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APPEARANCE: She looks like a regular Salazzle. In order for her to stand out from her peers, she often likes to dress up in styles and fashions she considers to be trend-setting or unique. She is always sporting a wig. Today for service, she's wearing her hair in dreadlocks styled like a pompadour, and a fur-lined bomber jacket. Her required uniform tie is done up as a bow on her head.
MOVESET:
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Toxic -In the form of a loogie. Daiquiri has a habit of spitting a viscous glob of highly poisonous phlegm that will fizzle and dissolve into a surface. They say treat your server well or they may spit in your food.
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Double Slap
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Encore - Sometimes hype is infectious. Can take the form of incessant congratulatory flattery or a more subtle validation in another Pokemon in order to convince the recipient to do a certain task - of her or another's proposal. It can certainly be resisted or ignored, but everyone likes to hear even a little kudos.
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Flamethrower - A blazing stream of fire that erupts from the mouth, but as it's just a stronger fire attack to Ember, it's intensity can be metered down just as lowly into a smolder. Daiquiri has excellent control over the attack, as it's all in her breathing technique.
BACKGROUND:
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Dikeledi is a young adult, her physiological standpoint could be considered the equivalent of a human between the ages of 18 and 22. She lived in Oku Nnu - the name of the community as read by its sole, dilapidated town sign, with those the only letters not weathered away. Oku Nnu was once a wide-spanning human town, abandoned a great yet unknown number of years ago until a settler party of Pokemon reclaimed it. The town sits on the edge of desert and scrubland, several days west of the coast. This area is a calderic depression that sits atop a deep and roiling magma chamber, whose vents still leak and bubble in lava lakes near town. A river from the sea flows in some number of days north of town and spills into lakes of its own, but during the dry season, those evaporate into large deposits of salt. Oku Nnu's new residents have picked up the business of mining and trading their slabs of salt with neighboring towns of pioneer Pokemon. Yet unlike its neighbors, Oku Nnu is unique in that it has an extensive subterranean complex of cellars and passageways, making the maze below a dark town in and of itself.
The Desert, The Dragon, and The Egg
Spoiler:
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Dikeledi was born to her mother Nyaqa and her father, Vortiger, a shiny Garchomp. Dikeledi has never known Nyaqa beyond what little her father has shared, but when he was younger, Vortiger hailed from the coastal mountains northeast of the river in a city-state of dragons. He ran away from both his father and the mandate the sovereign put on their able-bodied to prepare for an ensuing battle with a hostile draconic principality at sea. After weeks of travel into more arid lands, he came across Oku Nnu one freezing night. Though he originally had no intention to stay more than a few nights by its outskirts, he chanced across a Salazzle, who slipped out the window of a small cob house in his view - unbeknownst to Vortiger where her harem of Salandit lay. After she saw her leave witnessed, she introduced herself as Nyaqa, and commented on how foreign his species were to the town. Speaking in confidence to her of his situation as they walked quickly turned into his unwitting seduction, and later, a night of consequence. Nyaqa the morning after convinced Vortiger not be seen around town, implying the residents would ostracize him for his otherness. The two continued to see each other in secret at night on the outskirts, with Nyaqa giving him food and resources in exchange for emotional favors. Some many encounters in, Nyaqa did not know she was with Egg until it was time to deliver. After three months of the affair, Vortiger woke up to his makeshift hut on the edge of town, vandalized. Left in the wake of broken mud brick, splintered shrubwood, and an army of tracks like a lizard's was an Egg with a note that insisted "You are filth."
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Despite storming into town with the Egg and demanding the people tell him where the Salazzle named Nyaqa lived, the townspeople said they have never heard of that name nor seen a Salazzle "up here." The house he then pointed to, from the night he first met her, was unoccupied - which the townspeople claimed was always the case. Concerned for this foreigner's sudden appearance and aggressive behavior while carrying an Egg, the denizens lent him the unoccupied house to stay in for a couple days until he had his situation sorted. In those next few days, Vortiger meets Oku Nnu's guardian Golurk named Talmud who grants him executive permission to dwell as a resident, discovers through a hidden hatch in the house the town's subterranean maze of locked and secretive residencies, and learns that the underground has its own governance that works in cooperation with Talmud's.
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In the following years, the Egg hatched into a young Salandit, who Vortiger named "Dikeledi" - in the fashion of Oku Nnu's culture, one he had grown to tolerate. He had taken time to explore the town beneath and its less scrupulous practices its rumored golden guardian let be. He began to work mining salts for a job, but though it was the town's main source of income, it was a popular job and his compensation was paltry. He would catch wind of the monthly casualties brought about by the waging mountain-sea dragon war he had fled from the northeast. He decided to investigate the underground, only to get caught up in its more lucrative yet suspicious affairs. All the while, he was raising his only daughter, trying to teach her the nights he chose to be home early how to be a decent young woman - and to stay away from the underground. When she hit the teen years, of course, her natural curiosity grew as she decided to take risks and explore on her own.
The Underground
Spoiler:
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Dikeledi was heavily influenced by the underground culture. Wandering the maze alone, she would stumble across vaults with gambling activities and black market trade. She had been attacked a few times as well, jumped by thieves and smugglers in the corridors whom she had to fend off and flee. Despite these moments, she would return time and again to explore. One night, she came across a Cacturne and Maractus pair around her age, down in a hidden and primitive Gym-like arena. They offered her some reprise and mischief under the guise of guidance and friendship.
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During this time, Dikeledi with Samman the Cacturne and Dalia the Maractus would eavesdrop on dealings in the underground. They learned about other Pokemon towns beyond Oku Nuu, towns that have been struggling to get a grasp on technology, and towns that already have departmentalized their government to control promising industry. They heard about voluntary Water-type services to an exotic island off the coast. They heard about beds of mystical rainbow-colored rock that were being guarded in the mountains. They heard about buildings made of tall steel, ropes of lightning, blazing fires, deals and offices. And when goods were sold and bidders left their secret spaces and a few discarded baubles behind, the Salandit and her friends would sneak in and take what they could, and marvel.
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Dikeledi would hide her spoils in her room, under her dusty and tattered quilted mattress. She had two magazines whose dates of issue had no value in the years of Pokemon, though what the models wore were of distinctly different styles. The models on the front were of what she assumed to be Pokemon, though their basic figures were diverse in shape and color. One magazine was full of what they self-referenced as "urban", "street", and at times even "sporty" garments, which focused heavily on the importance of "designer" and "brand name", with "cliques" of these figures posed self-assuredly and provocatively around busy metal constructs. Some things were tight and revealing, others sagged below the waist. Music and booming devices for it were heavily advertised. The other magazine had bright colors, flouncing frills with lace or squarely geometric cuts, with little charms and accessories abounding. It was "pop", it was "alternative", it was "quirky" and endorsed by "idols" who "did it first". It was all conceptualized and "artistic" and teetered on the line of practicality and stage show, and backdrops were like bizarre dreamscapes.
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While Dikeledi learned to read through the magazines and pronounce many words as she thought correct, she also had treasured another pilfered find - one that was small and rectangular, but in pressing one of its buttons, something inside it began to spin and words came out. It was the slurred, aggressive voice of a woman venting her social troubles, using turns of phrases Dikeledi never heard of before, but quickly adopted. She would listen to it whenever she wanted a good laugh or to hear how the woman handled a similar issue that the Salandit felt she couldn't bring to her busy and distant father. The woman on the recorder often spoke about her favorite drink: a frozen strawberry daiquiri. The word "daiquiri" sounded glamorous and modern to her, and so she adapted it as her "new" name with her friends.
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When Daiquiri evolved from her battles with Samman, Dalia, and other mishaps, it created a palpable tension in the household with her father. From there, it was further strained. When the teen Salazzle and her friends were discovered by a group of money-peddling dealers in a deep part of the underground, they had no chance as they were quickly overtaken, captured, terribly beaten, and held captive for interrogation. Told to stay there as one of the Pokemon went to fetch their leader to see what would become of them for eavesdropping, the goon returned with a shiny Mega Garchomp - with a round rainbow gem pinned to his white cravat. The Salazzle immediately recognized the color and voice as Vortiger, though she didn't understand his form. Vortiger, completely appalled to find his daughter bound and battered, shut down operations for the night in a blind and unbridled rage.
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The next few days, Vortiger stayed home and silently nursed Daiquiri back to health. For a long time after, he refused to explain to her why he involved himself in dodgy ventures, as if it were the only other avenue in the dust bowl town to make a living. He also refused to speak on his mysterious new form and the strange garment he wore during. Daiquiri was not allowed out, nor was she allowed visits by her only other two friends during her recuperation. Communication absolutely crumbled for that time, leaving Daiquiri bitter towards her father, and ever-yearning for the colorful and urbanite worlds she'd flip through nightly when the dragon was sleeping. When Vortiger finally decided to address the incident that put them in that situation, he only said, "What I do feeds you. The rest is my business. Don't ever make it yours."
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Despite Vortiger's indiscriminate rampage on his band of partners for his daughter's unfortunate placement at the time, his humble standing in the underground did not diminish. Instead, it grew - out of remorse of their severe actions and fear of his draconic wrath. When Vortiger was able to return to his base of operations, a fellow sales advisor gathered him in private to talk with a visiting merchant. This secretive visitor proposed a business opportunity that arose with the introduction of new prospects and other speculations in a growing Pokemon-run industry, sourced in a faraway town. After a series of meetings and consideration, Vortiger was unsure if the risks he'd take in uprooting his life to travel weeks on end to start afresh for a high-risk market was worth it. He spent late nights when his daughter was assuredly asleep to walk the freezing outskirts of town and ruminate on his choices. then one early morning, he came across something shambling to town.
The Journey
Spoiler:
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Upon recognizing the gold-plated armor, chipped scythe-like tusks, and grand insignia carried on their tattered flag, the shiny Garchomp made no haste returning back to town before he could be seen. That morning there was a commotion outside as the residents crowded around a collapsed trio of Haxorus, and the heavy footsteps of the titanic Golurk rattled houses as it shuffled through to officiate. Watching from the window, Vortiger knew they were soldiers of the dragon sovereign in the mountains, his home that he fled from many years ago. Their war was still raging, and the three were sent out from their Kommo-o commander as messengers to recruit for aid from the nearest town, as their resources for rations were depleting. For their condition, the three Haxorus would be kept in town for some days while they were fed and tended. Vortiger could not chance being seen by them, as they would surely recognize the pink dragon as a wartime defector, one of the most grave offenses of his city-state. Hiding away until the night, Vortiger returned to the underground, where he finally agreed to the arrangements with his men to set off for the fabled steel city in the distance.
