to one. (Don't ask to speak to a guidance councilor because they don't know anything about psychiatric problems) but try to speak to the school therapist.

    You need to let your problems out on someone who can physically help you with it. As much as venting on PC will help you feel better, it wont solve the root of the problem and wont help to get communication with your parents back on track.

    I hope this advice doesn't sound negative, but I think that no one here can really offer insight into psychological disorders such as depression. You need to continue talking to a trained professional, and perhaps try and talk to someone who can help you get through to your parents and be able to communicate effectively to them to solve all the feelings that you seem to be going through.
    Good luck and let us know how it goes. <3 I'm rooting for you!
     
    The best advice I have for you few people above with similar sorts of problems is that you need to be who YOU are, not how anyone else wants you to be.
    If you worry too much about what others want you to be, or want from/for you then you will never be happy.
    You need to stand up and say this is who I am, this is what I want.

    Parents and teachers will always want what they think is best for you, that might not always be what you want though. They need to understand that.
    Communication is key. If you never stand up and say something then nothing will ever change.

    One thing I don't understand is how self harm would fix anything or make anything better, how is that a solution to any problem? People who do that or even contemplate it do need some sort of psychological diagnosis.
    [I'm allowed to say that because I'm on half a dozen different pills for my own personal mental health]
     
    What do you do if you more than like somebody, but they might be confused about they're sexuality? : S
     
    Jubilation said:
    What do you do if you more than like somebody, but they might be confused about they're sexuality? : S
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    Ask this person if they like somebody that you both may know personally. Try to start up a topic with them about relationships, but don't do it in such a way where they'll feel uncomfortable with you. If they don't want to really press the issue, don't go forward with it. But if you listen intently to the person, you might be able to get a sense about their sexuality.
     
    Jubilation said:
    What do you do if you more than like somebody, but they might be confused about they're sexuality? : S
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    .. ._. Ask them out? lol.. or tell them how you feel? Unless you feel like you'd be ruining your friendship.. but you didn't mention that they were friends..
     
    Kura said:
    .. ._. Ask them out? lol.. or tell them how you feel? Unless you feel like you'd be ruining your friendship.. but you didn't mention that they were friends..
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    I have told him how I feel, but the thing is, he never said anything, like at all and that's what makes me curious...
     
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