Superpowers... with a flaw!

[Megan]

Your power gets a ton of use, as well. There's a lot of people with digestive problems around that keep you occupied.

I want the power of writing proper essays without any issues!

 

[StCooler]

Well, that's what it is. You become the Empress of essays, but you cannot publish (=issue) them anywhere.

I have the power to read my computer's mind.

 

[ReKoil]

Here's a mirror. Your computer does what YOU tell it to after all!
Have fun reading your own mind =D

I have the power to pacify any hostile creatures that come near me.

 

[Starlight]

Granted, you are now able to shove a pacifier in the creatures mouth before it gets you! It's just gonna spit it out and then eat you of course, but you got what you wanted ;)

I need the ability to live without water.

 

[Arcaneum]

Granted… oh wait a minute. It appears that you can in fact live without water, but it means everyone else has to as well as you evaporate any water source within a mile of you.

I REALLY could do with the power of pyrokinesis (manipulating fire).

 

[ReKoil]

Can't you already? You can slide or rotate the button on your stove to make the fire go smaller & bigger!

You have it, but now firefighters keep showing up around you to hose you down whenever you try to use it!

I'll have the power to create and control ice.
I wanna make my own ice cream okay D=

 

[StCooler]

The problem? After using your power too many times, you reverse the climate change, and now all humanity has to deal with global cooling (nothing to do with me).

I have the power to repair any electronic device.

 

[Starlight]

Granted! But nobody trusts you anymore because of your superpowers, and the only job you can get is as a computer repair person... sounds ok right? WRONG. You are paid by the time a repair takes, and since you repair everything merely by looking at it... you earn nothing. NOTHING I TELL YA!

I need the power to be fully refreshed on 2 hours sleep.

 

[ReKoil]

Sure thing! It only works if you have it filmed though.... so... hope you like being on national television, having people watching you sleep 😈

I'll now have the power to open and close portals to other worlds.

 

[Arcaneum]

You've got your new power, however the only portal you can open takes you to the ninth circle of Hell...

I really want like the touch of Midas apart from everything I touch instantly freezes.

 

[StCooler]

But... Your computer freezes all the time now :(

I have the power to see through objects, walls and so on.

 

[ReKoil]

Sure... but now you can't see through see-through stuff like glass.
This is you now:

Spoiler:

poor birb 😢

But hey, at least you can see what people got in their suitcases now am I right? 😉

I have the power to recognize wanted criminals on sight without them noticing.

 

[Starlight]

Granted! Hold up, what's that? Turns out every single one of your friends and family are on the list...

I would like the power to clean the house with a wave of my hand.

 

[StCooler]

The problem? Everytime you use your power, you have to spend two hours cleaning your hands :(

I have the power to foresee events 10 seconds before they arrive.

 

[ReKoil]

Sure thing. Too bad the events are set in stone and nothing you do will have any impact on them whatsoever.
Guess you can mentally prepare yourself though, at least?

I have the power to recharge myself with batteries =D
Battery operated ReKoil =o xD

 

[Megan]

Granted, but it's those old outdated batteries that are hard to get nowadays and absolutely bad for the climate!

I want the power to conquer space!

 

[Starlight]

Granted! You conquered - and are now Empress of - the space under your sink. Have fun!

I want the power of astral projection

 

[StCooler]

The problem? When your soul wants to come back from a projection, you sometimes invade the wrong body, and their soul goes to your body instead...
Sounds like a good plot for a TV show :)

I have the power to strengthen my skin at will.

 

[Retek]

The problem? Your skin is so strong, it breaks any thing on contact!

I have the power to slow down time!

 

[Megan]

Granted, but you slow down your body, as well. So nothing really changes. But you can watch yourself running in slowmotion if you're into that kinda thing!

I want the power to clean my apartment in an instant!