Problems socialising at a new college/university

[Nathan]

If anything is stopping me from making friends then its the hostility I've been recieving from a gang of 8-9 girls in my class. (yes even in uni girls can be nasty) it really brings my mood down and not attend classes at all. :(

Geez, thought they grew up after high school. From my experience, only way to get rid of them is to shrug it off. Don't show it affects you or your life will be hell.

 

[Candy]

If anything is stopping me from making friends then its the hostility I've been recieving from a gang of 8-9 girls in my class. (yes even in uni girls can be nasty) it really brings my mood down and not attend classes at all. :(

Piece of advice: Just ignore them. They'll get bored of you eventually if you don't show any responses. :>

That's how I once rid away those that were being hostile to me, anyway.

 

[Tamara❤]

Thanks for the advice guys, ignoring them is always the best approach. (I would have done nothing anyway, I'm definitely no fighter) I'm trying to rise above it and make new friends outside of class as well as make time to meet old friends from high school. This makes me feel less lonely. :)

 

[moon]

I never had a problem with that - I am an extremely social person and I make friends easily.

Have you tried joining a student org? There's TONS at every college, and it's a great way to make friends. Service fraternities are particularly good for that.

Also, try leaving your video games at home. That will force you to engage with your environment.

This :D I've always been part of groups and sections at uni, together with people who study the same thing as I do or share interests. Right now I'm not super active since I have so much school work, but at least I just joined a choir which is great fun. We practice at my place and some other people's places once every week. And with my section (organisation consisting of students from my program and some similar ones) there's almost every week some pub or party or event to go to and just hang out or compete in all kinds of things for fun.

But I know a lot of people who simply never get into the uni social life and prefer to socialize with their old friends or just outside official uni stuff overall. Or, not socialize at all I suppose but I wouldn't know those people so :p

And yeah, you really don't have to stick to the people in your own class. I haven't even had a real class for a whole year now. If you like to play games for example, isn't there a board game or video game or even rpg club at your college? We have several I think :p Being a "nerd" is getting much more socially accepted than it was only a few years ago. I don't know why but I'm not really complaining :)

 

[Shining Raichu]

I don't know why I said janky, that was not the right word to use.

I'm pretty sure that's not even a word.

 

[Tamara❤]

Our moderator has a signature of jangly bits being shaken about. Heh *shrug* :3

Also I don't know if its just my university but I don't think ones in the UK have fraternities/sororities etc.
Btw I made a kind-of friend today :)

 

[Kenchiin]

Thanks for the advice guys, ignoring them is always the best approach. (I would have done nothing anyway, I'm definitely no fighter) I'm trying to rise above it and make new friends outside of class as well as make time to meet old friends from high school. This makes me feel less lonely. :)

Otherwise, we are always here 8D

Our moderator has a signature of jangly bits being shaken about. Heh *shrug* :3

LOOOOOOOL!!

I LOVE THIS.

 

[Meganium]

It is what it says in the title :/
I'm quite shy around new people plus if I got my DS or PC games with me, I would rather hide in the library and play them. This definitely has not earned me any friends.

A year has passed I'm in my second year and I still have no friends. >.<;

#storyofmylife

I'm a library regular. It's my "introverted" place whenever I feel like being alone with my things and all. First two years at college and I didn't really make a few friends, only talked to just one person and that was all, and I always had thought college was easier to make friends than high school. I thought wrong!

What I had noticed while attending uni was "fandom sighting". I made a couple of friends who are into TWD, My Little Pony, and basically video gaming in general...all because I was either wearing a t-shirt, or playing a specific video game (like Pokemon or SSB). I never approached to these people, they approached to me. xD

That's where I also met Pinkie-Dawn, a PC member who used to attend my current school.

I'm still attached to my old friends, but I always have room for more newer ones. Like my co-workers, who are also students at my uni whom I see once in a while.

Only advice I can give you? Don't "isolate" yourself too much. People will think you're anti-social when really, you're not. Instead of going to the library, try visiting the student center in your uni (or cafeteria, or any place of socialization that isn't the classroom or library). Don't be too scared of people, it may seem like they're scared of you, but we're adults. We welcome anyone with open arms. Most of all, don't be scared to say HELLO. It will open every door.

 

[Tamara❤]

Otherwise, we are always here 8D



LOOOOOOOL!!

I LOVE THIS.

;3


I have lab on Monday which means...group work. .-. Wish me luck! >.<

 

[Raigeki]

It's difficult.. At my school, everybody loves anime and manga, everybody plays Pokémon in class and brings their NDS to school, everybody listens to rock and metal music and so on. And we are adults.

It was incredibly easy for me to get comfortable and make friends because of this. Also, what worked for me was this:

Always be happy. Always help people and be a good guy, even if you don't want to or if they don't deserve your kindness. Always try to say the right things and seem a little intelligent but not too much. NEVER talk behind anybody's back - not even if everybody hates the person.
Put yourself out there. Upload funny pictures, send stupid snapchats, create stuff, play guitar, make something useful for your class.. Anything. Just don't be the silent kid under the rock somewhere.

 

[Thursday]

I'm horribly awkward around new people and the one (good) way I've found to make friends is to 1. make jokes (I'm normally sarcastic and apparently people don't mind that?) and 2. Find something people hate/like and expand from there. In a few of my classes with group work we would always finish quickly and then talk about things we like/dislike. Easy way to make a friend in class.

That, or find someone else who is also quiet and plan world domination. Always works like a charm.

 

[Pendraflare]

I have almost no friends that i've really gotten to know at college (at least not ones I see on a regular basis), other than the ones that live in my suite and the ones who are in classes with me. Doesn't help that I too have a tendency to often play my (3)DS or computer instead of socializing most of the time. I even attended a homecoming dance last month (I didn't want to, but these two ladies told me why they felt I should even though they wouldn't go themselves), and it was not a successful night for me at all when it came to who was there.