Things a Pokémon anime character never say

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Ash:*panting heavily*Look Professor,I caught the 151 of Kanto...
Oak:Great, but 100 new pokemon were just ddiscovered in Johto,Go catch those.
Ash:WTF?!*Runs off*
Oak:Now, time to go visit Ms.Ketchum fufufufu...

A few years later.
Ash:I caught the Johto Pokemon now!Took a while ,but now...
Oak:My friend from Hoenn said their Pokemon aren't like the ones here,go check them out hehehehe....
Ash >_> you old ass son of a....
*Ash Runs off again*
Oak:Say Misty, how about you stay here for a while?
Misty:That sounds nice Professor BD

*Few MORE years later*
Ash:Me....and Brock....Are Back....From Sinnoh....
Oak(with Misty, May, and Ash's Mother):Ash , I heard about some Pokemon In this Place called Unova, its far away but its very awesome.

Ash:THese guys are trying to get rid of me....<_<
*Ash Walks off*
Ash:You coming Brock?
Brock:Nahh, I think I'll go visit Pewter in a while.

Ash:<_< Not you too....

Brock:Now then....STOP HOLDING OUT ON ME HUGH HEFNER!
 
Ash: The next gym leader is Fantina! Now to use Normal type attacks on her Pokèmon!
Brock: I heard she has the habit of speaking Russian.
Fantina: Ich spreche Deutsch (I speak German!)
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Elesa (Kamitsure): Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Chilli ♥(Pod)
Chilli: Byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyye Elesa....
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Dawn: AAH! I AM REPLACED BY IRIS!
May: NOOOO, POKèMON CONTESTS ARE DISAPPEARING!
Misty: AAAAAAAA! CAN'T FIND GARY (I'm an Egoshipper, Gary x Misty)
Paul: AAAAAAAAA, You're all pathetic.
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Brock: (to Temacu) Of course I'll marry you!

Ash: Screw gyms! I'm doing contests now!

Brock: Cooking is so fun, cooking is so fun, now it's time to take a break and see what we have done. (whoever gets the reference wins a cookie)
 
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DAWN, MAY, MISTY, and IRIS are locked in a room together.

MISTY: I bet Ash likes me best. He traveled with me first, and to fill the empty hole when I left, he tried to get you guys. But on the inside, I bet he loves me.
MAY: You son of a--Ash and I have been through heck of an adventure. Heck, Manaphy was my babeh!! Ash likes me best, we saw Deoxys together and Jirachi...that long time, he must still have some feelings of me.
DAWN: You are all idiots. Ash obviously likes me best. You can't say no to a chick with blue hair.
IRIS: *pulls out her gun* Listen, bubs, I'm not letting you try to take the spotlight again. Ash is mine...NO MORE COMPETITION!
MAY, DAWN, and MISTY: AAAHH!!!!!
*Ash opens door to locked room*
ASH: Hey guys, what'd I miss? Iris, what's that strange thing you're holding? And how come all your shirts have my face on them?
IRIS: Uh...
MISTY: Well...
MAY: Er...
DAWN: Awkward...
PIKACHU: I like ducks.
 
Ash: Yu-Gi_oh is better than Pokemon

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Brock: I like rock hard stuff. I also like to breed.

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James: Why are we still stalking that Ash kid?
Jesse: Durrrrrr
Meowth: 'cos we got no lives.
 
Grimer: My beautiful pitstink, it's gone! The things are off now. It's booger time! (He throws snots at Servine)
Servine: Aaaaaahhh!!! Boogers!!! Aaaahhh!!! (Runs to the the building, with Grime behind him) Run, Ho-oh! Grimer is digging for gold! (They run into the room)
Ho-oh: Gold? Heehee! (runs to find the gold, but comes out with nothing.)
Watchog: Did you get any of Grimer's "gold"?
Ho-oh: He's not digging for any gold I'm looking for.

Sewaddle: (Darmanitan's cold form lands behind him) GOOD GRIEF, HE'S NAKED!!

Axew: Oh, goody, a holographic bowl of spinach again!

Mew: We stand on one foot. (He does) Balance a glass of chocolate milk on our heads and sing the Unova National Anthem. (He does)
Mew and Victini: (singing) Oh, Unova, we pledge our hearts to you, As faithful, as deep, as true, as blue, Unova, we love you!

Manaphy and Pichu: (singing) Pork chops, pork chops, it's delicious underneath! Pork jowls, pork jowls, great barrier reef! (They clap)

Galvantula: You can't do this to me! If you think I'm going to stand out there all day listening to... (cuts to Joltik, who splits himself in two.)
Joltik: Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah...
 
