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Specific Fears and Phobias

I have this very annoying conflict between adoring the ocean and marine life, and having a strong fear of deep water, especially out in the ocean where it's just... emptiness. Once you're under the surface it's just murky dark emptiness that never seems to end, and the deeper you go the more alien-like and terrifying the lifeforms get. I can't swim so that definitely compounds my fear! I've always been scared of deep water (had a few near drowning experiences as a kid).

It's weird because I love watching videos of scuba diving and even playing Subnautica. They give me this dark twisted feeling of loneliness and terror but also a weird sense of calm... like how I imagine being in space is like. I hope I can conquer this fear one day, learn to swim and dive. Especially when they improve technology for breathing underwater. It'd be magic!

Although... I also have to get over my intense fear of large or dangerous sea creatures, which haunts me a lot more and is the scariest part of Subnautica. ^^;

Pretty much all my fears just stem from an overarching fear of death. So I have a LOT of fears.
 
Trypophobia - Fear of clusters of holes. For me it's Honeycombs, lotus flower head and those weird ass pictures on the internet of the holes in skin.

I have a fear of living alone but not necessarily being alone if I had to. I've always had a fear of storms to the point where if I know it's going to be bad I will babysit the tv and my laptop. I will actually have a panic attack when the tornado sirens go off. I fear storms but love to study the weather and more specifically thunderstorms and tornadoes...lol. I've always wanted to be a meteorologist as a kid.
 
  • I used to have a phobia of appendicitis for some reason. But then I had my c section and was like, "okay my appendix needing removal wouldn't be so bad comparatively".

  • I hate deep ocean water. It's terrifying. I'm fascinated by it. It's oddly gorgeous in all of its mystery and danger, but still makes me uneasy and I never want to go on a boat.

  • I have a deep-seated fear of someone breaking into my house. I keep the doors and windows locked, always have big dogs, and have a just-in-case gun. My husband never locked the door back at his parents' place and I had to basically demand that he remember to ALWAYS lock the doors because he kept making me anxious and giving me actual nightmares. I've not yet had a house I've lived in be broken into (knock on wood; I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious), but I live in a not great area where it's an ever-present fear not far from me.

  • I am now terrified of ever being pregnant and giving birth again. Hooray birth trauma. It's caused a lot of other side-effects that I can't go into.

  • Terrified of spiders, but for good reason. I'm allergic to most spider venom and will have to go to the hospital for treatment or I might die. I still keep them around the house without worry. It's very rare to get bitten by a spider so I'm never worried about the little cellar spider in the corner. I'd lose my mind worrying about all of them.

  • I'm mildly scared of the dark. My mind likes to fake me out by pretending there's something in the room with me. It'll just make up vague shapes and movement in the corners. So I have to sleep with a nightlight to avoid it. Plus it's helpful if I go into sleep paralysis.

  • Strokes, seizures, heart attacks, cancer; any kind of severe illness, I'm very afraid of, and often worry about them, which is tiring as you may imagine. Epilepsy runs in my dad's side of the family and though I've never had an episode (EXTREME KNOCKING ON WOOD), I'm always afraid of flashing lights, even if they're not enough to cause an episode in someone who IS epileptic. Which means I can't go in haunted houses during Halloween 😭

[PokeCommunity.com] Specific Fears and Phobias
There are a few more things but I think these are the strongest fears I have, or at least the most important ones.
 
Spiders themselves don't scare me, but when you turn or something and there's one RIGHT THERE it can be freaky. I usually yelp before taking it and throwing it outside.
 
I'm terrified of the dark. It's to the point I refuse to even sleep without a light on. I won't watch tv in the dark, I won't go to the bathroom in the dark at night, and I cover my eyes when my dad turns of the light in the morning when it's dark outside. I don't know, I have this innate fear of having a seizure if I watch tv in the dark, or use electronics in the dark, and am afraid of just sitting in a room without lights on, so I always keep the lights on, no matter what. I don't know, I'm honestly just scared, is all.
 
Entomophobia and arachnophobia are indeed the ones I have. I am scared by almost any kind of insect. I love animals and for some extent I am even curious to learn about insects as well, but on the other hand I kinda just feel paralyzed when I see them. Most of them look disgusting to me, but especially I think I am afraid of how they may act, like some sort of unexpected behaviour, which may explain why entomophobia belongs to the category of anxiety disorders.
What makes me anxious is the fact that I know that insects can suddenly spawn and it's me that has to deal with them, trying to free them and so on. I am relatively ok with that when it is about bees/wasps or small insects that are not cockroaches. Like, I can do that. I can free them and stuff. It still takes me time and some courage but I can do that. For the rest, I am really unsure how I would act lol. I remember that one day I heard a bumblebee getting in the house, in the place where we usually eat. And very courageously I decided not to leave my room till my parents would have found out and tried to free it or till it would have got out on its own. But it never did. So, while eating my dad goes like "I feel something" and it was the dead bumblebee (rip) and btw that's when I kinda had panic attack because I had dinner with a dead bumblebee under my table wtf.
Tbh we had dinner several hours after I had heard the bumblebee come in and not hearing any more sounds, I thought it was gone. Well, nope... it wasn't...

Other than this, I also have some agoraphobia, but not really extended to places, but more to situations because I am not good at socializing and, in general, at speaking, especially to new people. My kind often goes frozen when it's about social interaction, with strangers especially.
 
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