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After two days of hiding until everything was properly set, Vortiger woke Daiquiri up at twilight, telling her to gather her things as he urgently pressed that they needed to leave. A covered wagon waited for them on the edge of Oku Nuu, and without even giving her a chance to say goodbye to her only friends, Vortiger rushed her out of town to board the wagon. Surrounded by the same ring of Pokemon who captured and assaulted her two weeks before, Daiquiri was forced to keep her tongue in their cloaked and abated presence for four more weeks, as they traveled through arid lands before reaching moor and meadow, following an antique map toward a road now in complete disuse. Vortiger and his able-bodied cohorts all took turns in pairs to pull the cart along their rough and arduous journey toward the steel city. Daiquiri's only promises along the way were by the band, saying that she would have a better, more glamorous life in this city, and that her father was going to strike it rich with them. She did not hear her father speak any reassurance to her though. All he said was that it was for her "own good."
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After the long trek, battles with territorial nomads along the way, and the abandonment of two party members whose faith began to waiver, the group finally arrived to the illustrious Pokemon city. Vortiger and Daiquiri were told that they already had accommodations arranged for their arrival, as the Garchomp's crew had planted a few from their own network a year ago to scout out the city's prospects. They abandoned their wagon to the side, took their bundles of belongings, and sneaked into the city in their dark garb. Led along the way by the merchant who proposed the journey in the first place, they slipped through alleys and avoided nighttime patrolmen to find a certain cellar door, secretly marked for their safety. After the merchant guide unlocked it with a special key he kept on his person, the bunch filed in. This well-furnished basement to a townhouse was one of three leased to members of their organization. The rented houses were all under their control. This was Vortiger and Daiquiri's new home.
The City Life
Spoiler:
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Daiquiri marveled at the city the night they scuttled through. Allowed to roam the bustling streets alone by day while her father's associates straightened matters, her awe grew as she took in the sights. The city had an aesthetic she had never been exposed to in her magazines, nor hinted to in the ramblings of her cassette player. It was urban and constructed but it lacked an edgy grit and made up for it in inventive complexity. It was colorful and bulky but nothing so prismatic or unconventionally organic in form. The residents dressed in a more modern fashion than back home, but cuts and patterns were plain compared to the few she'd read. She spent her time exploring this new culture through their boutiques, and overhearing snippets of lingo from passersby as she loitered around cafes.
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Upon returning home in the evening, she'd be asked by her father to keep upstairs to her bedroom as he and his cohorts discussed matters. The details of their operation were soon laid out and agreed upon by the Garchomp, wherein he would become a co-owner and essential decision-maker for a lowkey scheme. A week after arriving in the city, Vortiger by night was out in another district, running another rented apartment space, acting as a host to an underground gambling ring. Over time, his group's efforts expanded, and it only brought with it comfortable earnings and secretive alliances. Vortiger would return to his apartment in a dark cloak, key to the cellar door and his mysterious rainbow gem in claw. At the beginning of every week after that success, he would give Daiquiri a hefty allowance, telling her not to spend it all on "the wrong things." Daiquiri would spend a good amount of time and money on a small wardrobe, wanting to craft her image now that she no longer lived in a dust bowl.
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Daiquiri made relationships in her first month living in the city. One night when she was out skulking the alleyways for an interesting scene, she heard a commotion from a nearby dead end. Peeking her head around to investigate, she saw a Tsareena stumbling out of a back door, a cloud of black soot trailing behind her. The Grass-type Pokemon quickly regained her stance, letting loose a barrage of kicks as a raid of dark-furred Meowth pounced at her through the doorway. As her attacks connected and most of them were flung back, there were just too many slipping through for her one to take. When she had the chance, the Tsareena dashed off towards the mouth of the alley - but not before her foot got caught in a small pothole, tripping her. As the mob of Meowth scuttled out, Daiquiri decided to intervene, dashing in with her mouth ablaze with flames to spit. Having forced the Meowth back into their building and retreat at the sight of her Flamethrower, Daiquiri went to help the Tsareena, who introduced herself as "Queenie".
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When the Salazzle returned the greet, Queenie remarked on her strange accent. As the two walked out of the alley, Daiquiri took the time to explain where she grew up to a curious Tsareena before the sudden move to this city. Queenie made it a point to take Daiquiri up under her wing as thanks for the help. The two became fast friends as Queenie showed Daiquiri around the districts most evenings and introduced her to the thrill of gatecrashing. Daiquiri began to grow accustomed to the different scenes of the city, as she began to mold a new identity for herself from all these different influences, down to the new nuances in her inflection.
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One month later, when Queenie and Daiquiri were out looking for signs of party life in a district across town, they found just that in an abandoned townhouse. They trespassed onto the fenced-in property and followed the grainy sound of a rockabilly record into the back of the house, where boards had been pried away as a makeshift entrance. Sneaking in, they found the living area was packed with Salandit, all lounging in short black jackets. Though the Tsareena and Salazzle were immediately discovered and swarmed, most of the Salandit expressed a blatant interest in Daiquiri, asking her why she was here and admiring the few pieces of fashion she sported. Queenie, calling the party a total dud, encouraged Daiquiri to leave with her. Despite enjoying all the attention she was receiving and the protests of the Salandit, she ended up walking out - as some of the Salandit followed. After a threatening outburst from Queenie to keep away, they mostly staved off, though one Salandit didn't. He wore a bulkier jacket with a red patch on one arm, and he stood a little taller than the rest. Introducing himself as Quavious, he apologized for the way his crew acted, but said that though they crashed his gang's hideout, he invited them to come again for parties and "more." Though Daiquiri didn't accept the offer at first because Queenie wanted to leave so badly, the Salazzle did make it a point some nights to visit the house on her own. She was gladly welcomed in by their leader Quavious, learned their ways and picked up their slang, and over time grew an attachment to the gang as they treated her better than family. Quavious in particular became a love interest, as they bonded over private exploits into the night. She's kept the gang and Quavious a secret from her father.
The Workforce
Spoiler:
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As Vortiger's illegal gambling business paid for their apartment's rent, utilities, and more, pocket change began to dwindle for Daiquiri as her father began to start various investment plans and trading. Vortiger insisted that Daiquiri get a job to compensate her shrinking allowance and to support her shopping and dining habits. Begrudgingly, she did, and her first job was at a maternity boutique run by a Miltank named Milkie. After only a month on the job and an incident that Daiquiri in-part instigated, she quit, feeling unappreciated. Telling her father her decision devolved into an argument and a demand she find another job or risk being kicked out of the house. Finding the threat unfounded and unfair but needing the money she used to earn, she went job searching.
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She finally came across Finer Things, a fine-dining restaurant that was hiring for server position. She took an application home, showed her father when he was available, and said she would apply there as a start. Vortiger recognized the status of the restaurant. After silently recalling some important details, he decided to help her prepare by teaching her a few things about table sets and etiquette - albeit, as he was taught back in his home court. When it was time to show the restaurant's powers that be a demonstration for the position, most of what she was taught translated over - but she did raise a few eyebrows and evoke a few reactions during the performance and interview. Though it appeared she was mixly reviewed when she left, she was called back a week later with the job. Now Daiquiri has only been working there for a week, but she feels that she could make the situation work.
PROMPT:
Spoiler:
MILKIE
ITS YA GIRL, GET MIXED. YOU THINK YOU ALL THAT BUT YOU A CLOWN. I AM SO DONE WITH THAT FAT PINK HEIFER-LOOKIN MUG AND THAT BABY MAMA BUISNESS YOU TRYNA OPERATE. YALL NEVER DID THE HOMEWORK, SO I GON BREAK IT DOWN FOR YOU SINCE THEM FOUR STOMACHS CAN'T.
I WAS AT THE BREAKFAST CLUB MONDAY FOR MY GRILL CHEESE THE DAY YOU CALLED OUT WORK AND I SAW THAT TWO FACE BUST LIP MEDICHIMP ((HENCEFORTH CALLED DIRTY DENISE) ROLL UP WITH JASMINE AND TONYA. THEY NEVER SAW ME, THEY SAT DOWN TO KIKI W/ TEA. OF COURSE AFTER THE WHOLE FACT JAS AND TONYA NEVER CAME TO ME ABOUT NOTHIN BECAUSE WHY WOULD THEY WHEN ITS NONE OF MY BUSINESS WHAT DIRTY DENISE SAID BEFORE WORK, BUT I WASN'T INVITED WITH THEM OTHER EMPLOYEES??
NO. ITS NO DAMN SURPRISE THAT DIRTY DENISE DON'T LIKE ME CUS I WAS NEVER AFRAID TO SNIP A WITCH WHEN SHE COME AFTER ME OVER NOTHING. AND YOU TURN THAT BIG FLAPPY CHEEK EVERY TIME, BUT YALL GOT NO REASON, THIS IS A MUKING MATERNITY STORE.
ANYWAY, I MIND MY OWN BUSINESS BUT THEN I LOOKED OVER AND I SAW DIRTY DENISE SHOW OFF SOME KINDA PAPER TO THEM. GUESS WHAT COLOR IT WAS. CHARTREUSE. SAME PUKE NASTY COLOR OF THE SCHEDULE CHART. DIRTY DENISE COPPED A COPY AND WAS SHOWIN' IT OFF. I DIDN'T THINK NOTHIN OF IT TILL THURSDAY…..
….. WHICH WAS MY DAY OFF. I WAS BUMPIN WITH MY BOY QUAVIOUS. WE WAS DROPPIN BILLS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF TOWN BUT LITTLE DID I KNOW THAT YOU WERE "OUT OF TOWN" AGAIN ((YOU DIDN'T CALL ME THIS TIME, HMMM NOT SUSPICIOUS, YOU ALWAYS CALL EVEN WHEN I'M OFF)) AND APPARENTLY DUSTY DIRTY DENISE AND THE REST OF THEM WASHED UP RUNG OUT BIDDIES WERE RUNNIN THE STORE. GOLLY, LUCKY ME, I REMEMBERED THAT I DONE LEFT ONE OF MY REAL HAIR BACK IN MY LOCKER AND I NEEDED IT FOR THE LATE NITE JAM, CUT A RUG RITE, SO I WENT BACK TO THE BABY BLIMP SHACK AND LO AND BEHOLD, I FIND OUT WHEN I WAS GONE SOME KINDA REAL SHIZZ WENT DOWN.
