~Make A Wish and have it horribly corrupted ~

[Megan]

Granted, but it is delivered in cube form.

I wish for a new pencil.

 

[ElBurrito]

Granted, but the lead/graphite breaks every time you try to write with it.

I wish I had superpowers.

 

[StCooler]

Granted. Your two superpowers are:

1. You can transform, whenever you want, into a tree. (But you cannot move)
2. Refrigerators now obey you. However, they cannot do much more than open their doors and change the freezing temperature.

I wish my pancakes didn't stick to the pan this morning.

 

[Megan]

Granted, but now everything you put in that pan slips right out of it!

I wish I had some new furniture.

 

[StCooler]

Granted, you go to Ikea but every furniture you buy misses screws.

I wish I had 180 IQ.

 

[Starlight]

Granted! Congratulations, your image quality is 180!

I wish for the end of famine.

 

[StCooler]

Granted, the Great Famine of 1315-1317 is now over.

I wish car accidents didn't exist.

 

[Squirtlenator]

granted but, now we get around by animals

I wish for a nice steak dinner...

 

[Megan]

Granted, but the prices are horrendous!

I wish for global pollution to go down.

 

[StCooler]

Granted, but any vehicle that uses gas disappears.

I wish I could run as fast as Usain Bolt.

 

[pokemon fan person]

granted, but you have to run 5 miles to actually be that fast

i wish for something to wish for

 

[StCooler]

Granted, but you wish for the end of humanity, and it happens without corruption.

I wish I didn't waste that much time on gaming instead of making my fangame :(

 

[Duck]

Granted, you finally made the ultimate fan simulator: with a fluid simulation physics engine so complex physics and engineering departments around the world want to use. Shame no one wants to play a game to see how a fan works though.

I wish I could eat sweets without worrying about getting fat or getting cavities.

 

[Megan]

Granted, but now every time you eat sweets you need to occupy the toilet afterwards.

I wish for more posts on my post counter.

 

[StCooler]

Granted, but now PokéCommunity is renamed MeganCommunity as 99,65% of the total posts are from you.

I wish I had a new computer.

 

[pokemon fan person]

granted, but the computer crashes once a day or more

i wish to win a cuteness contest in pokemon platinum

 

[ElBurrito]

Granted, but now you can't do anything else in the game as it softlocks you into the winning ceremony.

I wish I hadn't forgotten most of the Spanish I had previously learned.

 

[Megan]

Granted, but now you randomly burst out in Spanish idioms.

I wish I could still remember all those Latin lessons from back in the day.

 

[ElBurrito]

Granted, but now you constantly summon demons on accident just by thinking.

I wish I was a turtle.

 

[pokemon fan person]

granted, youre now permanently a squirtle. you didn't say anything about turtle pokemon...

i wish for something to wish for!