Recent content by poopnoodle

ma baby

pretty much everyone i know informed me they needed a place to crash for the night, so i have a houseful. and i'm ok with that. then i told my best friend's wife i'd help her pick out cabinets for their house then i forgot and just now remembered and i'm typing this sentence with deep remorse...

indian style on the floor or the bed. this rarely changes.

that's why they call 'em stress balls huhu. that's actually the least sensical/funny thing i've ever said. thanks for listening. but if i tried masturbating to relieve stress, i wouldn't be able to concentrate and not being able to climax would stress me out even more. plus i only stress out...

i'm quite the conversation starter online. although the things i say to people don't really pave the way for a good conversation. the things i say actually repel people, most of the time. irl i only greet customers. i don't greet others but i'm not unwelcoming nor do i avoid conversation, i...

my roommate and i kinda just eyeball things that are out of place (an extremely dusty corner, a full laundry basket, a mirror so polluted by toothpaste and hairspray marks that i can't make out my reflection) and take care of them. no system or list of things or anything like that.

i've gone through a lot of social ups and downs, i don't see myself ever really settling. i'm definitely not as hermitic as i once was, which is good and healthy; i have many lovely friends now, all of which i'm grateful for, but i really value and give myself plenty of alone time.

i'm really not that complicated.

you

the south isn't so bad, it's the weather and small town folk you have to look out for. if you're looking for like-minded social groups, you'd prosper in austin- i run into artists all over the place. i guess the market's pretty good too. i don't even proclaim to be an artist in terms of...

amen brother except that would drive me too crazy. if i go on a cleaning strike in my apartment things would get too gross for me to function. people would find that i do a lot of renovating. that and i can never have enough books. and they're books no one wants to read (my most recent...

[situation: there is a person who is not me typing what i say as i respond to the thread's question.] Welllllllllllllll they call me Banana. I'm 5. (sleepy chuckle) 5 as in height. (sleepy chuckle) (sings:) Summa Breeze!! Makes me feel fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine. (end sing) forever in my...

there was a death at a restaurant nearby my bar recently, the attention it received had me all baffled. passersby would gather and gossip about the situation with more intrigue than concern, which seemed a little disrespectful. if it looks like i can help, i'll do what i can. if the scene is...

my friends and i are joke-milkers. we call ourselves "Team Never-Let-it-Go." our jokes derive within our circle though, people who bring internet memes or whatever to irl are just not clever. when someone ruins a funny story by shouting "FAIL!!!!", my laughter turns into weeping for humanity.

i don't believe every single male human is a dishonest jerk with ulterior motives, i doubt most girls really do, but i keep my guard up as a result of bad experiences and surely that can be empathized with. not every man is deceitful, most of my friends happen to be upstanding and dependable...