I WALKED IN, TONYA WAS AT THE DESK, I PASS HER BYE, MY GOODS IN THE BACK, I OPEN THE DOOR, I WALK RIGHT INTO DIRTY DENISE TALKIN UP A MESS ABOUT ME TO JASMINE. I HEARD HER, SHE CALL ME A "TOXIC", AND THEN SHE BROUGHT "LOOKS" INTO IT?? SAYIN' I DON'T FIT THE STORE, LIKE. GEE WILLIKERS, THIS BUST UP HAM HOCK LEG LOOKIN. I TOLD HER GET MY NAME OUT THEY STANK MOUTH. IF SHE TRYNA COME FOR ME SHE BETTER STEP HER RED SWOLE THIGHS UP TO ME FIRST. THEN JASMINE SAID SOMETHIN NOBODY LISTENED TO BECAUSE MUK HER, SHE A SECOND THOT.
THEN DIRTY DENISE SAID I'M SOME KINDA RATCHET AND I HAD A BAD ATTITUDE AND MY HAIR FAKE AND I NEED SOMEONE TO PUT ME IN MY PLACE?? LIKE FO REAL? SO I SAID TRY ME AND SHE BUCKED AT ME LIKE SHE WAS BOUTA THROW ONE SO I SLAPPED HER DEAF DUMB.
BUT IT WADN'T FOR LONG CUS THEN WE REALLY BUCK WHILIN AND JAS HAD TO STEP IN THAT OLD CLUCKOO AND WE SCRAPPED OUT INTO THE STORE BUSTING IT UP AND TONYA LEFT THE DESK TO HOBBLE OUT THE DOOR SAYING HELP HELP I WAS STARTIN SHIZZ, LIKE REALLY SHE WASN'T EVEN THERE FOR THE START OF IT HAHAHAHA
AND THATS WHEN QUAVIOUS HEARD WHATS UP AND HE BOLD IN AND WE WAS LUNCHIN, GOT THE WHOLE STORE TRASHED.
BUT CLEARLY IT WAS A MUCH NEEDED MAKEOVER BECAUSE YOU UP AND SIDED TO DIRTY DEAF DUMB DENISE AND THE GOONIES BEFORE YOU HEARD MY SIDE OF THE STORY AND MY BOY QUA-QUA ((HIS MAMA LEARNED HIM NEVER TELL A LIE (((DIRTY D'S MAMA DIDN'T GET THE MEMO??) )). I WAS INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY AND YALL GOT OFF SOME KANGAROO BULL, BUT THATS OK. YALL TREAT ME LIKE I'M STREET, I WILL BRING THE STREET TO YOU HUNTIES.
THAT'S WHY DENISE BROKE THE WHOLE DAMN COUNTER WITH A WHIFFED BOP AIM FOR ME. THAT'S WHY DENISE CRASH INTO FIVE SHELVES CUS SHE TRIP ON MY TAIL TRYNA SNATCH MY (REAL!!) HAIR. THAT'S WHY DENISE'S ALIEN STALK LOOKIN HEAD BUST THOSE PICTURE FRAMES FOR WHEN THE BABY COMES THAT YALL SELLIN FOR 20 MORE THAN THE DEPOT STORE. I MAY HAVE BURNED UP SOME CLOTHES CUS SHE GOT MY MOUTH HOT SPITTIN FIRE, BUT REALLY THATS ALL I DID ((NOT MUCH!!!) AND I ALREADY PAID FOR THE DAMAGES EVEN THOUGH THEM CLOTHES ARE CUT OUT OF POLKADOT CIRCUS CURTAINS, YOU DUMB FAT TRICK.
I AINT TRYNA STICK AROUN SO YALL CAN CALL ME A THEIF WHEN YALL GET ROBBED DOWN THE ROAD ((IF YOU REBUILD RIGHT)) BUT WHAT YALL DID TO MY REP AINT GONNA FLY, SO DON'T BE SURPRISED IF MY LIZZAS WILL BE SEEING YOU. IM BOSS AND BOUJEE, THE FATTEST CAT (NOT AS FAT AS YOU THO, UH YAYA)
P.S. COVER YOUR UDDERS WITH SOME PASTIES OR BETTER YET DUCT TAPE
KISS KISS ITS QUI-QUI
You're really thorough when it comes to backstory! Like wow.
I found the prompt much harder to read than the backstory, however. The prompt had a surprising number of spelling errors while your backstory only had one, so I have to wonder if that was intentional, "in-character" as it were. I don't know how to ask that politely, I admit.
Secondly, the prompt was so thick with slang terms I've never heard before, that is was difficult to infer from context what was being said. (It's easier to infer from context when the unfamiliar slang is used a bit more sparingly.) But that was just my experience and I can't speak for the others here.
Perhaps most importantly, given Daiquiri's mannerisms, her character, I have a really severe doubt that she would pass the hiring process for a fine-dining establishment. I just can't see that happening, myself. (And it wasn't addressed in your profile, how she managed to swing landing that job, just that she "applied for and was hired to Finer Things.")
P.S. Where does the last nickname "Qui-Qui" come from?
You're really thorough when it comes to backstory! Like wow.
I found the prompt much harder to read than the backstory, however. The prompt had a surprising number of spelling errors while your backstory only had one, so I have to wonder if that was intentional, "in-character" as it were. I don't know how to ask that politely, I admit.
Secondly, the prompt was so thick with slang terms I've never heard before, that is was difficult to infer from context what was being said. (It's easier to infer from context when the unfamiliar slang is used a bit more sparingly.) But that was just my experience and I can't speak for the others here.
Also, in regards to your moveset:
Perhaps most importantly, given Daiquiri's mannerisms, her character, I have a really severe doubt that she would pass the hiring process for a fine-dining establishment. I just can't see that happening, myself. (And it wasn't addressed in your profile, how she managed to swing landing that job, just that she "applied for and was hired to Finer Things.")
P.S. Where does the last nickname "Qui-Qui" come from?
That's the point. The prompt is her letter to her former employer. She talks slang because this way of speaking is what she's picked up from all the influences I've elaborated on in her history. I'm sorry if you don't understand a number of it, but I'm using a mix of modern terms used in the hip-hop culture, and 50's suburbanite/greaser chit-chat (admittedly, more of the former than the latter in the prompt, but I intend to even it out if I get accepted).
Qui-Qui is not her last name. I didn't give her a last name since I didn't read that it was required. Her given name is Dikeledi, but the name she refers to herself as is "Daiquiri", and "Qui-Qui" is a nickname of that.
As for your doubt, I don't know what to tell you, lol. Including what she's mentioned in her written parting shot, the only really reprehensible things I've expressed of her is that she enjoys a good brawl, and is willing to get into a fight over it. In a work environment, if it isn't directed at her, she will tend to "mind her own business" to whatever degree, but if something interests her, she may sleuth like she does in her nightlife. The threat of her father kicking her out to the street and losing a source of income is incentive enough to have her reigned in with this second attempt to keep a job. I've otherwise not really gone into detail about her actual mannerisms in the presence of different types of people, and I don't intend to, tbh. I'd add a Personality section to the app for that if I thought I wanted to describe how multi-faceted and nuanced this and that was, which wasn't really the point of my prompt or the method of her backstory.
I don't see how I'm supposed to write the hiring process for my girl through the GM's characters, so I'll let Kiyo intervene with his comments.
Edit: I totally glazed over that the moves are to be described, oopsie. I'll edit my app.
James Cadbury. In butler fashion, he's called by his surname, and his first name is generally never mentioned unless he must state his full name, or it's an intimate situation where he's on a first-name basis.
Surnames are an uncommon thing in this world, but James has one. His father, Cassius Cadbury, was also in the business, as was his father and so on. James shares this classy "family name" to connect him with this family's history of great service.
𝖎𝖎 ∭ 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
Cadbury is a Linoone who has been trained to stand biped, putting him at 3'3". As all Linoone, his half-lidded eyes are entirely blue except for his slit pupils, and brown stripes mark his creamy-furred body, most notably one stripe atop his head that forms an arrow.
He wears a little necktie, bordered by a short waiter's jacket over a white dress shirt. (Usually they are red and blue respectively, but Finer Things has requested a different colour to suit their theme.)
Nothing at all covers his lower body, but no matter. His large white claws have been filed down to a harmless blunt tip. His tail is held up in a shape similar to a squirrel's, and a comb tucked in his pocket ensures his fur is kept well-groomed at any time. James was lucky to have inherited very silky fur from the genes of his father, a rather rare male of the Cinccino species.
𝖎𝖎𝖎 ∭ 𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐨𝐢𝐫𝐞
Switcheroo.
Useful for quickly getting a replacement dish out to someone, or a second order. In a pinch, it may be needed for a stealthy, unscrupulous deed. When done right, this switch of objects can go entirely unnoticed.
Helping Hand.
Used quite literally toward both fellow staff and toward customers. When Cadbury lends a paw in aiding others, efficiency is increased twofold. Simply put, he is a naturally helpful person.
Odor Sleuth.
Checking the dish for everything that needs to be there before it hits the table. Sniffing out clues in other situations. Linoone are one of those species good at finding things with their sense of smell.
Charm.
A sophisticated charisma is used to win over others. It can be used in conversation, in a simple glance, in his posture, or in exceptional presentation when a dish arrives. It's also handy in case he needs to excuse himself out of a mistake he's made.
Yes, this moveset makes Cadbury utterly unable to fight, but that is entirely within his character. He would never use violence, not with his refined demeanour, and he's certainly never had a lick of practice. Expect fancy-boy to get floored if it comes to that.
𝖎𝖛 ∭ 𝐔𝐩𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠
James was raised as a young Zigzagoon footman, and as he showed promise, he was groomed for a higher position. He was trained to stand upright, and raised to be polite, respectful, genteel, and serving. His father, Cassius Cadbury, insisted upon this training to stand biped, so James could easily perform duties with his forepaws. Not to mention the much more civilized appearance it lends.
Cassius also insisted young James keep his fur exceptionally groomed at all times. James was lucky to have inherited the same silky fur as his father, and Cassius was not about to let such fine fur go to waste with a disheveled appearance.
These lifestyle choices and this training stuck with Cadbury as he grew. He found his duties as a footman rewarding, and as he matured and gained experience, he became a butler, serving the wealthy and occasionally the famous.
Helping them enjoy themselves through his service is what he lives for.
But why might that be? Why would he adopt such an enjoyment for serving others?
