Open relationships

antemortem

antemortem

rest after tomorrow
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    How do you feel about open relationships? Do they ruin whatever sacredness relationships are 'supposed' to share? Are they effective in alleviating whatever sexual tension there might be in a relationship? Do they have a different purpose? Are they effective in doing anything other than letting your partner 'cheat' without consequences?
     
    I'd be completely down for an open relationship, even it was just one sided. >_>

    I'm not scared by alternative lifestyles. Though I definitely understand this sort of thing is not for everybody.
     
    Dude, a relationship is not a commitment until you make it one.

    Personally I feel that open relationships are a cool way to learn what you like, especially when you're starting out and figuring out what you like, what you don't like. Of course, when you start to get really close to someone, that's when you have to tone it down. But really, if you're open about it and the partner's cool with it, then what's the big deal? A relationship is what you want it to be, really.
     
    I have a cousin who's married and in an open relationship. They've been together 12 years now. Hey if it works for them and they're safe then great! It's not something I'd consider or want though- I'm very much monogamous.
     
    I think open relationships are great provided you're both the right kind of person to be in one. If you're prone to jealousy (which I fear I am), then it's definitely not for you. I would be open to trying it, but I think I'd rather try a closed relationship first :)
     
    I don't know the point of open relationships, but they're not for me. I'm not someone who can easily think of someone I love and care about deeply having those same feelings towards someone else and actively showing them the same feelings they show for me. I'm not someone who is possessive over people, or who gets jealous (a fault in the eyes of my ex), but someone wanting to be in an open relationship with me just tells me that they don't want to break up with me, but they want to see other people, and that to me is unacceptable. I value myself far too much to agree to something like that.
     
    I am not okay with them for myself, but I don't judge those who chose to partake in them. All I would ever be thinking is "Did you like her body better than mine, did she have a prettier face, do you think about her when you are with me..."...nope, I wouldn't want that stuff in my head all of the time, definitely not for me.
     
    I think that most open relationships would end in disasters. If you're into that stuff, just go for the friends with benefits approach instead. The reason why most open relationships don't work is become one of the partners get jealous or too attached to the other partner. The outcome seems to be disaster most of the time.
     
    Human being, by their very nature, are not monogamous creatures. Monogamy is a concept imposed on us by society, of which I am a product of. The very fact that although I am in a committed relationship my eyes still wander is a testament to this fact. Perhaps if I was raised in a different society where it is perfectly acceptable to have more than one sexual partner I would be more open to it personally.

    That being said, however, if others are open to the concept of open relationships, I say go for it. Provided it is what you and your partners agree to, there is nothing that should prevent you from living the way that feels best for you.
     
    Well in my honest opinion, I would remain a complete neutral in this but I agree. This kind of thing will most likely end in a very bad way, because eventually one of the two people in the open relationship would get too acquainted with the other.

    But if you absolutely need to make it work, be sure when you spend the night with someone, the least you could do is mention who it is, it wouldn't be considered an affair because its a open relationship, unless you keep it a secret that's considered cheating.
     
    I wouldn't be able if I start falling in love with the person I'm having an open relationship with.
    Very bad considering they ask your permission first if it's okay with you and then you say yes and then you get too attached and then you regret it and then you get stuck and it will be very painful. Save yourself from that EXP.
    I have respect to those who make it work.. but that ^ would likely be the scenario for me.

    I'd stick with the single and ready to mingle approach, you could screw anyone you like and wouldn't feel guilty because you aren't committed to any of them. Just be careful and things.. :)

    I do believe in long lasting and fruitful relationships, and that it only takes ONE person.
    I'm definitely not being a prude, but when you meet that someone, you wouldn't even dare look at anyone else for a loonnggg time.​
     
    Not sure if I could pull off an "open relationship" personally. Although when I was with my significant other I let them kiss other people? I just didn't let it bother me all that much, because kissing is a fun thing and I understand the appeal behind it. They didn't have a problem with me kissing other people either so it wasn't a huge deal.

    I was also totally fine with the idea of a threesome? Maybe I'm weird but as long as I was involved I wouldn't of felt all that bad with my S.O having sex with another person. If I wasn't included then yeah, I would have a bit of a problem I suppose. I'm just a fairly open person with these sorts of things. I remember when I brought up the whole threesome thing with him he was all "oh wow a lot of people aren't cool with that" so I guess it is what it is
     
    I think an open relationship would kill me in the long term. If I wanted to have sex with different people than I wouldn't commit to a relationship at all in the first place. Just the thought of letting your girlfriend sleep with other men makes me feel nauseous. I take commitment in a relationship quite seriously, though I hope this doesn't make me seem possessive. :s
     
    To me, "open relationship" is an awful oxymoron. A relationship, to me, means commitment, partnership and privacy. Inviting more than one person into that situation, in my opinion, just dilutes any feelings of actual love.

    How people manage it without getting jealous I don't know, although if you're not getting jealous at all perhaps you should just drop the 'relationship' and call it friends with benefits.
     
    People are different in their needs, some reserve their sweet kisses and roosting as a personal intimate ting. Others while still needing the stability and safety of a single partner, may have a particular fancy of double team or simply dont feel that sweet kisses and roosting is a tag team thing.
    Its okay. People are like that, different.

    However. I heard too many tales from friends and relations where Part A in the relationship wants it to be a open one, and Part B pretends its okay, for various reasons.
    Like insecurity, Fear of losing Partner A.
    Or that Part A or B had sudden regrets this arrangement when their partner started to muck about. Jealously. Or that the new partner C didn't like that A or B is in a relationship. Hence the drama and complications grow like a infestation.

    Those who do have a need to muck about also needs to be fair and honest with their main partner. They will need to be able to communicate clearly why they need this in a open light. And also respect their main partner and keep his/her feelings in mind.

    I prefer the sweet kisses and roosting to be a couples thing. But I also know its not the right thing for all.

    At last of this "sermon" I will say to you. Honest open communication is the ground stone in any relationship building, If you build a relationship without it you will find it toppling over to a ruin.
     
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    Def not something I'd be OK with or down to do. I believe that when you're with someone that's the only person on earth you should have eyes for. Whenever I've been in a relationship the person I was the with was literally the only person I had any interest in and it's like no other woman even exists, just how I am. I have strict codes I follow about loyalty as well that I would never break. I also get attached very easy to a person I'm in love with and I feel that dependency should be a two-way street where you need each other and not so much other people. My views on relationships are very long and very involved and complicated I suppose.
     
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