~Make A Wish and have it horribly corrupted ~

[Sapphire Rose]

Granted, the national holiday is about throwing rotten tomato's at specifically you.

I wish for a cute cat.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, but it's only cute when you're not around to see it!

I wish for some delicious chocolate milk... and biscuits 😊

 

[StCooler]

Granted, but it's dark chocolate without any sugar, and the biscuits just dissolve in the chocolate!

I wish for a ton of Kinder Maxis.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, here's a ton of children (Kinder) named Maxi.

I wish for a big cake =D

 

[Starlight]

Here you go! *splats it in your face* 😊

I wish for more non-vegan vegetarian options on menus

 

[Duck]

Granted. You may now go on restaurants and buy a nice raw egg in these trying times.

I wish I didn't have a cold.

 

[StCooler]

Granted, but you are now allergic to your computer.

I wish for a pizza.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, but its with anchovies, pineapple and lots and lots of.... Raisins!
this to me sounds gross, but hey, maybe you'll like it?

I wish for a trip abroad.

 

[Duck]

Granted, you start your flight before being told your plane must turn around.

I wish for non-stinky cheese

 

[faf]

Granted but it is not edible.

I wish I were a dragon irl.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, you are now a Komodo dragon....

I wish for a new lawnmower

 

[Megan]

Granted, you get a hat with lawnmower blades on top. Now you only need to wear it and continuously drag on the cord to make them move.

I wish for anemones to grow on trees.

 

[Duck]

Granted. They suck the tree dry of nutrients and then die because they can't get anymore.

The mass tree deaths create a global crisis.

I wish my packages got delivered the same day I bought them.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, but they arrive all soggy and whatever is inside is broken!

I wish for another week off.

 

[StCooler]

Granted. But you get bored to death, and you start a new videogame. You enjoy it, and you decide you should stream it. You become a Twitch streamer, you become successful, and decide to quit your job. And the day after, Jeff Bezos wants to congratulate you because you become number 1 streamer in the world. Now he offers you to join Team Rocket, and you refuse, so he eventually bans you from Twitch, and you become unemployed.
So much in one week.

I wish for more efficiency in my work.

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, you are taken to a shady laboratory and wake up a Cyborg. You recover faster than anticipated, overpower the lab people and turn them into cyborgs too. You then pull people from the streets and nearby buildings on a daily basis to expand the CyberCooler Army, eventually converting the entire city!
The future looks bleak for normal humans.

I wish for a swimming pool.

 

[StCooler]

Granted, you get a very large swimming pool, and all the related accomodation. You spend the best summer of your life, you do pool parties every other day with your friends, you become super popular.
But near your home is the embassy of Randomstan. They were hiding some diplomatic personality that the police of half of the whole world is looking for. One day, the embassy is attacked by some secret service agency, and the guy has to flee in order not to be caught. He runs accross multiple backyards, and finally ends up in yours. Unfortunately, he stumbles on an misplaced rock, and falls into your swimming pool. Unfortunately (bis), he cannot swim, and before you know it, he drowns and dies.
His death is seen as a diplomatic incident, and Randomstan declares war on Netherlands. The USA and Europe join your country, while Russia and China become Randomstan's allies. World War 3 begins.
All that because of a swimming pool.

I wish I didn't need to change my clothes everyday.

 

[Megan]

Granted, all your clothes are now gone.

I wish I could understand what all those scientific papers say.

 

[Duck]

Granted. They all say "Buy a subscription on Elsevier for $999.99/month for the real paper"

I wish it weren't raining right now

 

[ReKoil]

Granted, it is now dry and 58 degrees celsius. Have fun baking in the oven outside 😉

I wish for a new set of fancy clothes