Application For: Forget-Me-Not
Your application is
pending.
Thank you for showing interest in this role-play, and it seems you so quickly jumped at the chance, too. I do have some questions and concerns about your character, as I usually base acceptance of an application on the number of major discrepancies and how clearly a character is conveyed, while also encouraging the character be unique to their employees in order to create a more interesting group dynamic.
So before I begin I will say that if you haven't already, I encourage you to read through the other accepted applications to get an understanding of the characters in this role-play, and see if there is a role you feel is not only niche of your character, but broadens the spectrum of personality we currently have. If you have any questions on that, you are free to ask me, publicly or in private.
Moving on, these are the discrepancies I find. Don't feel daunted in reading, these are just questions and my makings of what you have written so far:
1) Your character knows Mind Reader. Now, the name is misleading as if one could actually read minds, but it is more like being able to predict someone's movement so that the "reader's" attack can at least make contact. As long as you intend to use this move in the sense of astutely predicting your opponent's physical movement and not actual telepathy, I think we will not have any qualms. If you have another idea for the move, you can pose it to me and I will tell you whether or not that additional use would be overstepping boundaries and sloppily meta-gaming.
2) The gist of his personality, I get, is that he is just friendly and trusting, and requires that of other people. You also says that he has "mood swings" when he gets annoyed, but I think by that wording you may mean that when he gets annoyed that it will clearly show--as would be expected--as opposed to my first impression when I read "mood swing", which was a little more extreme, although if I'm incorrect on what you meant, please tell me.
Now, being mostly friendly and trusting, he will go off sometimes and ponder his rather dramatic background. Which leads me to question firstly, is Benicle a social Pokemon or more reserved but approachable, which are two different things? That, and, with a background where his friend's father somehow manipulates him
four times to commit what appears to be a violent robbery (I assume by his one), to the point where the entirety of this far off Pokemon town of ambiguous size "located nowhere near Jubilee"...
hates strictly him, he somehow has his leg broken at some point in time which is unexplained, and he goes on to live in the wild despite his parents keeping him more or less under house arrest after he was released from prison--and that experience of being in prison and being so unanimously distrusted is not explained either nor even connected. And after only a week, he's depleted his resources, travels the far distance all the way to Jubilee... just to earn money so he can stock up on food for more wild living. All of that for, I assume, him to travel all the way back for just to beat up his friend's dad, which will likely end him up in prison again.
Now, I say this all to say that I think this very distinct side of Benicle is not at all reflected in his personality. He is rash, harbors a deep-seated vendetta against a manipulative, greedy, and possibly poor (the Donphan had Benicle steal
groceries) family friend of sorts, has been to prison and has had his leg broken at some point for whatever reason, and has a determination to grow strong just to use that strength for vigilante retribution that could have possibly been avoided if he communicated to the rest of town that there was another man behind the operation, unless that town has a kind of Salem witch-hunt mentality, which would be interesting to explore.
3) After reading point 2, I've also went over how I feel the logic of the backstory feels fuddled in a lot of places, and if they were elaborated upon more clearly, it could start to make more sense as to why these events unraveled as they did, and may even urge you to change some elements of your story if it means eliminating big questions and inconsistencies.
Those are my comments. If you have any questions, feel free to ask me, but don't feel rushed in making your application now that I've taken a look at it. Cohesion is all about quality, and your character is actually an ambitious one from what you've written so far. I think the main issue is having a backstory that doesn't raise questions and, by its scale, proportionately impacts your character's personality. If you can try to convey these ideas as clearly as you can in your writing, it would make it easier on the rest of us reading your application.
Thank you in advance.