[Life] Mental health club

Megan said:
I don't know what you did wrong. But you sure reminded of those times in the past when I ruined a couple perfectly fine friendships. It actually still haunts me, even years afterwards. But it also required me to rethink how I interact and treat the people I interact with. ^^"

You may not be able to change what happened. But you're still alive. And that means you'll have many more opportunities to do the right thing! And you don't need to be alone, either. There's enough people willing to listen to you and your worries! :)
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I just keep doing stupid mistakes. I don't see any point in trying.

And TBH, what purpose am I even serving by existing?
 
Crustan said:
I just keep doing stupid mistakes. I don't see any point in trying.
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So does everyone else lol. Your stupid mistakes are no more stupid than anyone else's. It may hurt, sure, but that's no reason to give up over it.

Crustan said:
And TBH, what purpose am I even serving by existing?
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You could ask the same thing about humans as a whole depending on one's personal beliefs. If all life is just a big cosmic accident and one random space rock away from extinction, then what's the point of anything at all? That doesn't mean people should just lay down and die. And if life was made by some divine figure/s, then that means life has value, and therefore also shouldn't just be frivolously thrown away.

And even if your life holds no value to you anymore, you can still use it to add value to the lives of others. And I don't mean in some grand gesture either, even just a smile to a person having a horrible day can make a difference. Even small things can have value to others that feel like they have none.
 
Crustan said:
I just keep doing stupid mistakes. I don't see any point in trying.
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We all do, but we have got to hold on because life is worth it!

Crustan said:
And TBH, what purpose am I even serving by existing?
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The purpose is for you to decide, Crustan. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Your friends here (me included) are happy to have met you and to have you here with us!
 
Crustan said:
I just keep doing stupid mistakes. I don't see any point in trying.

And TBH, what purpose am I even serving by existing?
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What seems like a huge mistake now might not seem that way in the future. Time can sometimes provide a different perspective on things. Hopefully this will be the case!

But even if it always remains a huge mistake, than just know that you can't undo the past, only learn from it, and try to make sure it doesn't happen again. None of us are able to make it through life mistake free, that's how we grow unfortunately.

Many people are able to turn their lives around after making huge mistakes, and you can to! Try not to let whatever it was own you, don't let it hurt you twice!

I honestly feel you need to try to forgive yourself for whatever it was. You are clearly hurt over it, and obviously regret it. That means you probably didn't intend it, so please try to love yourself enough to forgive yourself, or at least not beat yourself up quite so much.

I don't know if there's something like Samaritans in your part of the world, but if there is then don't be ashamed to ask for help if you need it. I know how it feels to hate yourself over mistakes, and I probably wouldn't be here now if I hadn't reached out for help.

You can get through this Crustan, we believe in you ❤️
 
I feel like I'm in a very weird spot, mentally. You know how different groups of people still have some sense of community between each other? Autistic people can bond over their autism, trans people can bond over their gender identity, etc.?

So, a couple years ago I got my SzPD diagnosis. I was suspecting it even before that. But at least that way I got the confirmation. This disorder comes with certain drawbacks, like: acute apathy, lack of emotions (not being able to enjoy much) and a massive difficulty in feeling part of a community. It also comes with a lack of personality ("not feeling like a person") and an inherent lack of motivation (which is why getting better at skills, like art, is pretty difficult for me). To "make up" for those drawbacks I'm pretty resistant to loneliness, I can stay alone for a pretty long time if I want to. I can also make up all kinds of characters and worlds and what not in my head. Though, putting them to paper is extremely difficult. ^^"

So, a little while ago I kinda got an idea to look if there are subreddits for people like me. I actually found some and my first thought was "finally something I can relate to". But it didn't take too long until I realized "Oh, no, these people are exactly like me!". The problem here being that they're all not really the community building type of people. ^^"

There's also still some stuff bothering me on PC. For a couple years I've now tried to interact with people more and work on stuff like empathy, etc. Meanwhile I've seen a bunch of people, new users and old ones, whom I interact sometimes on a daily basis, who seem to enjoy being among each other a lot more and who keep interacting with me to somewhat of a "minimum", I suppose? Even if people do explicitly interact with me in particular (e.g. via PM), they do seem to keep somewhat of a distance and I'm not sure what to make of that.

Like, I know I still have a lot to work on. And a lot of stuff I won't be able to overcome (a downside of a "disorder" is that it's permanent and I'd need to "mask" my way through certain situations no matter what (can I even use the word "mask" or is that something that's for autistic people?)).

