Serious Does it really matter what others think of you?

[EmTheGhost]

Honestly? Objectively, I know that it doesn't matter, but I have a hard time feeling like it, because - just about every single person who's ever told me that other people's opinions don't matter has gone on to judge other people, seemingly under the impression that it matters. I know that objective reasons why something is true are all that matters, not how popular a viewpoint is, but it's just hard to hold on to your beliefs when everyone around you, even the people who agree with them on paper, think the opposite way.

 

[Circuit]

For me honestly I don't really care all that much what people think of me? People like me if they want to like me and if they don't well that's fine too, to each their own. For friends and family that I'm close to I'll strive to make them happy and please them, but not in a way that undermines who I am as a person. Basically I try to be as nice and friendly as I can to everyone, how my nan would have wanted me to be. It doesn't matter who you are or where you come from, if you're cool with me I'm cool with you. I aim to be a nice person, helpful, friendly and accepting, and I do want people to like me but I wont force the issue and it doesn't mater to me if that doesn't work out.

Overall, it's kind of a yes and no answer, but in the grand scheme of things no.

 

[Fleurdelis]

Well yes, but actually no.

Sure it feels good when people have positive opinions about you, but in the end if you are content with who you are then that is all that is needed.

 

[Kitty]

The answer I want to give here is no, but the honest answer I can give is yeah kinda. I don't mind if the people who I dont particularly like/don't care about think of me as the worst person in the world- its probably because I am the worst person in the world to them; but generally for people that I like, especially people that I care about, their opinion about me matters. Sometimes it matters too much that I get anxious about it but that's life and as much as I want to get over that slope, I have to learn how to get up there first and master it. I think I'm halfway there though at least!

 

[o1a1d1s1]

Personally don't care. I'm trying to temper my ego until it's almost non-existent but hard enough to maintain a solid character. People are saying a lot of things but words... Words are usually egoistic. It's nice to hear "good" words about yourself but is there any weight behind them? Hardly. The thing in the mirror is slowly changing. That's a fact.

 

[Zaddd]

I really do not regard anyone's opinion of me unless they know my flaws well. However, I usually be polite to people a lot, but I have to be very careful who I am dealing with. For example, if a person shows a lack of sagacious perspective and takes it for granted by ignoring my perspective on a topic and only cares about themselves, I completely ignore them because for 1: I hate jerks. And 2: if anyone tells me what to do without giving me a proper, rational reason why I should listen to them makes them a bad person (a.k.a. ignorant and sometimes stubborn). You just need to have common sense and find purpose in your life as long as you disregard people's opinions because they don't know or realize what you're going through.

 

[CiCi]

Me, personally? I don't care. At all. If I ever withhold information about myself, it's because I don't feel like debating aspects of myself with someone else. I don't care if they don't like what I think or have to say, sometimes I just can't be arsed to deal with the consequences.

Me being asocial has had "negative" impacts on my life. Most of my relatives don't bother keeping in contact with me but I also like it that way. My mom and grandmother (and sometimes my brother if his head isn't stuck up his own ass that day) still love me and enjoy being around me and that's plenty. My fiancee still loves me and my company and I really don't care if randos like me. If they do, they can eventually be my friend. If they don't, then good, my social battery is always at 5% anyway.

 

[Nanusmightyena]

Me personally, I don't. I'm antisocial af unless I like you. And that's my problem. I only care what people think when it conflicts with the politics of my job. Most jobs I've had are very political in the sense you need people to like you to keep your job. Unfortunately, that's my problem. Most people don't like me, lmao.

 

[Venonat in Space]

A lot of people call me "rude" and way over half the time, I don't even know what I did that made me "rude." ...... you think I care by now?

Who cares what other's think because as long as you're not hurting anyone or anything, you cool.

You do you. :)

 

[pkmin3033]

Only if you want it to...so that's a very situational "yes" and "no" I suppose. Generally other people's opinions don't matter to me at all, except for occasional spells where I suddenly realise that nobody actually likes me and suddenly EVERYONE'S opinion of me matters to me. It's weird.

I think it's a little more complicated than mattering or not mattering, though...we are all central to our own story, and of course when we include other people in that story, we want that to reflect positively on our own self-image. People not liking us does not reflect well on that story, and that matters. I think it's probably more accurate to say that our belief in other people's opinions of us is more important than the reality of other people's opinions of us...which is an extremely self-centered and egocentric thing to say I suppose, but then, this is probably why my life is basically one long, rambling soliloquy. Whenever I try and seek external validation I generally get stones thrown at me, so it's best not to look. xD

 

[Bahamut]

I worry about what others think of me sometimes.

 

[Ys]

Yes and no?

At a personal level, you don't owe it to anyone else to be a certain person. If someone likes you then that's great, if they don't then that's not really your problem usually. It's important to stay true to yourself.

We don't live in a vacuum though and the reality is that how other people see you is very important. It affects work, relationships, hobbies, financial agreements, judicial rulings etc etc etc

This post from gimmepie summarizes it for me. I care what people think in a general sense and I try to give a good image, especially at my work and with my family. But then I don't care as much about what strangers or other people I'm not as close to may think about me on a personal level because I don't owe them anything and they don't owe me anything either.