Certainly the way his father raised him and the training he received from his tutor were both very significant factors, but there is perhaps something more there, something he would be harder pressed to put into words if he was asked. Maybe it's the feeling of being included in important settings, the idea of having a role there: not everyone gets to be in the sitting room where moneylenders and financial titans decide the fate of the economy, but he gets to be an active observer, even participant, as his master's trusted advisor. Maybe he likes it because his intelligence, diligence, and technique get appreciated by someone undeniably more important than he is: he can work his way into someone's heart so deeply that their autobiography is dedicated to him.
As recently as a year ago, Cadbury found himself between masters in his butler career, and took notice of a particularly fashionable Bar and Bistro that was just opening its doors. Cadbury had himself a look about the place on what just happened to be its opening day. My, what celebration there was to be had! And the joint was so sophisticated, yet without feeling stiff. Cadbury enjoyed himself thoroughly, and by mid-evening, he'd already made plans to become a regular customer.
That's when he realized they were hiring, and he knew. He knew becoming a server at a place like this would be every bit as fulfilling as working as a butler.
𝖛 ∭ 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐦𝐚
Cadbury has impeccable manners, enjoys serving others, and lets his kind heart show through his prim and proper demeanour.
The Linoone speaks formally, and appears to be in his 30s or 40s. He is very refined and genteel, but he's likely to fluster under the right kind of… unprofessionalism. He is by-the-book, comfortable only with the proper procedure, both that his employer has set, and that he considers part of his own lifestyle.
He is fastidious in maintaining a neat-and-tidy appearance, both in himself and his workplace. He is, however, not below delegation of such tasks to others when need be, given how often his job involved equal parts his own labour, and organization of maids and footmen.
What matters most in the butler's rules of conduct are personal presentation and attitude. You must always remember that your dress and demeanour say everything about your employers and their household (or bistro, in this case). You must stand up straight and you must always be smartly turned out. A good attitude means adopting a "no job too small" mentality. Good manners and total discretion are paramount.
Cadbury adopts the words of his father: "I have dedicated my life to the pursuit of excellent service. I feel strongly that the best service can be a bridge between cultures and lifestyles, and that good service makes the difference between clients feeling comfortable or ill at ease."
He also takes to heart the words of his tutor: "Many people feel that having proper manners means being stuffy and pretentious, but I'm here to tell you that nothing could be further from the truth! You can be well-mannered, cultured, and a great home entertainer while being yourself -- in fact, there's no other way to be. For me, etiquette is not a set of classist rules of or rich, famous, or snobby people -- rather, it's a way of being, based on understanding other people and having consideration for their needs."
𝖛𝖎 ∭ 𝐈𝐝𝐢𝐨𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐬
While Cadbury adopts the above mantra himself, he is not flawless, and can indeed come off as stuffy at times. It is not something he has come to terms with yet. It can be easy to forget his tutor's wisdom in some scenarios. At times, he's around some rich or famous people who are snobby themselves, and he becomes a mirror, adopting their mannerisms subconsciously to fit into the group, to be accepted. At other times, he's around people who are much less cultured than he is, and he comes off snobby in comparison, with all his drilled-in rules of etiquette. Prime example: If you know certain rules of etiquette but someone does not, it is rude and inappropriate to advise them and make them feel uncomfortable. But Cadbury probably does this anyway. Because how else are they going to learn, right??
Cadbury's rules of conduct for himself are a result of things passed down through generations and tradition, which is why many of them may be a little outdated. For example: "Followers are strictly forbidden, and any servant found fraternizing with a member of the opposite sex will be dismissed without a hearing." Nowadays, romantic fraternizing among his kind is more common, though still taboo enough to be kept secret. And even the uninitiated can spot the loophole of gender in this old-fashioned rule.
Since he is "between masters" at this time (a polite way of saying that he can't find any masters with a spot available), Cadbury is likely to frame Finer Things as similar to a master in his mind. A master who has lots and lots of guests over to entertain and serve! Which is, again, a polite way of saying he may be leaning on Finer Things as a surrogate. So he projects his strict code of rules and etiquette onto the bistro's wait staff and the bistro's guests even though they just want another glass of wine, thanks.
He would also try to make his co-workers, the other servers, live up to his standards too. Standards which "should be the norm" for all servers in fine dining. But of course, this could be a fool's errand with some of them.
The Linoone is rigidly accurate, demanding strict attention to rules and procedures. He becomes displeased with anything that is not perfect or does not meet extremely high standards.
Cadbury is so built for one job, that he's treating the job he currently has as the job he is familiar with, the one he wants to have and is "supposed" to be living. He is self-resentful of the fact that he's a glorified waiter in a glorified restaurant, instead of managing a mansion by now, as he truly should be.
The Cadburies are known for generations of great service, so there is an idealized role to fill by the time it has hit James' shoulders. As the latest in the Cadbury family line, which holds a legacy of highly talented footmen, butlers, stewards, and other roles of service, James has high expectations placed upon him, and high expectations for himself as well. He has set a practically unattainable standard for himself. Any time he slips up (as he would inevitably, he's only mortal), he's falling short of this perfect butler model he ought to live up to. You can imagine how stressful this would be.
So, what is a badger butler to do when he's slipped up, when he has a lapse of propriety, or he's made a blunder that's upset someone? Under good circumstances, he would apologize for his unprofessional behaviour and excuse himself. But if something's driven him to act improperly by making him upset, he may react defensively, explaining why he was justified in doing whatever he did that was tactless or against regulation.
Perhaps his propriety isn't as immaculate as he perceives.
And let's see… some of his soft spots include cheesecake and adorable outfits. He's likely to do best in the cigar room, and would also do fine in the foyer, patio, and dining room. Is there anything else you'd care to know?
Cadbury pulls the cab door shut as he settles into the backseat. No sooner is it closed, the Linoone produces a comb from inside his jacket pocket, and starts to fix his fur. It was a short jog from the building to the cab, but the drizzle outside managed to put a damper in his grooming nonetheless.
"Where ya off to, man?" the cab driver asks, his neck craning over his shoulder to reveal the face of a Gumshoos.
Cadbury looks at him from the backseat, pausing his work with the comb and lifting his brows.
The Gumshoos takes note of how the Linoone is dressed. "Sir," he corrects.
Cadbury's brows drop again, and his comb sets back into motion. "33 Moore, thank you. And if you could not drive too terribly fast, I'd appreciate it."
His comb finds its home back in an inside pocket of his jacket, and from the same pocket, a folded sheet of notebook paper is pulled. Cadbury wants to make sure he got the address correctly. Yes, there it is, just as Carmine wrote it. Cadbury exhales something of a pointed sigh.
The other day, a customer called the bird and asked if "that handsome Linoone from the other day" is single. Cadbury hasn't the foggiest why Carmine chose to divulge such information, but, long story short, this paper details a rather… ludicrous request. Even Carmine recognized it as a silly task to give his server, but he felt that it could only help the reputation of Finer Things with this particular customer, and Cadbury might even have some fun.
Cadbury has a date.
The butler-turned waiter filters out the sounds of the rain, of the traffic that envelopes the taxi cab. He runs his claw along the sheet of paper, absentmindedly chewing the inside of his lip while he ponders. Gently chewing, thankfully.
What is he going to do with this… this markedly unprofessional professional request? Can he even call it a professional request, at this point? His disciples have always said that romantic pursuits and guests must not mix, and in theory, the customers of a bistro are comparable to guests. But here he is with a request from his boss to go date one of them. It's a contradiction of orders and the code of conduct.
What is that bird thinking. This assignment is preposterously over the line. Who I date is part of my personal life. And I am certainly no… no harlot, some worker he can send off to gratify and enchant his customers.
Cadbury forces himself to calm his thoughts. He's being unfair toward his boss: it was not the Trumbeak's idea, it was the customer's. And it's both Carmine's and Cadbury's jobs to make the customers comfortable.
He wishes he'd been given a phone number instead of just a street address. He could call the customer, and make an excuse. Yes, like… he's already seeing someone. Or… he's already married. To his job.
No, no, lying to the customer would be a breach of trust, and that's hardly better than a breach of proper work conduct. He has to go, he can see no other way. He'll just have to give the cust-- his date, a nice evening, treading carefully as he goes. No… romance. Be charming, but not too charming. He mustn't give the impression that he wishes to make this a regular occurrence. That would only further complicate matters.
With a conclusion reached, Cadbury finally notices he's been chewing his lip. He really must stop doing that.
"Ah, did you come straight from work, Cadbury?"
"Oh, no, I simply enjoy this outfit."
The Linoone has appeared in the doorway of his date's abode, dressed in the same short waiter's jacket and little necktie he'd worn at work, both in a deep stromboli green, the latter with a bold black, and a thin white stripe pattern.
"Though I admit my favourite is a blue and red combination. I'm told it matches my eyes," he admits with a smile.
"I'll have to see it sometime! Speaking of, step in for a moment, I was just about to get dressed up myself." Cadbury's semi-blind-date, a Lopunny, encourages the badger inside and onto a couch. "Sorry to make you wait, I'll only be a moment!"
With a brief chuckle, Cadbury leans back, sandwiching his large silky tail between his back and the couch. He has to wonder, does this bunny always get dates this way? Bit of an unusual method. Is the bunny aware of the taboo going on here? Cadbury almost wishes he'd been asked in person, but admittedly he would not have taken the offer in that case, flummoxed by the protocol between server and customer. The rabbit was clever in that regard, more clever than Cadbury had initially given credit, going through his boss like that.
"Ready!" Cadbury turns around at the announcement, looking over the back of the couch to see the Lopunny dressed in a dark suit and red bowtie. With paws set on hips that have jutted to the side, the bunny gives Cadbury a playful look. "How'd I do, up to your standards?"
Cadbury remains in his pose, peering over the back of the couch and frozen, his mouth just slightly open, eyes flicking up and down the Lopunny's form. His ears stand right up.
"Uh, Cadbury?"
He jolts back to attention, ears twitching, freed from his frozen state. "Oh, of course, don't, don't be silly! You look grand."
So that must mean the Lopunny's name is Chris… Not Kris. Did Carmine honestly set him up with… with a man?
Cadbury had suggested a lower-key establishment to dine at tonight, but the Lopunny would have none of it, insisting on going to Cadbury's place of work. Cadbury finds himself embarrassed at the thought of being seen on a gay date by his co-workers and his bosses, but must go along with what Chris wants.
And as expected, the server at the table Cadbury and his gentleman friend are seated, just happens to be a staff member Cadbury works with. The Linoone feels the need to glance away whenever the server smiles at him in that teasing way.
