Serious maintaining optimism

Her

Her

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    many are and will remain incredibly disheartened by the recent election results in the uk
    in tandem with an increasingly weak-willed and denialist attitude to climate change around us, increasing lack of trust in the governments supposed to serve the people, a seemingly unrestrained climb towards fascism around the globe, our food losing dire amounts of nutritional value over generations.... it can be so hard to find any sense of meaning or positivity to keep the body going

    tell the forum
    what do y'all do to keep out of the fringes of despair
     
    I'm in general fairly detached from society, so modern drama doesn't affect me as much. It does get a little annoying when I'm forced to experience people complaining on and on. However, I'm currently also trying to incorporate some values from the ancient art of stoicism into my current lifestyle (because: yk, being detached from society also has its downsides).
     
    This is probably going to sound bad, but I stave off complete despair by telling myself that none of this has anything to do with me. The impact on my life will be minimal, or I will be long dead before the impact can be felt so I don't need to worry about it. I didn't start it, so I don't have to take responsibility for it, or even think about it if I don't want to.

    There's not much else I CAN do, really. I don't have the ability to make any significant changes to the way the world is, so I do what I can - I don't vote for fascist liars, I don't litter, I'll sign petitions in support of good causes so they'll be debated in Parliament, on VERY rare occasions I will give to an environmental-focused charity, etc. - and just try to live as best I can and let everyone and everything else just get on with it the same way. I don't have to be party to the human race's destruction of itself and everything around it, so I'm not. Maybe I'm contributing to it all indirectly by my deliberate indifference, but it's the best I can do, honestly...as the recent election has proven, my voice doesn't count for much. I'm sure I could get more involved, but the more involved I get with things, the worse I feel.

    That said, despair is much like happiness - it's fleeting. It's not meant to be maintained, and the longer it IS maintained, the more commonplace and unremarkable it becomes. Can't be sad about things forever. These things just go away on their own after enough time for me, and even if it's easier for them to come back than it is for feelings of happiness...well, that's just life. The rarer moments of happiness make them that much more precious, especially during times like these. Fighting for them won't make them happen more often, though.

    So, yeah. Indifference is my cure. It's an imperfect one, but I haven't committed suicide yet, so it's clearly working for me.
     
    i am currently working on turning myself into a self-important statue where i take no consideration of the people around me while i wax on about philosophy that no one cares about
     
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    I have my art, a wonderful support group, and a great therapist. It's not always enough, but I'm lucky to have the coping mechanisms I do. Optimism can be a difficult thing to obtain and maintain, but I'm thankful to at least find content indifference in the face of political upheaval / bad situations.
     
    My suggestion would be to use the holiday season to tune out the news, focus on yourself and healing yourself, get yourself back into a proper headspace that you think you will be able to focus on politics or the news again, and then get back out there and work on making the difference you want.

    You are not going to be able to give it your all to make the changes in your country that you believe should be made if you cannot give yourself a break and center yourself first.
     
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    EnglishALT said:
    My suggestion would be to use the holiday season to tune out the news, focus on yourself and healing yourself, get yourself back into a proper headspace that you think you will be able to focus on politics or the news again, and then get back out there and work on making the difference you want.
    Click to expand...

    I wish this could work with me. :(

    Anyone who can turn their melancholy to the holidays and look forward to being with friends and family and good food and unconditional love absolutely should! But the holiday season is notoriously bad for many, many people for a multitude of reasons.

    If you're one of those people, please consider practicing self-compassion and learning proper breathing exercises. I've found that keeps me fairly sane during what I can only consider to be the worst time of year emotionally.
     
    I'm not politically aligned with OP or many others around here (wouldn't vote for the Tories either for what it's worth) but I think everyone can take solace in the fact that the pendulum tends to sway the other way eventually. I just wish things didn't have to be so extreme on either side. Tuning out of current events for a while can help as EnglishAlt suggested. Sometimes news will be shoved in your face even if you're trying to keep your head in the sand but assuming the news doesn't affect you directly in the moment then it might be easier to focus on self-care for a while instead.
     
    Giving service is satisfying. Once a year I would sign up as a volunteer for the Special Olympics. Usually I would be assigned to help a specific person, and if I could brighten that persons day then whatever mood I felt I was in could be pushed aside for the time being.
     
    How do I remain optimistic? Easy.

    I look at a remark online by someone defending Trump, like this one, posted on an article about Ms. Ocasio-Coertez by someone calling himself "Gruppenfuher":

    AOC! You are sooooooooo smart. I'll bet that in your 29 years of experience, you've seen some real life experiences! like the time you made that margarita, or the rum and coke! Man! you sure have it wired!
    Click to expand...

    ...and then I stop and consider the likely scenario should this guy if he ever had the nerve to say it in public, using his actual name.

    It's rather reassuring.
     
    I don't know if I can fully relate. Global issues don't play a factor in my mood as I don't keep up to date with anything anymore. I'm not the kind of person to join a cause or have very strong feelings about something. I've discovered over the past few years that I'm a very changeable/adaptable person and so outside issues around me have little impact. I find what gets me down is my own self. I am incredibly hard on myself and quick to put myself down. Overtime it can be so draining to feel awful about yourself and the annoying part is it's literally just me.

    Luckily I do have good friends and family in my life that help me realize how absurd my own self dialogue can be. I definitely recommend reaching out to people in your life. I've been surprised before by just coworkers. I also really enjoy nature so going for walks into the woods to clear my head has helped a lot. I find the best combination to staying optimistic is to reach out to others, make time for yourself, and learn to let things go.
     
    I look up good/uplifting news to remind myself it's not all bad out there. Mostly good deeds and articles on the environment. The world may be in a horrific state but at least there are people out there making things better. Hobbies also help in this situation - just immersing myself in photography or gaming and shutting off the world for a bit.
     
    I honestly tend to eschew optimism as a motivation. We need hope to move forward, sure, but I like to let my pessimism motivate me. I also think it gives me a clearer view of people. People are worse than we want to think, and our denial causes us to make mistakes in leading them. But I honestly think by looking at people without rose colored glasses, by seeing all the bad, you get a clearer view of the real good. Like, take elections. I'm less up on UK politics, but in the US, we talk up the citizenry and say we support one policy or another based on how we vote. But that's nonsense, trying to get coherent and consistent policy based on electoral results doesn't work. A lot of our elections are decided by undecided voter, and these people consistently show the lowest levels of engagement in politics. They're the ones paying the least attention, they vote based on vague impressions and sound bites, and they DECIDE the elections. Sounds pretty cynical and pessimistic, right? But here's the thing: these people are not very political but they're still TRYING. They still want to be involved in the complicated and intimidating topic of maintaining our democracy, and that's wonderful!

    So, to sum it up:
    The optimistic lie: the citizens are informed and make coherent choices in voting.
    The pessimistic truth: The citizens deciding elections have the least idea what's going on.
    The human beauty underneath: They're still TRYING!
    How we can use this: don't rely on complicated policy discussions and thoughts to win elections. Use personality!
     
    I hold the belief that people are generally good. Most behaviours are learned, so you can teach the person why a certain behaviour is bad. I'm talking mostly about general society, not these million/billionaires who hoard their wealth. Also I need to stay positive, my health is in the shitter, I don't need my attitude to be.
     
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