Ash: Forget this! I'm just going to use a gun!

James: You know? I've been thinking. Why don't we just focus our attacks on the pokemon trainer instead of fighting their pokemon?
Jesse: HEATHEN! *slaps*

Pikachu: I am not in this episode. The one you see here is made of cardboard because we were idiots with our budget.
 
Misty: Back you hungry Lugia, back!


Rhydon: Is this how you get your sick kicks (Rhydon shows Snivy a burger)

Snivy: What? Its just an ordinary burger...(scene zooms in to show the burger made with gross-out items) Oh my goodness! Jolteon!


Ash: *Gibberish* -Prof. Oak's wallet!


Mew: Mewtwo, are you okay? I heard a... wow! (Flies over to a pie on the table and points his finger to it) A pie!


Zapdos: Axew, what's the meaning of all these garbage? Great Stinkin' Elec Man!
 
Ash: Wait guys! I'm still playing Pokemon Fire Red... YES!!!!! Oh wait, I lost... :(
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Brock: I have a DATE TONGHT!!!!
---
Misty: I'm really Little Mermaid.... In Pokemon form.....
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May: QUIEEEEEETT!!!!! I'm playing Pokemon Emerald ya know!!!!!
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Dawn: I hate my hat!!!!
---
Iris: I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH, I WHIP MY HAIR BACK AND FORTH...
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Cilan: I wish my brothers were here to tell Ash to STOP PLAYING POKEMON BLACK AND WHITE!!!!
 
Ash: Forget Pokéballs! I'll use Yu-Gi-Oh cards instead!

*Mew pops up out of nowhere*
Misty: AAAAAHH! GET AWAY!

*A lot of Light and Wily's Robot Masters appears*
Cilan: Go, Pokéballs!

Gravity Man: Run for yor life, Lugia! The Roboenza is stricken us like silver!
Lugia: Silver? Hahahahaha! (follows the one of the Robot Masters to find silver, then flies back out with nothing)
Brock: Did you look for silver?
Lugia:It's not the one that I'm looking for.

Celebi: Zorua, what's my scanner says about his power level?
Zoura: It's over 1,000,000!
Arceus: *sighs*

Mew: *to Victini* Later, Victory Flakes! What a nice cereal box.

Ash: I like chocolate!

Iris: By an XBox instead!

Fraxure: Not so fast! You're not dealing with an ordinary Pokémon. It's time for you to meet... (throws an exploding evolution capsule on the ground) Haxorus: Master of... uh-oh! (notices himself as an original form so he uses another exploding evolution capsule to evolve) Haxorus: Master of the Dragons!

Mew: And the delicious power of succotash!

Lugia: To the Nimbasa City , away!

Espeon: Stupid kid. Wait a minute, what's this? Jolteon? My own brother!?
 
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Ash: I'm going to become the best trainer ever!
Max: Too late.
Ash: Max, you're the champion of the elite 4?! How'd you get here so fast?!
Max: Battle me and find out.
Ash: Fine! GO--
Max: Magikarp.
Ash: Wait...I don't want to send out Magikarp
*Magikarp comes out*
Max: Too late, now let's battle a 1-on-1 all-or-nothing match!!
Ash: This...is...so...unfair...
---
Ash: I'll become a pokemon champion!
Misty: Too late.
Ash: Misty?! How'd you get here so fast?!
Misty: Battle me and find out.
Ash : GO! PIKACHU!
Misty: GO! STARMIE!
Ash: *kills Starmie*
Misty: Tch, tch. That move is against the rules. Look here in the Pokemon Rule Book...
Ash: Okay?
*Ash moves next to Misty to see where she is pointing. Misty then brings the book up fast and hard, hitting Ash in the face and knocking him out*
Misty: I win.
--
Ash: I'll become a pokemon master!
Cilan: Too late.
Ash: Cilan?! How'd you get here so fast?!
Cilan: Uh...er...
*FLASHBACK*
Cilan: So, Champion Misty, you'd like me to read the emotional bond between you and Starmie?
Misty: Yes please.
Cilan: Tch. That Starmie hates you with all it's heart. It thinks you're unworthy of it, and tells me you're abusing it. I'm afraid I'm going to have to call Officer Jenny and have her arrest you due to pokemon abuse...but, I'll let this slide if you make me the new champion...
Misty: This is blackmail!
*Cilan grabs phone*
Misty: Fine, you're champion!
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Ash: I'll become a pokemon master!
Nurse Joy: Too late.
Ash: Y'know what...I'm not even going to ask.
 