The badger has never been forthcoming about his sexual preferences. This is a hell of a way to come out to his co-workers as, ah, more than heterosexual, let's say.
"Hey now, you're lighting up! What's with the red cheeks?" Chris asks, noticing the hue in Cadbury's face just before his picks up his menu.
"Ah, it's nothing, I…" Cadbury thinks quickly, and finds a way to reply honestly without telling a potentially offense truth. "I'm embarrassed, actually. I work with these fine 'mon daily, and it's a very professional relationship, and… it's embarrassing to have them see me on a date."
Which is true. It's just not the entire reason he's embarrassed.
"Aw! Well, you're cute when you show a little colour, so don't stop for my sake."
Cadbury smiles, shyly but graciously accepting the compliment, and looking down at the table. He even fidgets.
Chris realizes that his date isn't looking at the menu. "Oh, that's right, I guess you know the menu by heart, huh? What're you gonna have, Cadbury, can you make any recommendations?"
"Actually," Cadbury notes, "since this is a date, you may call me James."
"James? Is that your real name?"
"It's my first name. Cadbury is my family name." The badger finds his disposition calming down quickly now that the subject has changed. His blush is fading away.
"Really! I thought your first name was Cadbury! Huh, James Cadbury. Heh, you sound like a butler with a name like that!"
A smile breaks out across the Linoone's muzzle. "Funny you should say that…"
At the end of the date, the badger finds himself back where the date started, in Chris's doorway. The Lopunny thanks Cadbury for the lovely time, and adds, "I was sincerely hoping that… our lovely evening together wouldn't end here. Do you think you might… join me inside?"
Cadbury hesitates. His eyes move away from Chris's, apparently taken with a windowsill flower planter. "Ah, I… Inside? I'm afraid you caught me unprepared, I… I wasn't planning on extending tonight's festivities beyond the bistro."
"Oh, that's no trouble." With an incline of his head, the Lopunny's smile turns just a little more cunning. "I've planned enough for the both of us. I promise it'll be even more fun than the restaurant."
Cadbury's large claws click together in front of his chest. Mental images are already forming in his head, and in turn giving rise to another blush overtop his muzzle. How can he gracefully bow out of this? His gaze returns to Chris, but his head remains turned to the side. "I'm afraid I'm not dressed for anything except a night out…"
"That, we can fix with ease." Chris reaches forward, past those clicking claws. He takes hold of Cadbury's necktie, and pulls the badger gently across the threshold.
The next day, Cadbury comes into work, passing a familiar, beaked face.
"How was your date last night, Cadbury?" Carmine asks, allowing himself a curious smile.
"... More enjoyable than I would care to admit."
((I had a blast writing this. I think I may have gone a tad too long. Haha.))
Cadbury leaned back in his chair, producing a quiet squeak. "Curious lad, aren't you? It's not often I chat with someone so full of questions." With a single claw hooked through a teacup's handle, he paused to take a thoughtful sip, planning his wording carefully.
"Well, first of all, 'showing a great deal of promise' was the word my father used. Not all young footmen take to their job, you understand -- many begrudge their work. I've seen it myself. I remember my peers, fellow footmen and the like, they saw it all as... as chores they were being forced to do by some man with altogether too much money and influence."
Cadbury's shoulder lifted in a one-sided shrug, his expression showing a moment to consider the notion. "And that view isn't wrong, strictly speaking. But I relished the role, personally, even as a boy. It was less about the work I was doing, and more about the act of serving others. Of course, I did the work well, and I was highly polite, and that's what my father meant when he said I showed promise." The butler chuckles. "It doesn't hurt that my father wanted me to become a butler in the long run, in the first place. I suppose he was biased!"
After another sip, he continued along the same line of questioning to explain his studying. "I was tutored, actually. There isn't really a school for this type of thing. I had a tutor who would come to our house, or invite me to his, to teach me etiquette and common chores and tasks, and how to perform them with class and efficiency. This tutor worked closely with my father, and my father was also a good teacher when it came to etiquette."
"It sounds pretty unnatural to stand biped for your species ... does it hurt? Do you ever resent being raised so rigidly by your father? Do/Did you ever yearn for something other than high-class servitude?"
The Linoone broke into a polite laugh. "Oh no no, it doesn't hurt!" His paw batted at the air dismissively. "Here, look at it this way. A Pikachu is perfectly comfortable standing quadruped or biped, yes? And it doesn't hurt him at all. Even quadruped Linoone will frequently rear up on their hind legs; they simply don't walk about that way. I was trained to stand upright -- this was again at the behest of my father -- so I could easily perform my duties with my forepaws. Not to mention it lends an air of, ah... how should I say... sophistication? Civilizedness?"
His eyes glanced away in recollection. "I wouldn't describe my father as rigid. I don't think there's anything to resent. I'm grateful for what he's done for me. I can't imagine my life as some uncivilized…" Instead of finishing his thought, Cadbury's eyes returned to his conversation partner, and he chuckled, catching himself. "Nevermind, let's move on, haha. Mustn't insult anyone."
"I do yearn to be something more someday," he agreed with a single nod. "Own some land of my own, my own butler... Host social parties at a mansion, or even a pleasant cottage if I cannot afford the former. Wouldn't that be a pleasant way to retire?" he asked, his smile spreading across his muzzle.
"Speaking of your father, did you ever get to know your mother? Was she ever in your life? I mean, you at least must be curious, considering you're the same species as her."
"Ah, I was a bit of a daddy's boy, I admit. Mother used to work as a maid, though she's retired now. Fortunately we've never worked under the same master, as I would actually have rank on her." He laughed politely. "Imagine that, hm? A butler telling his mother what to do in the workplace."
He paused, eyes drifting and lingering on a spot on the floor. "When I was young… Mother needed a great deal of my help. Father's, too, but I was actually very involved myself, for a child. She, ah… she's afflicted with Alzheimer's." The Linoone didn't look particularly happy to be talking about this subject, naturally, but he continued. "She required a lot of routine in her life to feel more stable, less stressed by lack of recollection. She needed familiarity. I, as a child, maintained that schedule for her, reminding her of daily routine and helping her though many of its aspects. To be honest, that… that prepared me for my current lifestyle almost as much as my tutor did." He allowed himself a very small smile.
"I would love to hear about some of the families or masters you've served! Were any particularly memorable or left significant impressions on you or the way you live your life?"
"What caused you to be 'in-between masters' during the time you discovered Finer Things? What happened to the last one? Why have you had several masters instead of just having had one all your life?"
The butler perks up in his seat. "Ah, of course! Let's see... I'll just list some as they come to mind.
"I have worked for a Galvantula. Very sweet woman. Affectionate, kind. Lived alone. She had an interesting way of decorating her home, with these intricate webbings of spider silk." He spread both arms, gesturing to the entire room he sat in. "Everywhere. The house was completely overtaken with them. They were pretty, but still sticky. It took some getting used to, that's for certain!" he laughed.
"In some cases, a butler serves for a family and not just one person. I personally worked for a family where the parents were good proper folk, but their son was the one who demanded the most of my work. There's no other way of putting it: he was lazy. It was exasperating, I admit. He wanted me to bring him everything, do everything for him. And yes, that is my job, but in my opinion it was just him acting in sloth.
"A later master I worked under taught me that the relationship between master and butler can be so much more than that," he added to lighten the mood.
"A butler can be... a personal servant, an advisor, a confidant, a close friend," he spoke slowly, his gaze cast toward a window.
Cadbury's teacup was placed on its saucer, freeing his paws. Subconsciously, one of them rested atop his other in his lap, squeezing lightly.
There was a distant look in his eye, a smile on his face.
His attention returned, as did his eye contact. He hadn't realized he'd broken them until just then. "Ah, yes. Who else...?" he asks himself, pulling another example from memory.
"I've also worked for an Alolan Meowth. She was single and enjoyed gambling a great deal. In fact, I... I was 'won' by her. You see, this Meowth, she and my employer at the time, they were gambling together. And in the final hand, during a fit of desperation to cling to their pride, my current employer bet my employment. The Meowth won, and I was obligated to go work for her."
The Linoone leaned forward and inclined his head, tipping his nose downward to look at his conversation partner just a bit more seriously. His tone of voice hardens just enough to be noticeable.
"Let me teach you a hard lesson I've learned: no matter how successful you are at your job, there are always things beyond your control that may cause you to lose it. I've had my employment gambled away. I've had it transferred to friends of the family (under friendly terms, mind you). In a couple jobs, I was only hired for a temporary position to begin with. In one, I was to work with that master for life... and I did, as they passed away. Bless their soul." He shook his head, shutting his eyes in a brief moment of sad recollection.
"In other situations, your boss loses his fortune and cannot afford the luxury of a butler anymore. In some, political danger necessitates you abandon your position."
With another shake of his head, Cadbury took up his teacup and leaned back in his seat again. His eyes closed. "There are myriad reasons why you may transfer hands, or have to look for new work. It is in fact a rare myth that butlers find perfect masters whom they serve for life."
𝖎𝖝 ∭ 𝐏𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
An envelope sits upon a side-table, sealed with a disk of wax, centered in the spotlight of a desk lamp. It is addressed: "For Cadbury's eyes only."
Anyway, on a more serious note: Glowy, while I absolutely appreciate your efforts towards being responsive with other potential players and helping promote a culture of constructive criticism - and hope you continue doing so in the future - in this stage of the game, saying things like "I have a really severe doubt that she would pass the hiring process" and pointing out things that need to be added to the SU (like moveset descriptions) borders heavily on the language of a GM. I should be the only one making that kind of commentary.
Now, people are still free to ask questions and say what they liked or are confused about on another's SU, but please refrain from sounding too officious. There are many ways you can convert your more critical thoughts into constructive questions.
I've never heard of a dreadlock pompadour before and they're absolutely gorgeous.
This section's all good, though I do have one question: while I as a GM have no problem with a character sporting a greaser look (I imagine her bomber jacket with a baseball-style) and like how she uses it to differentiate herself, my in-character avatar Carmine would, especially on such an important night where the clientele are expected to dress up; I'm curious how you potentially intend to deal with this contention.
"They say treat your server well or they may spit in your food."
I'm screaming HELP 2 gud
I assume you didn't describe Double Slap because it's pretty self-explanatory, correct?
I only have one real comment on this section, concerning Encore: your description's well enough on how she performs it, but it doesn't go into detail on what its intended effect on its target is supposed to be. Like if a character falls prey to the "hype," how would you describe the effect as a status condition or Seasoning?
