You and your iPad :P I wonder if it fuddles with your words quite so strongly in real life as well? Like, you're out chatting with your friends and you're trying to say 'I believe that animal is a Lesser-Brained Koala' but then out from your pocket bawls a horrible robot voice and it goes, 'I BELIEVE THAT ANIMAL IS BRADLEY MOTHER****ING COOPER' and everyone in the place starts staring at you and you're trying to turn it off and find the switch and make it stop but it WON'T and it's still screaming, and now you're getting funny looks so you're smashing it, you're smashing that horrible hateful Apple machine against the table but it WON'T SHUT UP and now your friends are leaving with looks of disgust, but your iPad is still shrieking obscenities and there are pregnant women and they're crying and you're stabbing at the screen with a plastic fork but it's not working, so you bang your head against it instead but the noise, the noise is drilling through your head and your heart and your bones and everything's blurring into red, it's all going, everything, and the security men are here but you fight them with your plastic fork because this is your fault, it's all your fault, it's your responsibility, and now you're being cuffed and hurled into a van but it doesn't matter any more, nothing matters except that noise, and somewhere far away you can hear it still howling, and you lunge for the doors and you -
OH SHIT HANG ON WAIT I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING FAR MORE IMPORTANT, HOW HAVE I NEVER SHOWN YOU THIS BEFORE ;)