• Our friends from the Johto Times are hosting a favorite Pokémon poll - and we'd love for you to participate! Click here for information on how to vote for your favorites!
  • Welcome to PokéCommunity! Register now and join one of the best fan communities on the 'net to talk Pokémon and more! We are not affiliated with The Pokémon Company or Nintendo.
    Register

how long does it takes you to judge if a person can be your friend or not?

dogtree

    • 155
    Posts
    11
    Years
    • Seen Jun 24, 2019
    there are many factors that contribute to your decision whatever this person can be your friend or not
    such as culture, race, personality, hygiene, income level, the way they talk etcc...

    so how long does it take you ? and what factor is the most important?
     
    I dunno, I'm pretty open about potential friends. Like I'll chat with about anyone initially and if they can hold a decent conversation and don't have any really off-putting views we can probably be friends. I mean I mostly talk to people online so appearance and all has become less important for me all around. And if we talk a lot over a short period of time then we can become friends really fast. :D Basically my default reaction to people is "friend maybe?"

    Unless... you begin with less-than favourable actions and opinions. Unless you've gone after one of my friends before. Unless I've seen you do something I consider awful. Then I'm wary of you. I'm usually gonna be civil (at least at first), but friends? Hmmmm.
     
    Eh, as much as I would like to say I'm not a judgmental person, that's probably not true at all; I'd like to think that I have good gut instincts regarding whether someone will be a decent friend or not. First impressions are made within 7-17 seconds, so I would think that that's how long it would take me to make my decision. I think that's evident in the group of friends I associate with on a daily basis; sure they've had their experiences with drugs, and alcohol, but deep down they're all good people who look out for me, and have my best interest in mind when time comes to it. Factors? I'm honestly open to anyone regardless, but I just feel more comfortable with those in the same culture as myself: Asians. That's the group I've grown up with, and who my parents are happy with me bringing over \:
     
    I'm normally pretty open when it comes to friends since I do plenty of things some I'm just friends with just because we both like to smoke. Most of the time depending on how many things me and the person have in common the closer that friend becomes.
     
    Is it bad that I consider anyone I've hang out with for upwards of five minutes as a friend? :c
     
    If they can know when to shut up is a big plus. Also if I can stand to be around them for more than an hour at a time. If we have similar interests, mainly anime and video games and then music. If they're an attractive female, but not too attractive. That way I might have a chance if I can show I have a neat personality. And finally they have to be able to laugh at my really horrible politically and socially incorrect humor.
     
    Honestly, not that long. It just depends on how much I talk to the person, and how they come off.

    For example (I use this person in so many examples..... I just..... errrh...), this girl at my school. I used to barely talk to her at all, but now that I've actually got more chances to talk to her, I fell we've really grown close. Not as close as I would like (You know what I mean.), but we are much closer than we were. We just sort of clicked, so to speak. We're very much a like, but so very much different. She's from a richer family, I'm from a poorer family. She has 3 brothers and a sister, I have only 1 brother. I could go on, but I won't.

    It really just depends on how many viable and acceptable qualities you have. She's very attractive, and very chatty, so I just sort of learned a lot about her really fast.
     
    Half a second for deciding if I'm interested in a friendship with someone. It's based entirely on their image. Not whether they're good or bad looking, but the feeling I get from their presence. If they interest me or intrigue me, then that's a sure fire way for me to want to be your friend.

    After that, I usually decide if I want to pursue a friendship after a conversation with them. Just a single conversation. Being uncomfortable or awkward around me only makes me want to befriend you more, so it's not like someone needs to be super confident when they're talking to me.

    I've never befriended someone who I didn't like their image, so if you don't pass that with me, you're pretty much out of the game for becoming my friend. Not like it's something people die for, but you know.
     
    I don't really trust a lot of people at first and I take a very long time to give everyone a chance. I keep people as friends if I enjoy their personality or I can get something out of it. Very often I keep people around that are useful to me. People with knowledge or some sort of life skill, and I tolerate them even if I dont actually like who they are.
     
    I'm a pretty paranoid person, I take things to heart pretty easily.
    I've also learned to not trust most people, so in order for me to consider someone as a friend they have to stick around a while and find ways to get past my paranoia.

    As for the most important factor, its loyalty.
     
    Zephyrion said:
    Is it bad that I consider anyone I've hang out with for upwards of five minutes as a friend? :c
    Click to expand...
    bestiez 5evr!1!!!

    Anyway, back on topic:

    It's all about the personality. If you're a judgemental hypocrite, or someone who does not value friendship (y'know, or both), don't bother talking to me. Oh, you're illiterate, and/or close-minded? Gtfo. You like ignoring your friends, even though they took their time to leave you a message, because they actually care about you? Don't even think about being my friend.

    That about sums it up.
     
    um I mean there have been people that I've met and slowly over time realized I really enjoyed their presence and became friends by mutal enjoyment I guess, but like i've never met someone and then tried to decide if I want to befriend them or not. I really put no thought into that it's just whatever happens between us. I feel like this is a pretty long process for me. Unless they break the ice first I most likely won't ask them to hang out outside of wherever we know each other for a very long time unless it's super comfortable between us.
     
    I only hangout with a select few people outside of school.
    So, obviously, I don't really judge anyone in school if I have no intentions of hanging out with them. If you're chill, you're my friend. If not, well probably not.
     
    As long as it takes, heh.

    Some people can draw a very quick and strong reaction out of me, for better or worse, and some people are a matter of steadily sorta figuring out, I guess. Nothing tops the feeling of being with someone that totally strikes a chord with me though, in my book.

    If you can dismiss someone within minutes, you're probably doing it wrong. While it's fair that you can prolly say "LOOK I REALLY DON'T LIKE THAT ABOUT THEM", you'll be surprised how many likeable traits seemingly unpleasant people have.
     
    I'll chat with anyone initially, but I definitely would not ever consider any one of the following more than an acquaintance:

    - People who dress like tramps (in my opinion, not theirs)
    - People who have been to prison
    - People who have ever committed any act of domestic violence (I've been a victim of this, so just no.)
    - People who are into drugs. Weed is also a no-no, but if they don't do it in my presence (and do it very infrequently), then it's OK
    - People who deal drugs, but who do not necessarily intake them
    - People who have ever cheated on their boyfriend / girlfriend
    - People who view sex for pleasure rather than as a love symbol. I don't like promiscuity

    It is very difficult for me to maintain friendships to begin with due to my semi-agoraphobic nature. As well, individuals who do not have any education past highschool are hard for me to maintain friendships with; we're just not on the same "life path," so it's quite trying to stick by them.

    Sure, they might be nice people, but it's important for me to have friends that share similar values, outlooks, education, etc. Otherwise, it'd just bug me and I'd find myself scorning you more than friends should. Better just to not be friends if it's like that :)
     
    I'd say it takes about a week or so. I'm usually a very open person and don't hate anyone right away. I like for that person to be very understanding of me too. If the person fails to realize that I'm not like them or anyone else, than it's goodbye.
     
    It takes a really long time for me to approach other people, but if I manage to get it done, I tend to trust them really fast. Unfortunately it doesn't end well for the most part, because to be honest: I don't know how friendship works (sounds strange, but summs it up, pretty much).

    Not being able to hold any friendship, sadly, makes it harder for me to approach other people. xD
    Well, some day I'll figure it out, hopefully.
     
    Last edited:
    You must log in or register to reply here.
    Back
    Top