Camille, I will say up front that your writing is a treat to read. Your attention to detail is riveting, and the imagery used to describe just the environment she grew up around easily constructed itself in my mind. I also appreciate you building a character that brings something unexpected to an establishment that's dressed up all hoity-toity and holier-than-thou! Vivid, creative, and incredibly solid.
You make a reference that Qui-Qui has lived in the city for at least a couple of months, and suggest it has been much more than that, and I was wondering if there was an exact amount of time you had in mind?
I ask because I'm curious about her amount of influence; as noted by her prompt, she's very fluent and comfortable in slang and in the urban culture she romanticizes, and I don't see her struggling to exist within this unexpected "rockabilly" counterculture that she discovered living within the city, or alternatively showing much of her actual scrubland (possibly spaghetti western reminiscent, at least in appearance) history. I imagine someone who picked up a bygone urbanite human culture solely through little relics it left behind and emulates it on what she assumes or imagines it was like - since your writing implies the scene of her hometown underground was very different from it, considering the magazines and recorder provide a sense of newness to Qui-Qui, and therefore didn't reinforce it (unless I'm interpreting this wrong?) - would be a little more shaken when she actually has to exist within one similar to it. She must have had so many ideas projected in her mind about what it was like to live in one of the cities depicted in her treasures, especially since it was different than her upbringing, and I feel like being placed into the scene itself would show the various Oku Nnu threads coming off her personality. What you have could be justified, perhaps, by stating that she's actively trying to imitate the language of her new friends. The urban culture on her just sounds like it comes off too naturally or too strongly when she didn't even live in the setting until recently.
I hope all this is making sense. Like, to reiterate the point from a silly comparison, a sea-dweller can be very knowledgeable about the trends and scenery of land but as soon as you take them out of water and onto the grass, they'll have a pretty rough time breathing, and there will be those who can see the gills hanging off their cheeks even if they figure out how to evolve real fuckin' quick.
Something I agree with Glowy on is how exactly she passed an interview for Finer Things, especially reading the amount of slang speaks in. While it's fine with me, since the context you placed your prompt in and the way you write makes it easy enough to infer what some words mean - although, I will admit it took my second or third try to fully understand the prompt, due to my personal unfamiliarity with some terms; since that is just her voice and not the way you intend writing action, it's gooch - it's something that would certainly ruffle the feathers of prissy Carmine.
You could slip in a detail about her being hired by Lombardi, or her Dad having some sort of connection with Lombardi, because I feel our Chef would actually get a hoot out of Qui-Qui. How does that sound?
Also, here's all my commentary reel:
Spoiler:
Oku Nnu - as read by its sole, dilapidated town sign, with those the only letters not weathered away
This touch of worldbuilding was one of my favorites, it's so plausible to the setting and helps set the perfect mood to begin describing Qui Qui's backstory.
lol girl what did you think was gonna happen when you be banging a side boy on the regular
Nyaqa sounds like she was trying to get relief away from her harem and keep Vortiger a secret from everybody-everybody! And then they get all fifty shades of bitter and take her away from him and her child; very tragic for a woman who never gets to have a proper response to all this before she's hauled off.
unoccupied - which the townspeople claimed was always the case
I remember the first time I read this I was like "oooo stop lying," but maybe they honest-to-god didn't know? Nyaqa did seem like the secretive type, and they could've been squatters. We really have no idea what her life story was. Either way, interesting thought and adds to the mystery behind Mom.
in the fashion of Oku Nnu's culture, one he had grown to tolerate
I wonder what compelled him? Maybe he wanted to honor Nyaqa, or the place his child would be growing up in, or "anything was better than" naming her something after his home culture.
Hope you don't mind if I imagine this duo as huge stoners.next otp samman & dalia fanart when
mystical rainbow-colored rock that were being guarded in the mountains. They heard about buildings made of tall steel, ropes of lightning, blazing fires, deals and offices
The trinkets idea was an amazing way to give your character depth and justify her love of the alternative. She glamorizes an era she'll never fully understand - not even able to identify the beings as humans - and it's something she takes comfort in. Kinda like the rest of the Pokemon in this universe and the whole "50's aesthetic" application I've put on this RP, actually ... they're all parroting a bygone society they were previously just observers or small participants in. Qui Qui definitely exemplifies this.
completely appalled to find his daughter bound and battered, shut down operations for the night in a blind and unbridled rage
Like, I can't imagine how Vortiger must see himself now. Judging by the armor on those Haxorus, he came from a strong valor-orientated knights-and-knaves kind of city and escaped battling in a vicious war - an act which labeled him a criminal, but he certainly wouldn't see himself as one - only to, out of necessity, develop into exactly that, a criminal, and a strong draconic leader - giving off vibes of the rulers he ran away from - of a surly underground operation. And then see his daughter beat up by his cronies and budding into the same thing he is and only driving her more towards it through his hypocrisy and restricting her communication while not providing any himself ahhhhhhhhhhhh my HEART
same ring of Pokemon who captured and assaulted her two weeks before, Daiquiri was forced to keep her tongue in their cloaked and abated presence
*almost an hour of silence*
"... so, what do kids like doing nowadays?"
"Getting the shit kicked out of them by their Dad's henchmen."
"I, uh, I'm sorry kid, I didn't realize-" "Eat my huge pulsating dick, Steve."
they slipped through alleys and avoided nighttime patrolmen to find a certain cellar door
THIS BUST UP HAM HOCK LEG LOOKIN. I TOLD HER GET MY NAME OUT THEY STANK MOUTH. THEN JASMINE SAID SOMETHIN NOBODY LISTENED TO BECAUSE MUK HER, SHE A SECOND THOT.
As for your doubt, I don't know what to tell you, lol. Including what she's mentioned in her written parting shot, the only really reprehensible things I've expressed of her is that she enjoys a good brawl, and is willing to get into a fight over it. In a work environment, if it isn't directed at her, she will tend to "mind her own business" to whatever degree, but if something interests her, she may sleuth like she does in her nightlife. The threat of her father kicking her out to the street and losing a source of income is incentive enough to have her reigned in with this second attempt to keep a job. I've otherwise not really gone into detail about her actual mannerisms in the presence of different types of people, and I don't intend to, tbh. I'd add a Personality section to the app for that if I thought I wanted to describe how multi-faceted and nuanced this and that was, which wasn't really the point of my prompt or the method of her backstory.
What I meant to express is that a fine-dining establishment requires a lot of etiquette and manners, and from the way you've written your backstory and prompt, that doesn't appear to be something Qui-Qui has. So I wanted to recommend pondering how she would function in a role like this: Does she fake being polite to satisfy her employers and customers? Did she educate herself in etiquette in preparation for the job? Etc.
Anyway, on a more serious note: Glowy, while I absolutely appreciate your efforts towards being responsive with other potential players and helping promote a culture of constructive criticism - and hope you continue doing so in the future - in this stage of the game, saying things like "I have a really severe doubt that she would pass the hiring process" and pointing out things that need to be added to the SU (like moveset descriptions) borders heavily on the language of a GM. I should be the only one making that kind of commentary.
Now, people are still free to ask questions and say what they liked or are confused about on another's SU, but please refrain from sounding too officious. There are many ways you can convert your more critical thoughts into constructive questions.
FUCK I MIGHT HAVE TO COMPETE WITH THAT SASSY LIZARD, AKA, ITS YO GURL QQ
BETTER GO FIX UP TIMOTHY MCPINEAPPLE THE ARCEUS, SINCE I MIGHT BE IN ACTUAL RISK OF GETTING SHOVED ASIDE
For some reason I really enjoyed that little moment where "Dikeledi" was first playing with a cassette player and discovered the name Daiquiri, translating that term as a personal name. To be honest, I really hope to see more of this where human objects/conventions are being explored and valued but they're never fully understood. I mean, Kiyo explicitly said this is a world where humans and their legacy existed -- it's not like this is an AU where Pokemon only exist and they just happen to follow human trends for the sake of convenience.
also i want a fanfic dedicated to sammy and dally, the prickly duo who essentially act like beavis and butthead.
This section's all good, though I do have one question: while I as a GM have no problem with a character sporting a greaser look (I imagine her bomber jacket with a baseball-style) and like how she uses it to differentiate herself, my in-character avatar Carmine would, especially on such an important night where the clientele are expected to dress up; I'm curious how you potentially intend to deal with this contention.
I guess in my mind, I don't really have a grasp on how fancy dress can be for Pokemon in this town. I look at Carmine and he's a bird with glasses, a tie, and spats. For humanoid Pokemon, I can expect more tux and dress, but the 40's and 50's for females were dresses with largely the same silhouette and the cuts were utilitarian. So if QQ's bomber jacket had wider, padded shoulders, and an A-line shape, it'd be simple yet classy - which is basically the result of the fashion considering what else was going on in that period of history. It literally could pass for the top of a dress of the same form and color if I have the bomber in a trim-cut.
I only have one real comment on this section, concerning Encore: your description's well enough on how she performs it, but it doesn't go into detail on what its intended effect on its target is supposed to be. Like if a character falls prey to the "hype," how would you describe the effect as a status condition or Seasoning?
In the same way Encore in the games forces the target to repeat its last action, this basically is strongly encouraging the recipient of said hype to keep doing what it last did in the moment. I don't want to impose as another player how long the effect lasts in a time frame, or that it always works exactly as intended, or if the target ignores absolutely any other direction as it's completely enthralled in themselves. I feel like that'd otherwise be imposing too much and I kind of want to keep it in the realm of feeling natural or more realistic? What suggestions do you have for those specifics, now that I've said that it basically has the target repeat/continue what it did last/is doing currently?
Thank you so much for the praise! I'm glad you like my writing and find dimension in my character. I hope she can give the team that much more flavor if she's accepted! C:
You make a reference that Qui-Qui has lived in the city for at least a couple of months, and suggest it has been much more than that, and I was wondering if there was an exact amount of time you had in mind?
I ask because I'm curious about her amount of influence; as noted by her prompt, she's very fluent and comfortable in slang and in the urban culture she romanticizes, and I don't see her struggling to exist within this unexpected "rockabilly" counterculture that she discovered living within the city, or alternatively showing much of her actual scrubland (possibly spaghetti western reminiscent, at least in appearance) history. I imagine someone who picked up a bygone urbanite human culture solely through little relics it left behind and emulates it on what she assumes or imagines it was like - since your writing implies the scene of her hometown underground was very different from it, considering the magazines and recorder provide a sense of newness to Qui-Qui, and therefore didn't reinforce it (unless I'm interpreting this wrong?) - would be a little more shaken when she actually has to exist within one similar to it. She must have had so many ideas projected in her mind about what it was like to live in one of the cities depicted in her treasures, especially since it was different than her upbringing, and I feel like being placed into the scene itself would show the various Oku Nnu threads coming off her personality. What you have could be justified, perhaps, by stating that she's actively trying to imitate the language of her new friends. The urban culture on her just sounds like it comes off too naturally or too strongly when she didn't even live in the setting until recently.
