I have some unpopular Harry Potter opinions.
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I don't disagree with anything you said, but you do realize that fanfics, headcanons and ships are more about the idea of a possible dynamic rather than actually following the fact as written, right?
In fan spaces canon is really a strong suggestion, rather than cold hard fact and a number of fanfics will go out of their way to massively change circumstances to address some of the points you made so the ship / idea can even work.
(Also, a huge part of Harry / Hermione was probably because of a combination of the common expectation - especially at the time - that "the girl" in the YA novel has to end up with one of the male leads, Ron / Hermione being possibly an even worse fit than Harry / Hermione, and good old self inserting / projecting.)
And since we're talking Harry Potter, let's go with a current take.
"Death of the author is a thing, and participation in a fandom does not mean platforming an author."
Yes, J.K. Rowling is not the greatest person and while that absolutely does sour a part of the world to me and many others, and I definitely do not plan on buying any of her merchandise, books or creative works again, that means absolutely nothing regarding fan spaces.
Fanfic, Fanart and fan communities can have a great impact on people, are a gateway for creative expression and are not necessarily platforming the author. Some fans will do that and I do agree that that's bad and we should call them out, but saying "The author is cancelled so the whole franchise is cancelled" is counter productive at best (will only turn people away from the cause) and creates a media drought at worst because people are just generally crappy and the further along we go in time the crappier past people become by hindsight.