~Make A Wish and have it horribly corrupted ~

[Cosmega]

Granted, but now you're locked in that room forever, and nobody will ever find you since only you know the entrance.

I wish I could eat everything I wanted without ever gaining weight.

 

[Megan]

Granted, but now without all the sugar everything will just taste as blant as it gets.

I wish for communication between people to get easier.

 

[Zeostar]

Granted. We all stay in one big happy circle forever

Spoiler:

I wish for batteries to never die

 

[Cosmega]

Granted! Now, the devices die instead.

I wish my conversations were never awkward

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, you can no longer communicate at all... can't be an awkward conversation if you can't have any at all!

I wish for a meme I don't know yet.

 

[Megan]

Granted, but it only becomes relevant in a hundred years in the future.

I wish for old memes to come back.

 

[Starlight]

Granted... be prepared to see a LOT of Friend-zone Fiona and ONLY Friend-zone Fiona for the rest of your life!

I wish to get tickets to that one thing I want to go to.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, but as you arrive at the thing it suddenly gets canceled because too many people named Fiona attended it D=

I wish to never have to get up early again =)

 

[Megan]

Granted, but the days are now only 12 hours long and you still need to work for 8+ hours a day.

I wish for a machine that can create food out of nothing.

 

[Fact Checking Gardevoir]

Granted, but the food tastes like... nothing!

I wish for a new Mass Effect game with a new race of biotic apex made of Gardevoirs!

 

[StCooler]

Granted, but they create a new race of demonic princesses and end up banning all of them!

I wish for a better reaction time.

 

[Cosmega]

Granted, now you react before anything happens!

I wish I could run faster

 

[Megan]

Granted, but now you'll never be able to fly again.

I wish for self confidence.

 

[Fact Checking Gardevoir]

Granted, you are now confident that you can jump from Earth to the Moon!

Granted, now you react before anything happens!

I wish I could run faster

Granted, but you are now constantly being chased by Wile E. Coyote.

I wish to have an adventure with the Looney Tunes!

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, you get to replace Elmer Fudd and chase them around shooting black holes at them! =D

I wish for my own private theme park =3

 

[Starlight]

Granted you have a theme park all to yourself...

Spoiler:

I wish for unlimited bag space.

 

[StCooler]

Granted, your bag has a big hole, the whole universe is the bad space.

I wish to be able to control my hunger.

 

[Bice]

Granted. The only options are "stuffed to the brim" and "voraciously starving".

I wish I wouldn't overheat when I went to bed.

 

[Megan]

Granted, but you always have cold feet.

I wish for better time management.

 

[Starlight]

Granted, your timing is impeccable but you decide to use your skills for a life of crime ;(

I wish to sing again.