Uh, I'd say she's lived in the city for five months now? Let's say that. Anything too specific comes off arbitrary to me though.
I see your point. This prompt is a letter, and I've evinced in there the build up to the incident happened over about a week's time (Monday she was getting food at The Breakfast Club and spied suspicious activity; Thursday was the fight). The letter is at least a day afterwards - several days later is more realistic - as she's been held accountable for burned clothes and has had to get daddy's money to pay it off. So she's had time to think out her letter.
What I imagined was the day she decided to quit, she went home and stewed over it. She got mad. She wanted to write a letter for the ages. She wanted bravado, she wanted sting, she wanted the people who wronged her to feel bad and she wanted to look tough doing it. So she's trying to work herself up into a mood. She's pacing back and forth in her room, repeating words, phrases, and lines she's heard from her friends and playing her cassette to her ear and flipping through zine pages. She's rehearsing what sounds best, and she's throwing in her own jabs. When she's got herself properly stirred, she takes a scrap piece of paper and she scrawls like mad until her train of thought dies down and she needs a break to get back into the zone again. Basically, her letter took time, so it only comes off like it's near-perfect because it's cultivated of only the choicest of disses, lol
That's not to say though that she doesn't have a grasp by now of some of the slang she uses. She's read over her magazines religiously and that cassette as well. Her idea of these cultures though are limited, and as she imagines, she has to fill in the blanks. In turn she sometimes makes her own speech up as if it would be common phraseology in that world, or as if she were setting a trend. An example is "Get mixed" - that's not, like, an actual thing in the public discourse, rofl. But it sounds like it would be. It's signature because of the "oomf" you imagine is behind it when said, and because as a girl named Daiquiri who's only ever heard of it as a frozen drink you mix, she's referencing herself.
But now that she's actually in a city that uses phrases completely different from the cultures she's gleaned, she's adapting to that too. It's making its way in there. It's easier for her to adapt to this though because now she's totally immersed in this world, as opposed to floating around in her imagination of what could be the kind of urban she's relished as a relic. Now people who speak this way are physically there to bounce them off of her. The slang she's had years and years to compile and test and even make up on her own will merge with the slang she can everyday hear in popular use.
Also, yes, I've just admitted that QQ sometimes makes things up as she goes along, it's not like you'd be able to tell the difference KIYO but that's the fun of it. She's a weird blend of actual slang terms that you and I know of, and aspiration to emulate and embody the trends behind it. Don't worry though, it won't be a common thing. Nearly all of the terms to be used will actually be real, rofl
Concerning the way she's not used any "slang" from Oku Nuu that you know of or could parallel to that culture, that's because she didn't put it in her letter. That's like an identity that's kind of bygone now that she's in a different audience. But if it puts her into perspective, my inspiration for QQ is in part from those American/European-influenced West African women in their drama movies. My parents are Liberian, so I've watched these things from time to time just because, but I basically mean that there's this kind of archetype in those movies of women into fashion, money, and walkabout business who like to emulate US/Euro culture or what is "modern" but are conniving and rude to the more bush ("country") girls because they think it's just more advantageous to be so selfish, or it's the equivalent of being smart and witty. It was always strange to me because while they tried to emulate one thing, they still had their roots and thick accents from the second-world.
When QQ speaks she has an accent, actually. That accent is from two things: Oku Nuu - which is personally inspired by both North African/Middle Eastern villages and American mining communes during the Industrial revolution as a blend of culture and values - and a little influence from her father Vortiger, who comes from a Renaissance England-inspired city-state. Stopping before I go full Orx.
I didn't address that she had an accent in her backstory though (NOTE), and I honestly overlooked it since I thought it was expected from how implied the different cultures I introduced were...? But duh, it obviously puts that much more perspective on her as this really impressionable melting pot, and it's a reminder that yes, she's tangibly "foreign." I just.... have to put into words how the accent sounds which is kind of hard because there aren't actually defined in-universe parallels of these cultures and movements by the same name......?
Pls halp
But I definitely feel like the contention of her getting used to this new town and the cultures she represents should be stronger, yeah. I just expect to express that through my character's interactions in a high-stress environment like I expect Finer Things to press. There's more processing of what to say and how in a much, much shorter amount of time with much, much different people.
Something I agree with Glowy on is how exactly she passed an interview for Finer Things, especially reading the amount of slang speaks in. While it's fine with me, since the context you placed your prompt in and the way you write makes it easy enough to infer what some words mean - although, I will admit it took my second or third try to fully understand the prompt, due to my personal unfamiliarity with some terms; since that is just her voice and not the way you intend writing action, it's gooch - it's something that would certainly ruffle the feathers of prissy Carmine.
You could slip in a detail about her being hired by Lombardi, or her Dad having some sort of connection with Lombardi, because I feel our Chef would actually get a hoot out of Qui-Qui. How does that sound?
I honestly feel like she'd just try her hardest to leave an above-decent impression (lol) because she doesn't want to be tossed out by pa. Since I've already revealed here that Vortiger is Renaissance Dad, he has "an upbringing," but I've never specified if he was an especially important Pokemon back where he grew up or if he just so happened to fulfill the basic prereq of an able-bodied 'mon, but by the way he freaked out when those Haxorus toppled into Oku Nuu, I hopefully implied there was something more? Plus he wears a cravat so Basically from the time she put in a letter to be hired and the date her household was called by Carmine, she told her father her intentions of joining the place, and he taught her a little with a crony by his side to arrange things because his hands are daggers.
Is that enough? Eh, I can see where it's not. So I'm totally down for Lombardi dealings with Mr. Cravat Casino. That'd have been a great secret, buuuut
I'll brainstorm a way to make that connection work. I'd like your private input on it too.
1. Oku Nuu salt shakers is such a great idea, like I love that subtle callback in connecting the world!
2. Tbh, if I were Nyaqa, I'd get bored of the same 30 guys, too. But jokes aside, you've interpreted the scene as I intended, so I'm sooo glad I could convey that.
3. Regarding the townspeople, I kind of imagined that Oku Nuu's populace always seemed like it was changing or larger than it was to residents not entirely in-the-know or up-to-date, because there's always groups literally coming up from the underground, which is just a massive maze of chambers, dealings, and events. I kind of wanted to suggest that the above-ground and the below-ground felt like two different worlds. Even the makeshift mayor of the bg was never seen or known by Vortiger, just always heard of like a rumor to him, especially since the bg felt outlaw-ish.
4. With Daiquiri's given name, all those reasons are valid, especially when you put Vortiger's situation into perspective.
5. Samman and Dalia are cactus cuties, not CHEECH AND CHONG CHUMPIES, CAN WE NOT
6. -humblebrags-
7. WHO DREW THAT, WHO DREW VORTIGER, WAS IT ECH? WAS IT YOU? ALSo caps lock off, I love pink Garchomp because his mega form is like perfect for ritzy 50s casino
8. I love Vortiger so much as a character, and I'm like a little giddy that you can also articulate the direction I was going for with him in the grand scheme, because it just validates that I was able to make it connect on analysis C:
9. LOL, ugh, writing that part tugged at my heart strings, like I honestly could feel the frustration and distance QQ had to go through sitting with these goons. And now she has to live with some of her dad's most trusted henchies in their rented townhouse as they try to treat her like a niece out of regret but uphold a professional emotional distance in reverence of their boss, so they've got their own inner conflict when dealing with either of them
10. Yes, they're not residents. You're killing all my secrets
11. I NEED to come up with a name for the Salandit gang, but idek? Bando Boys? The Red Handits (like their red tail mark looks like a hand + bandit kill me now)
12. -humblebrags Vol. 2-
13. Writing HAHAHAHAHA is the equivalent of tossing around "LMFAO" on the internet when someone says something and you wanna make it look like they're dumb af
14. Does she not give you life?
Alright! Thanks again for the review, Kiyo! I've got some things to think about in the meantime, that includes a Secret or two!
These are all good! I really like how he "inherited" his silky fur from another species, and the way you flair up your movement descriptions to have a restaurant style is incredibly fun to read and fits right into the setting.
Would you say he's an active pacifist? Or just lacks the capacity or desire to fight?
Ooo, very straight-laced. A man groomed so thoroughly from the start of his life by his environment, lifestyle, and parent must have such a distinct impression of himself or how situations should be handled. Leaning on sycophantic, actually. I really want to see this guy getting his feathers - or rather, pristine fur - ruffled and see his defensiveness and "I'm justified!" attitude surface.
And that assignment, especially with the inclusion of his Mother's new story, add some nice, juicy material to sample and adds context to why he is who he is. Still, I'm riveted how well you dealt with my questions.
He is by-the-book, comfortable only with the proper procedure, both that his employer has set, and that he considers part of his own lifestyle
You must stand up straight and you must always be smartly turned out. A good attitude means adopting a "no job too small" mentality. Good manners and total discretion are paramount.
he allows himself to be comfortable within his job (in contrast to being stiff and uptight about it), so that the guests can see and feel that ease about him, and also feel comfortable themselves.
Hm, that last quote in particular seems to be at odds with the other details? I'm confused. For someone described so cut-and-dry and by-the-book and nitpicky - which sound like great details to contrast with other characters or customers that might be outlandishly eccentric - those details do sound stiff and uptight, so to suddenly turn on those doesn't read quite right.
This section builds James to be this fun, strict character, only to break it down and be like "he's just his livin' his life, he's not uptight or pretentious!" to then switch and say "yeah, he can be stuffy" again, he's projecting his stick-up-his-ass attitude onto the restaurant. Unless you mean that the "performance" of his duties involve giving off the impression of an easygoing mentality; which is a solution that can retain his more rigid features because it's technically artifice and makes more sense. If this is the case, this detail needs to be adjusted to make this clear.