Cinccino: *pokes Blaziken* Hey, I know you're a rooster who can't fight!
Blazkien: I can if I want to!

Sandile: See you later and have a nice day!

Iris: I wonder if I buy an SNES instead?

Elesa: My Pokémon battles are electrifying!

Servine: The Giant Charizard is coming to get me!
 
Misty: I love Bug types!
May: Just shut up.
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Ash: Hey, Team Rocket! Can I give you my Pikachu?
Team Rocket: Sorry, we already have one!
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Dialga: Master Arceus, I hate controlling time.
Palkia: Master Arceus, I hate controlling space.
Giratina: Monsieur Arceus, I want pie.
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Gardevoir: Lalala, sirknight is my name..la la la!
Gallade: Lalala, missqueen is my name..la la la!
Gardevoir: ...
 
Purrloin: Shalalalala! Choroneko is my name! Shalalalalal!
Lillipup: Shalalalala! Mr. Puppy is my name! Shalalalalal!
Purrloin: Grrr...


Reshiram: Arceus, I'm using fire!
Zekrom: Arceus, I'm using lightning!
Kyurem: Mr. Arceus, I'm want a bowl of spinach!

Snivy: I'm Grass!
Oshawott: I'm Water!
Tepig: I want pie!

Volcarona: Fine then. I'm going back to my own home. *flies away to Relic Castle*
 
Brock : "I hope you guys enjoy, it's a new recipe."

Ash: " This tastes like sh*t! Are you trying to kill us!"

Misty: " I'd rather eat a dead seel."
 
Cilan: Ash, quickly! There's a disaster at Professor Juniper's place!
Ash: Oh no! We have to go!
Iris: Hey...don't forget me!
*once at Professor Juniper's*
Juniper: Ash, you have to go! There are people needing you!
Oak: Ash, I requested you. I want you to come back to Kanto...
Ash: You got it! But, why?
Oak: Oh...er...
*flashback*
Misty: YOU GET ASH BACK TO KANTO THIS MINUTE MISTER! I need to tell him I love him...
Oak: Misty, he's in the far-away Unova region...
Misty: *pulls out photo's from Oak's 80's days. He has an afro and is at the disco* I'll show Ash's mother these...
Oak: EEK! I'll go!
*Back to present*
Oak: Uh...a strange pokemon is appearing and I think only you can get to the bottom of this. It's causing lots of mayhem and has burned down towns!
Ash: Sorry Cilan! Sorry Iris! I'll have to go now!
Iris: No way, bub! My saga isn't over yet, and I'll come with you! To think that you think you can ditch me...such a kid...
Cilan: That kind of gets annoying...calling Ash a kid and all...
Iris: Cilan, never judge a woman! To think you don't know not to judge a book by it's cover...such a--
*Ash and Oak are already gone*
Iris: --we're suckers.
*At Kanto*
Ash: So where's this pokemon?!
Misty: Yoo-hoo! Ash!
Ash: Hi May!
Misty: Er...I'm not May.
Ash: Dawn?
Misty: *getting angry* Try again...
Ash: Oh I know! You're that girl who loves to research bug pokemon, though you hate water pokemon. Now what was your name...
*A few minutes later*
Juniper: Ah! A new trainer! Now, what starter would you like?
???: Juniper, it's me...darn, Misty told me nobody would recongize me after she was through...
Juniper: Wait...Ash?
Ash: Yeah...
Juniper: You look AWFUL!
Ash: I know, Mr. Oak! That idiotic woman, Juniper, should've never sent me back to Kanto! Whatever, woman are always crazy...as Misty proved...
Juniper: You know what Ash, you look dashing. At least in comparison to how you'll look after I'm done...
 
Druddigon:I want my claws sharpened!
Audino: Sorry, day off!

*A giant Victini appears*
Leavanny: Please, don't burn us!

Scyther: Even if it cuts me in half, I will make you whole again!

Exadrill: Hey, men only! Little boys don't belong here. Run home before you get hurt!

Chansey: Listen -- Fighting, fireworks, festivals... That's where it's at!

Articuno: There's something dangerous up ahead, sir! Oh? Freeze it at all costs, soldier!

Moltres: Evil! Remember my name, for I am Moltres! My flames o' justice will have its revenge on you!

Zapdos: Do your worst, but I find it hard to believe that such a low-voltage creature like youhttps://megaman.wikia.com/wiki/CWU-01P can defeat me.
 
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