Azonic
hello friends
- 7,123
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Age 12
- stranger danger
- Seen Jun 4, 2018
You make my sirens blare, baby.
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Things you don't say to a cop
- Thread starter Ho-Oh
- Start date
- 11,359
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Seen yesterday
Your car has no hydraulics.
Your car sucks.
Your car sucks.
XxZer0xX
......................... Beep.
- 170
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- ..................My chair?
- Seen Jun 24, 2009
Cop: You know why I pulled you over?
You: Depends on how long you were following me!
Cop: Why don't we just take it from the top?
You: Here goes: I sped. I followed too closely. I ran a stop sign. I almost hit a Chevy. I sped some more. I failed to yield at a crosswalk. I changed lanes at the intersection. I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light and speeding!
Cop: Is that all?
You: No... I have unpaid parking tickets!
Credit to the funny-*** movie Liar Liar.
You: Depends on how long you were following me!
Cop: Why don't we just take it from the top?
You: Here goes: I sped. I followed too closely. I ran a stop sign. I almost hit a Chevy. I sped some more. I failed to yield at a crosswalk. I changed lanes at the intersection. I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light and speeding!
Cop: Is that all?
You: No... I have unpaid parking tickets!
Credit to the funny-*** movie Liar Liar.
Azonic
hello friends
- 7,123
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Age 12
- stranger danger
- Seen Jun 4, 2018
$10 if you let me off with a warning.
- 11,359
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Seen yesterday
Your wife has a reputation as a drag racer.
- 299
- Posts
- 16
- Years
- Seen May 2, 2025
To a male cop:
Dad?
To a female cop:
Mom?
Dad?
To a female cop:
Mom?
XxZer0xX
......................... Beep.
- 170
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- ..................My chair?
- Seen Jun 24, 2009
Okay, so i was speeding and you caught me. Wanna go best of 3?
XxZer0xX
......................... Beep.
- 170
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- ..................My chair?
- Seen Jun 24, 2009
(If the cop is male) Is that a baton in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?
(If male or female) Hey, I was just on my way to your sister's house!
(If male or female) Hey, I was just on my way to your sister's house!
- 11,359
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Seen yesterday
My gun beats your gun.
:o
:o
XxZer0xX
......................... Beep.
- 170
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- ..................My chair?
- Seen Jun 24, 2009
(When they put the handcuffs on) Weird. Usually, my dates buy me dinner first.
XxZer0xX
......................... Beep.
- 170
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- ..................My chair?
- Seen Jun 24, 2009
Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off my lap and got lodged between the brake pedal and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.
Capt. Couch
Wake me... When you need me...
- 331
- Posts
- 16
- Years
- United States of America
- Seen May 30, 2009
- I think maybe Mr. Andrew Jackson might be able to change your mind.
- Can I be the siren?
- Looking for your cat? Check my tires.
- Who said you were racing too?
- Ok, just hold on a second. Let me hide the drugs...
- Can I be the siren?
- Looking for your cat? Check my tires.
- Who said you were racing too?
- Ok, just hold on a second. Let me hide the drugs...
- 614
- Posts
- 16
- Years
- england.
- Seen Jan 16, 2014
My trigger finger slipped. honest
- 3,581
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Age 117
- Burbank, CA
- Seen Feb 17, 2014
Cop: "Son, do you know why I pulled you over?"
You: *hold up a box of fresh donuts* you could smell 'em!
*jump to passenger seat while waiting for cop to walk up o the window*
"He was here a second ago. Me? Drive? Oh heck no, I'm ****ed up"
You: *hold up a box of fresh donuts* you could smell 'em!
*jump to passenger seat while waiting for cop to walk up o the window*
"He was here a second ago. Me? Drive? Oh heck no, I'm ****ed up"
beauty. proletariat
Banned
- 1,501
- Posts
- 19
- Years
- Sydney, Australia
- Seen Jun 19, 2011
(a guy saying this) hey! dont pull ME over! Im pregnant!
- 11,359
- Posts
- 17
- Years
- Seen yesterday
Batmans belt is waaay better.