Like, I'm really just sitting here, thinking "What do I need to change? What can I do better?"
 
Megan said:
I feel like I'm in a very weird spot, mentally. You know how different groups of people still have some sense of community between each other? Autistic people can bond over their autism, trans people can bond over their gender identity, etc.?

So, a couple years ago I got my SzPD diagnosis. I was suspecting it even before that. But at least that way I got the confirmation. This disorder comes with certain drawbacks, like: acute apathy, lack of emotions (not being able to enjoy much) and a massive difficulty in feeling part of a community. It also comes with a lack of personality ("not feeling like a person") and an inherent lack of motivation (which is why getting better at skills, like art, is pretty difficult for me). To "make up" for those drawbacks I'm pretty resistant to loneliness, I can stay alone for a pretty long time if I want to. I can also make up all kinds of characters and worlds and what not in my head. Though, putting them to paper is extremely difficult. ^^"

So, a little while ago I kinda got an idea to look if there are subreddits for people like me. I actually found some and my first thought was "finally something I can relate to". But it didn't take too long until I realized "Oh, no, these people are exactly like me!". The problem here being that they're all not really the community building type of people. ^^"

There's also still some stuff bothering me on PC. For a couple years I've now tried to interact with people more and work on stuff like empathy, etc. Meanwhile I've seen a bunch of people, new users and old ones, whom I interact sometimes on a daily basis, who seem to enjoy being among each other a lot more and who keep interacting with me to somewhat of a "minimum", I suppose? Even if people do explicitly interact with me in particular (e.g. via PM), they do seem to keep somewhat of a distance and I'm not sure what to make of that.

Like, I know I still have a lot to work on. And a lot of stuff I won't be able to overcome (a downside of a "disorder" is that it's permanent and I'd need to "mask" my way through certain situations no matter what (can I even use the word "mask" or is that something that's for autistic people?)).

Like, I'm really just sitting here, thinking "What do I need to change? What can I do better?"
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It's a bit depressing how long this has gone without a reply from anyone... >.>
Beyond just saying that I'm sorry you've gotta live with that, all I've got is a suggestion. Reach out to the people who most interest you more often. Sometimes it's literally just a case of them not knowing you want to talk or do something with them, or them not wanting to bother you. At least that's how it is for me and other people. The biggest reason Setsuna and I became friends like we are is because she kept responding to my replies with interest in keeping the conversation going, but if all I got was a 'thanks for the questions here's a quick answer next!' we'd never have gotten to know each other well enough to call each other friends. I got to know PK a bit better and we started hanging out more when he started talking to me more as well. I'm positive that there are people more than happy to be friends with you, and a good way to let them know that is with taking leaps and asking them first.
 
i swear to god i am THIS close to just ending it all.
the world's basically on the verge of nuclear war and once the usa gets trump back in office i will lose all my rights. why the hell do i even bother anymore. it will never get better
 
tazmily menace said:
i swear to god i am THIS close to just ending it all.
the world's basically on the verge of nuclear war and once the usa gets trump back in office i will lose all my rights. why the hell do i even bother anymore. it will never get better
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I don't want to come across like I'm downplaying the danger of Trump, because he probably is going to be really, really bad. But he's also almost 80 and famously unhealthy, so he probably won't be around much longer. Meanwhile, nobody else in MAGAworld has his "charm" and the movement will likely fall apart shortly after his death; causing enough bigots to crawl back into their holes to allow any rights lost to be restored. I can 1000% understand being cynical and disaffected after the events of 2 months ago, but "ending it all" isn't the answer. You still have so much to live for!
 
tazmily menace said:
no i don't
i honestly truly don't
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I know that feeling perfectly. If you truly have no other reason to live, live for spite. Spite all the evil PoS who live to tell others how they ought to live their lives and treat anyone and everyone who doesn't do it 'their way' like they shouldn't be alive. You killing yourself will be giving people like "him" exactly what they want. F''' them. They don't deserve to have that power over you. Every day you live is a day they lose and don't get what they want. Spit in their eyes with every breath. My 2 cents.
 