I'm only accepting present tense because we've already gone over it hmMMMM
And it's this prompt that's having difficulty portraying all this new work you've incorporated into Cadbury. The situation he's in - a duty that treads the line of being unprofessional but entails his humble service, and also might reveal a thing or two about his personal life that he wouldn't necessarily want to air out at his workplace - while it does have it's delicious moments (which you can extract in my commentary reel) and it displays his uncomfortableness, I don't feel the stakes or all the juicy details of the internal struggle you've implied he would have. It doesn't have his punches, those meaty details about him and his code of ethics, except for a few, tiny, short-lived gems. I'd love to see this prompt revised (and in present tense grAH) with all the new things you've built into him in mind!
These pictures are the cutest! I think they definitely give off the impression of "no ordinary Linoone." also he looks better in my color scheme rip you
Nothing at all covers his lower body, but no matter.
he gets to be an active observer, even participant, as his master's trusted advisor. Maybe he likes it because his intelligence, diligence, and technique get appreciated by someone undeniably more important
Interesting thought: I wonder if this was his assumption at first, and he's not actually satisfied with his job in the restaurant, since he's projecting the job he actually wants and was groomed for onto it?
his soft spots include cheesecake and adorable outfits
Cadbury looks at him from the backseat, pausing his work with the comb and lifting his brows. The Gumshoos takes note of how the Linoone is dressed. "Sir," he corrects.
Like, it really subtly details what Cadbury expects from the world and how he perceives himself. Just a small, cold glare like "bitch say that again please" and the driver is like "o shit um sir" mmmmm 5 stars
And if you could not drive too terribly fast, I'd appreciate it.
It's the only straight thing about him ayOOOOOOOOOOOO
He almost wishes he'd been asked in person, but admittedly he might not have taken the offer in that case, flummoxed by the protocol between server and customer. The rabbit was clever in that regard, more clever than Cadbury had initially given credit, going through his boss like that.
senpai, but we can't be doing this, we're both guys!!
You should probably hook up with Ech, he really likes furry trap yaoi
This brings up so many questions about how Lopunnys are perceived in the Pokemon world, lol. Like, all those males being misgendered left and right must give some a complex!
embarrassed at the thought of being seen on a gay date by his co-workers and his bosses
Oh, when he got serious and into it like he was telling a secret or hard truth, I got so engaged. There's this ... firm melancholy in the speech that followed. Nice detail here.
Oh, sounds like my kind of swanky! I gotchu; we'll just have to see how he feels in the RP itself and how she compares, hm? he's just a crotchety old man don't pay no mind
It could be that she can use the move as a persuasive tool, like she cheers on someone to do a certain task - whether that be at the suggestion of herself or otherwise - and they get hyped to do it. I feel "constantly repeat the action," while reminiscent to the actual move, sounds ... weird and doesn't have much use? Idk.
Ugh, even when you're establishing context you're mmmmmmm
That totally makes sense when you put it that way! The letter was labored, premeditated, and your explanations behind her ability (and inspirations, which are very intriguing in of themselves) put everything into perspective about how who she is today compares with her upbringing. That's all I needed to see about it, and more!
I just.... have to put into words how the accent sounds which is kind of hard because there aren't actually defined in-universe parallels of these cultures and movements by the same name......?
I think Malignant did an interesting move where she described her Cadbury's accent by describing the region itself, or what his voice could bring to mind from those places? It's also an SU and not an in-character post, so you could list it clinically, if you find no other way to.
I just expect to express that through my character's interactions in a high-stress environment like I expect Finer Things to press
My only fetish is eviscerating my own peepee to summon a succubus.
Also, I edited my first post, the one where I had Timothy McPineapple the Non-Binary but also Masculine Arceus (RIP), and placed in a WIP for my character. What's currently there is set in stone for the most part, unless I change my mind about something or I'm informed of any discrepancies or anything that directly infringes on the rules. Workshop my App, people. Write my shit for me. I am a trog who lives in Kiyo's basement.
Samuel's secret was that he was an undercover agent working for the NSA (National Store Agency) trying to prove Amaryllis is actually growing weed in her back garden with intent to distribute.
It's the reason Rina died of overdose and why Cicaro/Spora joined in the first place. Addicts. All of 'em.
meanwhile SA was a satanic cult revolving around a lucario demon
I'm so happy Qui-Qui is well-received, lol. She's like becoming my favorite creation and if I don't make the cut, I'd definitely keep her story for elsewhere. Heck, I may even flesh out Vortiger's story too, because pink Mega Garchomp is daddy material, yee. I just think she has a lot to offer in an adversarial position towards like the projected image of the place. Rebel 4 lyf
ECH YOUR FONT IS PRETTY. And your Primarina story is gripping already, I'm like on the edge of my seat waiting to read, she's so tragic. I wonder who made a tent out of Seel skin like wtf
I just want to read more apps. I wanna read that variety and c o m p e t i t i o n
- Appearance -- A Pyukumuku who stands at about 1'00", typical for any other species of Pyukumuku. Her body however while as brown as the normal species of Pyukumuku, is even more squishy and elastic. She can serve as a playful plush toy for others, or for an ability for her to curl up into a ball.
- Moveset -- Water Sport / Helping Hand / Curse / Recover
How are you guys making those beautiful CSS SUs?? Mine are so plain and simple (which is what I prefer lmao).
Mine is a work in progress, just so you know. I just need the prompt which is I am currently brainstorming. My character is a little....complex, especially as a grass type haha.
If it's not too much of a cop-out: A little of column A, a little of column B. But... Moreso B.
Who's Kiyo? said:
I really want to see this guy getting his feathers - or rather, pristine fur - ruffled and see his defensiveness and "I'm justified!" attitude surface.
That shouldn't be too hard for me to play, hahaha.
/self deprecating humour
Who's Kiyo? said:
"he allows himself to be comfortable within his job (in contrast to being stiff and uptight about it), so that the guests can see and feel that ease about him, and also feel comfortable themselves."
Hm, that last quote in particular seems to be at odds with the other details? I'm confused. For someone described so cut-and-dry and by-the-book and nitpicky - which sound like great details to contrast with other characters or customers that might be outlandishly eccentric - those details do sound stiff and uptight, so to suddenly turn on those doesn't read quite right.
"Cadbury adopts the words of his father..."
He adopts these words, but how does he interpret them? How does he translate these words into actions, and how do these actions compare with his dad's?
I can strike the "comfortable" paragraph from the record, if that would help?
Who's Kiyo? said:
Unless you mean that the "performance" of his duties involve giving off the impression of an easygoing mentality; which is a solution that can retain his more rigid features because it's technically artifice and makes more sense.
I guess this is an option?? It's a bit confusing, it sounds like it could be difficult to pull off.
Who's Kiyo? said:
I don't feel the stakes or all the juicy details of the internal struggle you've implied he would have. It doesn't have his punches, those meaty details about him and his code of ethics, except for a few, tiny, short-lived gems. I'd love to see this prompt revised (and in present tense grAH) with all the new things you've built into him in mind!
I suppose I could expand the actual at-the-table section of the story instead of cut away. Which "new things" are you hoping to see?
Or you could ask more questions to put into An Interrogatory Dialogue. Unless asking him directly wouldn't get the kind of demonstration you're looking for.
Also I can't help but notice you accidentally asked me to write it in present tense yet again. Haha.
Who's Kiyo? said:
These pictures are the cutest! I think they definitely give off the impression of "no ordinary Linoone." also he looks better in my color scheme rip you
One's drawn by Keijimatsu, the other's drawn by my friend derFisch.
Also no way, man. The blue goes EXACTLY with Cadbury's eyes. *uses Baby-Doll Eyes @ u*
Who's Kiyo? said:
"becoming a server at a place like this would be every bit as fulfilling as working as a butler"
Interesting thought: I wonder if this was his assumption at first, and he's not actually satisfied with his job in the restaurant, since he's projecting the job he actually wants and was groomed for onto it?
Wow, the west can have cheesecake and adorable outfits too.
Thinking on it (and taking your joke way too far), I don't think Cadbury would be very worldly and probably be very centered on the western ideas of what's proper.
Spoiler:
Cadbury:
Who's Kiyo? said:
"Cadbury looks at him from the backseat, pausing his work with the comb and lifting his brows. The Gumshoos takes note of how the Linoone is dressed. "Sir," he corrects."
NO WAIT I LOVE THIS PART
Like, it really subtly details what Cadbury expects from the world and how he perceives himself. Just a small, cold glare like "bitch say that again please" and the driver is like "o shit um sir" mmmmm 5 stars
These last four quote boxes made me laugh quite a bit~.
Who's Kiyo? said:
This brings up so many questions about how Lopunnys are perceived in the Pokemon world, lol. Like, all those males being misgendered left and right must give some a complex!
Pff, you think Lopunnies have it bad? Try male Gardevoir, Milotic, Primarina, Gothitelle, Sylveon, the list goes on.
Who's Kiyo? said:
"Oh, that's right, I guess you know the menu by heart, huh?"
I really like this detail, for some reason. It's so him, like "of course this motherfucker knows this menu, oh cadbury."
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/jruxWUh.png?1 "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
Cadbury is a Linoone who has been trained to stand biped, putting him at 3'3". As all Linoone, his half-lidded eyes are entirely blue except for his slit pupils, and brown stripes mark his creamy-furred body, most notably one stripe atop his head that forms an arrow.![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/WhSsMLu.png "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/bzLDYIa.png "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/oM4Heod.png "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://media.giphy.com/media/12UlfHpF05ielO/giphy.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://media.giphy.com/media/wmsjvA5UH8Xqo/giphy.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://elysesnow.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/tumblr_me62r9pxrl1ql5yr7o1_500.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://www.reactiongifs.com/r/wddd.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://68.media.tumblr.com/688e526e64d6edd7e116ea0212560807/tumblr_o1j5vl8fQ11v6trp0o1_500.png "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://media.tenor.co/images/cea8d07563939788233afe8da9ea9da4/raw "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdk95ii0kc1qgb3on.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://ioneglobalgrind.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/yasss1.gif?w=730&h=410 "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m42e4dj5kW1rw7c5no1_400.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/946Bb.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/03/19/635940178575837478183715954_tumblr_lyikkjSRQy1qmzq91o1_500.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://media.giphy.com/media/RHiD0K65NxxLO/giphy.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/GIF/2014/08/GIF-aww-yea-bite-lip-Christopher-Walken-dat-ass-sexytime-GIF.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/jsvCEqd.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/UJmvu9V.jpg "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/UK45XMq.gif "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/Svp9Wqx.png?1 "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/RmmWvPi.png?1 "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/il1Fn3G.png?1 "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")
![[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]](https://i.imgur.com/wzXt0Og.png?1 "[PokeCommunity.com] Off The Menu [Aw, ain't you a big tickle?] [T] [OOC]")