Superpowers... with a flaw!

[StCooler]

The problem? You threaten the very balance of the universe... All governments unite to track you and send you to another Solar System far, far away, for safety.

I have the power to increase / stop / prevent the growth of hair.

 

[Starlight]

Granted! But it only works on mole-rats!

I want to be invisible

 

[ReKoil]

You are, but your clothes aren't! no wait that's already the generic issue with it in movies etc.

You are invisible, but for some reason it only works when nobody is around =o

I'll take the power of super-human endurance.

 

[StCooler]

The problem? It activates only after one hour of running. You still have to run one hour before being super-endurant :(

I can breathe underwater like a fish, without limitation of time.

 

[AMP017]

Granted. However you are only allowed to breathe underwater and instantly die if any part of you is above the surface.
I want the power to turn into any pokemon.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, you are now Ditto.

I want the power to turn any food I touch into delicious chocolate =D

 

[Starlight]

Granted... but you can no longer touch any food you consume or it'll kill you... good luck with that straw!

I want the power of x-ray vision

 

[Megan]

The problem: now everyone calls you lewd and avoids you.

I want the power of moderation!

 

[StCooler]

The problem? You can only moderate on EmptyCommunity, the community who likes void and emptiness, and thus never posts...

I have the power of having lucid dreams.

 

[ReKoil]

Sure thing. Unfortunately you like your dreams more than reality and refuse to come back. You are now in a vegetative state in the hospital D=

I have the power to resist the temptation of chocolate....

 

[Starlight]

You have it! But I ate your entire unwanted stash and died :(

I need the power of song...

 

[Megan]

You have the power of song which is useful for solving crossword puzzles! And only crossword puzzles!

I want the power of cleansing!

 

[StCooler]

The problem? You can cleanse only your soul, which was already pure :)

I want to power of visit heaven and come back whenever I want.

 

[ReKoil]

Sure. You'll be coming back as someone else every time though, your soul can only go into the freshly deceased after all!

I want the power to see the future

You have it! But I ate your entire unwanted stash and died :(

noooooooooooooo 😭

 

[Jazzy]

Granted! However, the future you see is always irrelevant! Have fun seeing yourself ten years in the future, taking a nap

I'd like to be able to teleport :)

 

[Megan]

Sure, but the calibration is so stingy you could easily end up somewhere in space because you didn't calculate your target location correctly.

I'll take the power of flight!

 

[StCooler]

The problem? You need kerosen to actually fly.

I have the power of mastering anything I try to learn in one week.

 

[ReKoil]

You have it.
I hope you're good at the upkeep too though. As you'll also completely forget whatever you mastered after a week of not using it and will have to re-learn it =\

I have the power to see people's aura

 

[Jazzy]

Okay, but now you can only see their aura, and nothing else.

I have the power to change my appearance

 

[Megan]

Your problem is that you can only change into whatever it is once.

I want the power of future sight.