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Alex_Among_Foxes said:
I know that feeling perfectly. If you truly have no other reason to live, live for spite. Spite all the evil PoS who live to tell others how they ought to live their lives and treat anyone and everyone who doesn't do it 'their way' like they shouldn't be alive. You killing yourself will be giving people like "him" exactly what they want. F''' them. They don't deserve to have that power over you. Every day you live is a day they lose and don't get what they want. Spit in their eyes with every breath. My 2 cents.
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i'm sorry
there's no hope for me
 
tazmily menace said:
i'm sorry
there's no hope for me
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I'm sorry to hear about how you're hurting. I don't believe we have spoken before, but the fact that you don't want a world where human rights are taken away or where we are on the brink of nuclear war makes you sound like the kind of decent people that we need in a world full of cruelty. A person can't always see much worth in themselves, but you might be surpised how others would feel about you. Often there is someone like a friend, a teacher, family member, a pet who you mean something to, or somebody waiting to meet you that would value you. People here are reaching out because we don't want to see anything bad happen to you, and hope that you will stay with us.

I am pained by what I see happening in the world too, and am not very happy with my personal life either- sometimes I just want to disappear because it frequently feels like a pointless drag to more of the same, but even though I feel a lot of disappointment there are those moments of happiness too that come into my life. Simply making shapes in the snow yesterday under the moon was something that brought me a feeling a peace. Those little escapes could be in a video game you play, people you like, foods you taste, places you want to go, books you enjoy reading.

Killing ourselves might seem like a way to get away from the suffering, but we're really just succumbing to it and removing ourselves from the good parts in life that are there or could present themselves. I know those nice opportunities that might make us smile or laugh can be hard to see, but having lost individuals in my life last year to illness, I know that all of them would rather be here right now still partaking in some of the things we might not think much of, if they could choose, than no longer existng in this world at all.

Please don't go Tazmily.
 
tazmily menace said:
i'm sorry
there's no hope for me
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I second what VisionofMilotic said. You care for human rights and freedom, and this shows that you are a great person. We do need more people like you in this world.
I am sorry to hear that you feel that way, but please don't give up. There are moments here and there who show there is good in humanity out there, and that means we can have hope. We are friends here, so we are there if you need a friendly ear. You will always be welcome here, Tazmily.
 
you don't understand
none of you understand
i don't wanna live in a world where i have "your body my choice" shouted at me no matter where i go
i can't take it anymorei cant i ccant
 
tazmily menace said:
you don't understand
none of you understand
i don't wanna live in a world where i have "your body my choice" shouted at me no matter where i go
i can't take it anymorei cant i ccant
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There are still places in the world even in the US that you can go without that happening. It doesn't matter who's in charge, there are plenty of people who will never do that to others. Expecting everyone to treat you with no respect at all isn't fair to yourself or them.
I hope that's just a fear of yours and not something you have to put up with every day, cause that '''''slogan''''' is f'''ing disgusting.
 
Bigots feel brave enough to say that disgusting phrase only when they can hide behind their precious keyboards.
In real life, however, someone who tries to utter that phrase is going to get a well-deserved beatdown.
For example: it brings me peace knowing that the person who first uttered that phrase can no longer show his face in public and has to watch his back in prison.
 
tazmily menace said:
you don't understand
none of you understand
i don't wanna live in a world where i have "your body my choice" shouted at me no matter where i go
i can't take it anymorei cant i ccant
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Moderator hat on here: please remember these people are just trying to help and at least some do in fact understand the situation you are in, so please do not be taking it out on people by saying they don't.

This isn't to say please stop posting at all or anything the whole point of this club is to try and help (as best as we can we're just a Pokémon forum after all and not equipped in any capacity to properly deal with things like this, a reminder for everyone!), just try to remember no one is out to get you out anything here. It is supposed to be a safe space!

I'd advise seeking some form of professional help or at least looking at available hotlines etc ASAP, and also try to remember that it isn't going to say least an immediate you cannot do literally anything moment, it would be worth trying to do some proper research on the situation at hand.
 
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tazmily menace said:
do you want me to delete my account
joining pokeforums was a goddamn mistake if so
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Hi @tazmily menace , you don't know me but I wanted to share the following insights with you (maybe they're wrong, or perhaps I am naive):

1. You are loved and special. There will never be another @tazmily menace in this world, so we appreciate you for being here with us.
2. Hard times are not eternal; it is often darkest before dawn!.
3. As with all things of the mind, make sure that you are resting, hydrating and eating before thinking of doing anything else.

Don't give up, trainer!

♥️:ogerpon-hearthflame:♥️
 
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